If you have an unruly child, do you recommend spanking them or what?

Answer 1

I recommend disciplining an unruly child in the way you feel most comfortable doing it and in whatever way works best on the child. Just be consistent about your discipline. Spanking works great on some kids and doesn't even phase others. Some children could be spanked all day and still not obey. Other kids you just have to look at and they will start obeying. It depends on the parent and the child. Sometimes I spank my child, sometimes I put him in the corner, sometimes I take away his toys. It just depends on the act of disobedience.

Answer 2

How are we going to raise children who do not believe in violence if we demonstrate our disappointment in their behaviour by spanking them. I have reared 3 boys and when they were this little a simple change in tone of voice or a look reserved for (I don't like what you are doing) was enough to stop the behaviour. I am and was not the perfect mother, I felt like losing it many times and it really helps to count to 3 or 10 before taking action.

Think about the situation before reacting, and if you have more than one child think of how they may view the situation if you react too suddenly.

The term unruly covers a broad spectrum, if a child throws a tantrum in a store, this happened to me, I had informed my 3 1/2 year old that mommy was not purchasing a toy for him today but that he could go and look at the toy aisle as was the custom when we shopped. Somehow he got it in his head that he wanted a toy he already had at home, when I informed him that no, mommy explained already that we were not toy shopping today he burst into this very LOUD crying and threw a tantrum. I immediatly left the cart there, grabbed his hand and informed him that we were going to the car now, he continued his tantrum all the way to the car, once in the car I explained to him that he was not being a very nice little boy and that I had already told him not to ask for a toy that day, he continued to cry and when I informed him that he already had that toy and hardly played with it he stopped crying and told me he could not find it anymore. I had put the toy away, as I often did when they showed disinterest because having 3 close to the same age boys the toys were never in short supply and once we got home I took it out for him.

But the point is he never threw another tantrum in a store, I believe because I stuck to it, it was embarassing as hell but the time and the lesson he learned was worth it.

Toddlers and preschoolers are alot smarter than we give them credit for and they are testing the waters so to speak, just how far can I push etc. Stand firm, this toddler will grow up to be a big teenager one day and if you let them bully you at 3 or 4 well you get the picture. Good luck.

Answer 3

Each child is different. And some techniques that work on one child will not work on another. You need to find what works for you. But what ever you decide on you have to stick to it. Most of discipline is just sticking to the rules that you give your child.

You can't tell them one day that it's ok to draw on the walls and then spank them for it the next day. They don't understand that. You have to tell them over and over and over again what the rules are.

It's like playing a game with a sibling. If they don't tell you what the rules are then keep changing them you will never master the game.

Parents don't come with instruction manuals anymore than kids do. We have to work out the rules of the game as we both go along. And hope that everyone wins in the end.

Answer 4

This is a difficult question because it not only goes to peoples beliefs but their own upbringing. Generally people who were spanked as children have the idea that it didn't hurt them so it won't hurt their children. I was raised that way but believe differently. There are so many other ways to discipline without using violence. There always needs to be consistency and a firm hand in dealing with children. Getting down on their level and letting them know that it is not okay to do something wrong is the first step. If you believe in time out it works if you use it properly. Never leave your child in time out with out being supervised. Don't give in to whining and crying. A minute for each year of age is a good guide. I give my older children consequences like sentences or chores. They have learned from that. If they are fighting between themselves I make them hold hands until they get along. They will usually figure things out for themselves before one of them has to go to the bathroom. Good luck.

Answer 5

I think spanking, not beating is the best form of discpiline you can give a child, as the last resort. I wouldn't spank my child every time he did something wrong, but if he kept on acting up, then yes, he would get a spanking.

Answer 6

no i would use spanking as the very last resort. i usually use (social disapproval method i think it's called) i lower my tone and tell my son something once. then if he doesn't listen, i grab him by the arm, bend down to his level, look him in the eyes and tell him again, calmly and stern. i make him repeat me, whatever instructions, and then he has to say "yes mommy." if he's totally out of line and this doesn't work i use counting. i count to 3 and he has until 3 to do or start to do whatever it is i need for him to do. if he doesn't, a smack on the legs are in order. good luck, it's not easy, but be consistent and calm! do not get your child accustomed to seeing you being irate and at your wits end.

Answer 7

Sometimes a spank threat is all you need to get a child back inline. I've only had to spank my son a couple times and he's 7 now.

Answer 8

Personally spanking is not for me. I have raised wonderful 17 and 8 year old boys and I have a 16 month old little girl. I have never laid a hand on any of them. I do not believe that you teach your children to act appropriately by being violent with them. It sends the wrong message. ................. This is my opinion. You have to make your own decision.

Answer 9

Been There- I was having the same problem with my child and my Psychologist told me to praise him for all of his good actions. she also said to put him in time out when he is bad, 1minute per year so for a four year old he would go into time out for 4 minutes and explain to him why and for how long. at first i was losing my patients with this whole system but after sticking to it my child is finally has good behavior. I'm not embarrassed to take Him to public anymore!

Answer 10

what you are calling a unruly child is a frustrated child exausted and who want lots of love..hey spend lotta time with him and if you will give him love than he will stop doing it...never spank him you dont know bad this thing is..