How do you get someone who is racially prejudice to not be?

Question

I was raised to be open-minded, to base my opinion of others on how they treat me..not by the color of their skin, or by their choice of who they wish to spend their life with or anything like that. I was raised to love everyone and not hate anyone. My husband of 1 1/2 months has made it clear that NO black person is allowed at his house to visit or stay the night. My daughter's best friend is black... she is an only child, her mother is a therapist and her father is an electrician and he also works with people who have had a problem with drugs. My daughter's friend has been raised with manners, saying "yes/no ma'am", she has been raised a lot like my daughter has. I don't see a problem with them taking turns staying the night with each other, but my husband on the other hand wasn't raised like I was. My husband was raised to believe that black people stay with their kind and white people stay with their kind. She says the bible says races should not mix..I don't agree.

I have read the bible from beginning to end and I don't remember ever seeing anything in it that says racism is ok. What I did read in the bible plenty of times is "love one another". How (If I even can) do I get him to see my daughter's friend as any other 12 year old girl and not as a black girl??

I have tried to tell him that he isn't saying she can't stay the night for any reason other than the color of her skin. He said the other night that most people on drugs are black... I told him that isn't true because a few years ago he had a problem with drugs and what color is he?? He has a friend on drugs and he isn't black...he's white.
Everytime we start to talk about this issue, he gets mad and says "let's talk about something else"... so how is he supposed to know in detail what my feelings and beliefs are especially when he wants to change the subject when my feelings and beliefs don't agree with his. I told him that he should get to know my daughter's friend before judging her because it isn't fair to judge her solely on her skin color.

Answer 1

This should have been addressed before you got married, I think. I, personally, would have stopped dating such a person the second I found out they were that racist.

You need to sit down and talk to him and tell him how unreasonable he is being. If necessary, go to couples counseling. In this day and age, no one should have the attitude your husband has.

Answer 2

Your husband should be told that this is not acceptable in a modern society. The races are mixing fast. Tomorrow your white daughter may have a black boyfriend and your husband should accept it if that person truly loves your daughter, is well mannered and is capable enough to raise a family
Jesus was not white. SO why care about color of skin. They are also humans . It is the person;s character and behaviour, intellegence that matters the most and not the color of skin.

Answer 3

I was raised in an old coal mining town where, back in the day my father would tell my brothers and myself, about the consequences of beating your wife, or being racially prejudice. The "group" of men would leave a bundle of switches on the wrong doer's front porch. As a message to not do it again, or the bundle of sticks were used on the accused. Whether they were Black, Scottish, Italian, or German that moved to the area at the time. But I was raised to love everybody, to give someone the respect they deserve.

Answer 4

What the Bible says is that different religions are not supposed to mix. God wants pure worship based on his standards, not the standards of someone else's beliefs. As for your husband's racism, here is some information:

Acts 10:34, 35 - At this Peter opened his mouth and said: “For a certainty I perceive that God is not partial, but in every nation the man that fears him and works righteousness is acceptable to him.

There are several articles on overcoming prejudice in the Watchtower and Awake magazines. If you know one of Jehovah's Witnesses or live near a Kingdom Hall, you could ask for copies of the magazines on the topic. If you'd like me to e-mail you the text from the articles, I'd be happy to do so.

P.S.
It IS possible to overcome it. We have shining examples of people who have in our Kingdom Halls all over the world. :)

Answer 5

The bible does not say that, I hear this a lot and always tell people to show me where. I think you have an issue on your hand with your husband. Sad but true, you should have discussed all of these things prior to children and marriage. Your husband is a racist bigot, no other way to say it. Racism comes from ignorance, and maybe one day you can make it him that his ideas are hate filled and really ignorant. Anyone who is a true Christan does not hold racial prejudice, God taught us all to love one another no man is better than another in his eyes he created all equal. Maybe this is God's way of making your husband face his ideas of bigotry and hatred. God does work in mysterious ways. i would pray and continue to pray. Good luck and god Bless.

Answer 6

Sounds like you married the wrong guy. Sorry.

However, it's not his call. It is something you work out between the entire family. I'd imagine he is trumped there. Don't let him start dictating what will happen in a house that is not just his. Though, I would suggest your daughter go over to her friend's house instead of them being at your house. Do you really want that poor girl to have to deal with that? And your daughter will likely have better role models there than with your husband.

How to change him? Don't support his behavior.

Answer 7

Its hard but it takes time, my dad was the same way, when i was younger, but guess what ?my sister married a black man, and he is an awesome human being,they have my niece and she is just a wonderful person. your husband needs to know what he has a problem with now and tries to impose on his family will only come back and bite him in the behind. God will always put in front of you what your issue is,so that you may deal with it.My dad dealt with it and now has no problems with it , and what your husband needs to know is we all came from a different race at one time, we can be traced back to Noah. also one more thing, I was married to a white man for many years believe me, it makes no difference jerks come in all colors. :)

Answer 8

Ouch.

I suspect you and your daughter are going to have to bite the bullet on this one. I would agree with you that racist theology is, at best, a misinterpretation of the Bible, but you're not going to change your husband by argument. That will only wreck your marriage.

The subject of race never came up before you were married?

Answer 9

I agree. i think if you're prejudice you're stupid, even with the indisputable fact that that's a free united states. as an social gathering, my state legislates common sense: I truly ought to positioned on a seat belt. If i do not positioned on a seat belt it wont damage all and sundry yet myself (till i'm in an coincidence and my body flies through the windshield and hits someone). i imagine you're an fool in case you do not positioned on a seat belt, even with the indisputable fact that it should not be a regulation. The state says it makes regulations, like those, to guard me, yet they legalized adultery and homosexuality, yet those behaviors can pollute the blood furnish. (quit your crying with each and every of the thumbs down). in case you provide me a thumbs down you teach my element: That we are able to not have an opinion that's no longer in fashion or politically ideal. Now again to prejudice. If I own a organisation, and four human beings practice, easily one of it quite is polish, and that i don't like polish human beings, yet, the polish applicant stands head and shoulders above some thing, and that i do not employ her or him because of their ethnicity, i'm a fool. It shouldn't difficulty all and sundry that i'm a schmuck. that's my prerogative. as long as i'm no longer bodily hurting, or inciting yet another to break that individual. that's a slippery slope after we commence legislating common sense. If we anticipate human beings to act a particular way, it is going to in elementary words rigidity that habit lower than floor, and human beings will now no longer be difficulty-free, and also you received't understand the position all and sundry stands. It breeds dishonesty. yet another good social gathering is even as human beings say, you don't like the president because he's black. that's no longer the case, he's in simple terms as a lot white. i'd unlike him because of different causes: he's a socialist, he helps abortion, he did not pull solders out of the conflict like he promised. some human beings might want to unlike him because he's a million/2 black. So what, who cares, their in simple terms shallow and may want to't imagine previous race. they're idiots, yet they should be allowed to be. you won't be able to purchase that type of leisure.

Answer 10

Oh my. Ya know what, that's just pathetic. Good thing he's your husband and not mine. That little girl would be in my house whether he liked it or not. If not, I'd tell HIM "don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya!"