How should you act towards someone who has cancer?

Question

Should you talk about it? or ignore it?

Answer 1

Take your cue from them. Maybe they're tired of talking about it, or don't want to think about it. Sounds like you're sensitive to that, and that's great.

I'd just ask if they want to talk about it, offering your sympathy as a friend. If they say no, just drop it and move on.

Answer 2

Two of my very best friends have cancer. Talking about it or not all depends on how close you are to this person and if YOU feel comfortable talking about it if you are close. Most people do not like to talk about their serious illness with someone they think will only feel sorry for them. People that are terminally ill do not normally want your sympathy, they just need a shoulder every once in a while. One of my friends was very open about all of her Dr.'s visits, problems, feelings, etc. Yet my other friend took a little coaxing. After I explained how my first friend had cancer and the things we discussed my friend slowly started to open up more. You just have to approach this subject with respect for the other person's feelings and take your time. But under no circumstances should you push this person to talk about it, or try to talk to them if you are not prepared for all that will come. Remember they will be emotional, upset, sick, tired, hopeless at times, nonchalant at others. It is a rollercoaster ride and there is no chicken ramp off. Once you are on you are on for the whole ride. Good luck and I hope that you do get to talk to this person about their cancer. Maybe you can help them in some way.

Answer 3

The way you should treat someone with cancer is the way you should treat anyone: with kindness and respect.

I'm sorry that someone you know has cancer. I don't have it myself, but I can only imagine that it can be a lonely and scary thing. Surely this would be a time where you would want good friends around you.

And if you are a good, close friend to this person, it seems natural that you should be able to discuss any aspect of your lives, including cancer.

In other words, it's a personal topic, so people that you know well enough will probably feel comfortable discussing it with you and people you don't know well enough might not. Hopefully you will listen carefully and have the sensitivity to recognize when they are trying to bring it up because they want to talk about it. But unless you are really close to that person I'm not sure you should bring it up.

Answer 4

Depends who the person is - essentially you have the same relationship to that person that you do for other matters. I'm guessing this is a friend or work colleague or someone you know at school, someone you usually talk to. If so, then ignoring something so huge is actually not very kind.

If you are wondering HOW to talk about something so uncomfortable, you can start with that: "Gee, I heard about your medical situation and I am so sorry - and I really don't know what to say or do. Do you want to talk about it, or would you rather we just go on with other things?"

Answer 5

The same way you act towards someone without cancer. Listen when they talk. Look at things from the persons point of view. Educate yourself, but do not offer medical suggestions without invitation. Ask how you can help during times of hardship, but do not force yourself on the person. Do not promise what you will not be able to deliver later.

Answer 6

well it would depend on how they are acting. If they are sad about it. Then a sympathic ear is good. If they are in " a fighting spirit" cheer them on. If they put you in a spot then it is time for you to take over and give them your support (if you want).....The thing is do not allow that person to manipulate your life. Do not feel guilty. Do not wallow in sorrow....Believe me it can be hard not to get fully involved but that only creates dependency issues. Do not listen to "every procedure" and new pills they are taking. Because that stuff only makes their problem yours. Some people get so mad they want others to feel just as bad. How can you be of help if you are in the same mental place as them?

Answer 7

If you know the person really well then they probably will not mind if you ask them some questions. It might help you understand whats going on with them. Don't treat them like their a piece of glass that will break. Smile and laugh and have fun with them. You would want to remember them smiling and joking instead of tears. But if they need you to put your arms around them and let them cry make sure your there for them. Don't be afraid to ask if they mind talking about it. People just want people to be real with them.

Answer 8

Do some research to help cure them. Start here.

Take a look at the site below which explains many misunderstood things about the cancer industry, and has some natural cures too.

Cancer
http://dgwa1.fortunecity.com/body/cancer.html

Answer 9

Is it someone you know well? Let them lead the conversation. You can ask generally "how are you doing?", but don't pry.

Trust me, people living with cancer want to be treated as regular human beings, not as a victim.

Answer 10

don't be afraid of it. if they want to talk to you about it, they will. have a friend who got cancer (he's in remission now, thank God!) and he hated feeling like people felt sorry for him and he hated it when people where all over him trying to take care of him. but when he wanted to talk, he would. Different people react to their cancers differently. So, let your friend deal with it the way and when they can for themselves. Don't push the issue.