Child molesters and abusers often use the excuse that they were also molested and abused as children. The question is, why? If anything, one would think that being the victims of abuse would keep them from inflicting the same kind of suffering on others.
2006-10-04 02:21:04 · 19 answers · asked by tangerine 7 in Health ➔ Mental Health
There are plenty of people who were abused as children who didn't grow up to become abusers themselves. We all have choices.
2006-10-04 02:42:36 · update #1
The problem is large and is increasing. Child abuse and neglect are complex and multidimensional problems. Very often it is a true statement. My mother was abused and she abused me And allowed others (IE step father) to abuse me as well. I then became a parent and being young single and having had no positive example to follow began to abuse my child. I was lucky I saw the vicious circle and sought help early to stop abusing and raised a healthy happy loving human being who does not remember abuse as part of his life. It would seem from a logical point that the abused would not abuse but for many abusiveness was seen as the only attention we were given and tho it was negative in nature continued into adulthood to even seek it out. Often times those in society whom have never been abused can not understand this physiological aspect of abuse. I don't know if this answers your question but perhaps gives a bit of insight to the patterns of abuse
2006-10-04 02:46:10 · answer #1 · answered by nana_viki 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
There are tons of studies that show a strong link between childhood victimization and adult victimizing. It's not an excuse, it's an explanation - though Foley's attorney certainly *sounds* like he's making it an excuse.
Even though it's counterintuitive, as you point out, it still seems to be the case - and we need to figure out how to break this terrible cycle. Meanwhile, of course, Foley and his ilk should suffer the criminal consequences.
Fast addition: Before anyone misunderstands, being a victim as a child is NOT a predictor. I'm not saying that. I AM saying that the evidence shows an increased likelihood that a child victim will become a victimizer - but this doesn't mean "most" or "many" or "a majority" or "a lot" will fall into this - just a few more.
2006-10-04 02:30:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
For the same reason that children of alcoholics often grow up to be alcoholics and children of abusers often grow up to abuse, etc. Childhood experiences are often integrated into the personality of the adult.
Having said that, while those experiences make you more at risk to do them yourself as an adult, the adult SHOULD know right from wrong and get help for their problem rather than giving in to it.
2006-10-04 02:37:31 · answer #3 · answered by kathy_is_a_nurse 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
because we live in a society that seems to condone blaming the other guy and never accepting personal accountability. The world is full of "victims" and the victim mentality keeps people on the path of least resistance rather than striving to overcome challenges/obstacles. It also serves as a built in excuse whenever they get in trouble. I get so sick of that mentality. I was an abused child and I worked hard to overcome that. I don't believe in that whole "cycles repeat" crap, if they do its simply because the abuser makes the choice to continue it.
2006-10-04 02:26:43 · answer #4 · answered by Nathan arrived 8/4 :) 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
It's not an excuse. The molestation stems from the abuse. I know that you're referring to Mark Foley, and when I heard this yesterday, the thought that he was molested as a child came into my head prior to him admitting it. It is a statistical fact that child molesters/pedophiles were molested/abused at some point in their life, especially during childhood. His sexual abuse has manifested itself into homosexuality; this man has admitted that he is gay. This same child sexual abuse applies to many homosexuals (a FACT that they vehemently deny).
Don't believe me? Do the research before you write me off as a "homophobe"!
2006-10-04 02:31:42 · answer #5 · answered by incognitas8 4 · 4⤊ 2⤋
I agree that they might have dealt w/ some type of abuse.. I agree w/ your comment, but people deal w/ there problems differently. I know women that have been abused, molested and raped, and they are overly protective mothers... Some people get into drugs, etc...
2006-10-04 02:32:18 · answer #6 · answered by qbanita0113 4 · 7⤊ 0⤋
I believe if they were repeatedly abused as a child they learned (or believed) that was acceptable behavior. It was probably performed by an adult and adults appear as all knowing beings to a child. What an adult does must be right, or okay. As the child grows to be an adult, society may dictate to them the behavior was unacceptable but yet they are still drawn to that type of behavior. An example....one may spend his/her childhood routinely attending a church. As an adult this one may find it normal to go to church, and abnormal to skip it. He or she may feel guilty if they don't do what they learned was acceptable behavior as a child. That's just my two cents....
2006-10-04 02:26:54 · answer #7 · answered by Lisa J 1 · 7⤊ 0⤋
They are messed up. I know from talking to my mother that it is a hard issue to deal with and hard to overcome. Her mother physically and verbally abused her as a child. My mother barely ever put a hand on us and allowed my father to give out punishments. She fought it hard and won.
2006-10-04 02:37:41 · answer #8 · answered by motrouble 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Because its tue 70% of the time,and usually the court goes lighly once hearing their past.
I wanna know why does the court system go lighly on females then males when it comes down to molestation.
2006-10-04 02:26:49 · answer #9 · answered by dreamk8000 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I will have to agree with the ones who say that it is an excuse. Our justice system has given criminals excuses to use and have completely failed the innoncent when it comes to real justice. In all theory, it's not completely the criminal's fault, our justice system is partly at fault also for giving them excuses to use.
2006-10-04 11:56:21 · answer #10 · answered by passionate_play270 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋