i am getting maried in June 07, i am totally in love with my guy, but everytime we have sex i never come, help i have tried everything i was told i need to relax and as far as a i know i am relaxed, please help
2006-10-03 19:26:55 · 21 answers · asked by jacstar1986 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Sorry i know this should be in a different category but i didnt know what to put it under.
Also i do know how to get myself off, and i have a vibrator that i have mentioned to use during sex but he is scared of it, he thinks i will like that more than him.
2006-10-03 19:42:53 · update #1
Don't worry, this can be a common problem for a woman. It will come, in time.
2006-10-03 19:34:56 · answer #1 · answered by Gothic Martha™ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all your not relaxed, if your thinking about being relaxed or trying to be your not, secondly you need to tell him what gives you pleasure and what is just going through the motions, there's a difference between making love and having sex, sex is physical, were as love is more of a mental and intimate state.
2006-10-04 02:37:49 · answer #2 · answered by Mark G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have read through all the other answers so far most are correct but they all neglected to say that you won't climax by penetration alone. You have to have stimulation on your clitoris. all your nerve endings are there just like they are in the end of a mans penis. I know this all sounds very clinical but it's true. Try different positions so you get that stimulation. Think of something that makes you horny while your having sex and don't worry about your partner he won't know what your thinking. Good luck in your marriage I hope it all works for you.
2006-10-04 02:56:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I cant really help you exactly but I would like to let you know that you are far from alone with this. Many many women experiance this problem, more than would actually admit it. All I can say hang in there and try not to get too upset about it, try some other forms of pleasure with your man.
2006-10-04 19:17:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Involve it yourself! (vibrator) ... I just found out my bf gets off more cuz I told him he could take pictures of me right outta the blue! Maybe you need more excitement... something NEW that you haven't done or tried yet. Maybe you two can go to a Umm? boutique thingy (lol I dunno the word) *I know here there is a place called AMAZING... I think the site is http://www.amazing.net and maybe you can find something MORE pleasurous that HE will like to use as well...!!! :) Good luck! Enjoy... most of all be OPEN to him... SUGGEST things and if he doesn't feel comfy then he doesn't feel comfy... just make sure you ask and ask and then ask if he'll at least TRY it once. "Can't KNOCK it till ya try it right? right! " ... :) good luck~!
2006-10-04 03:10:58 · answer #5 · answered by sweetsuezq4u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your probably trying too hard honey. Loosen up and don't go try to climb to the moon. Sometimes women just don't. It doesn't mean the sex wasn't great. and doesn't mean your not right for each other. There is a lot more to true love than just sex
2006-10-04 02:38:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
its not uncommon. any woman that denies is lying. you need to be open with your sexuality after all you are marrying him. intercourse itself never really does it for me either. oral stimulation used to be the only way i would have an orgasm. you should try vibrating toys. use it on yourself during intercourse. it works wonders, trust me. me and my husband have a great sex life. we "come" together all the time. congrats on your upcoming wedding and good luck
i find it comical that so many men responded to your question as if they are an authority of a womans anatomy
he needs to get over being scared of your vibrator. would he rather you get off with him or by yourself. have you ever used it with him before? if not he doesnt know what he is missing. my husband loves it, he says i tense up and create more friction for him. your fiance concern needs to be with sexually satisfying you, that is what is important here, not his insecurities. there is absolutely nothing wrong with you or that you may need some extra stimulation, alot of woman do. the two of you need to enjoy eachother and unfortunately us as woman dont get off on a cool breeze. tell him to suck it up and try it good luck
i meant use your vibrator on your clitoris during intercourse in case that wasnt clear, barbara seemed to miss that in my answer
2006-10-04 02:38:59 · answer #7 · answered by dawn 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? Honestly, it takes most women a long time to "finish"...around 20 minutes....and I know I didn't climax for the first time until around 27....and I thought I had before, but now I know what it truly means!
2006-10-04 07:41:00 · answer #8 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi im Kate you will not come during the usual postions in sex you need to find a way that you can take over and get yourself off do it for a bit first then get yourself off then he can get off it takes me a few minutes but it does happen good luck
2006-10-04 03:09:43 · answer #9 · answered by kate w 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let him come first as usuasl let him pull out. Then on the second race it take a little long and think about how sweet and loving he his.arose yourself about him sure you will come. Maybe he come very fast.
Try gentle sex and if it did not work for you then make it Hard.but have pity on him since you are stronger than him.
2006-10-04 02:38:52 · answer #10 · answered by R.I.A 30 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Practice, Practice, Practice
2006-10-04 02:31:00 · answer #11 · answered by g_man 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋