who has a child....?

Question

who hates to go Poopey on the toilet?She screams and crys and she is 4 years old and out of diapers. She is not constipated. She just holds it in untill she cant hold it anymore. What should I do. Her doctor said to give her Mineral Oil which helps, and we also has a cream for her bum that doesnt make her bum hurt when she goes. I dont understand why she is doing this. Please help!

Answer 1

It's actually pretty normal, common behavior. My daughter hated going poopy in the potty, she would insist on a diaper to do that, yes, even up to age 4, although she was completely potty-trained by 3. My friend is going through this right now with her 3 year old, she waits until she gets her night-time pull up to do a poop. She is completely potty-trained as far as peeing, but will sometimes need to poop so bad she'll have an accident in her pants if she can't wait until that night-time pull-up, Just have patience with your daughter, it will happen. Give her a diaper when she needs to poop, but also offer her the option of trying to go in the toilet. If she does go in the toilet, make a big deal of it, hoop and holler and praise her like crazy. It's an anxiety thing that she will most likely outgrow, and mineral oil and laxatives will not help her get over that anxiety. Good Luck.
P.S.- And if it makes you feel better my other friend's son was doing that too, and over the past few weeks has become 100% potty-trained, for both pee and poop. So hang in there. You can also try letting her sit on the toilet and reading, or you read to her, that's what worked with my daughter.

Answer 2

I'm not a child psychologist, just a father of a 4yr boy that doesn't like to go either. Sometimes to the point were it hurts his "tummy", which is actually one of the ways we get him to at least try.
If he has not gone in a couple days, we start reminding him that he needs to go or his tummy will start hurting again. Most of the time this will at least get him to go into the bathroom and try.
We added Flax Seed Oil to his diet which seems to help...it probably isn't a solution on its own, but combined with trying to increase his fiber and reminding him to go it is an improvement. He does have a problem with constipation if we let it go too long...to the point of having to administer an enema (ugh)

The reason why? Because it is uncomfortable and takes her away from fun things like playing. She hasn't learned to think past the immediate (if she is like our son) and just wants to do what she wants to do when she wants to do it. It could also be part of a power struggle, just to do the opposite of what you want.

Eventually she will learn that going regularly and not waiting is actually better. Then she won't be interrupted when in the middle of playing and will not be as uncomfortable.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

I don't have that problem yet, but I have heard about kids being afraid to go number two in the toilet, why I don't know. Just be patient with her, don't get angry or upset that can only make the fear worse. Read to her while she sits there (maybe books about going potty on the toilet), sit and talk to her, tell her to take her time and to be calm and it will be easier, or maybe even a puppet show to keep her distacted from crying.

Answer 4

Is she afraid of the toilet? By her one of those seats that fit over the regular toilet seat. Is she afraid of the water splashing? Put some toilet paper in the toilet to catch her poop before it splashes. He holding it to long, will make it hurt coming out, so add some extra fiber to her diet to soften it up, fruits and cereals. Poor baby girl, I doubt this faze will last long. Just try to make sure she is comfortable on the potty..... those seats are pretty cool, fitted for her tiny bum!

Good Luck!

Answer 5

I would say before trying mineral oil, which is disgusting, add a lot of fruits to her diet. Chopped grapes, berries, applesauce. canned pumpkin is a laxative that doesn't taste too bad, you can mix it in a little whipped cream. This will encourage her to go more often and help her stool be softer. If she knows it hurts it doesn't make her want to go more. Good luck

Answer 6

My son would do that too. We would keep him on the toilet and tell him to keep trying. We would read to him and wouldn't let him off the potty till he would go. After 2 or 3 times, it got better. You just have to patient. Give her a nice reward after it happenes.

Answer 7

I have a son that likes to poo in his training pants rather than the toilet. He always tells me when he has to pee, but when it comes to poo, he refuses to let me know and when I finally smell it, he says that he did not poo his pants that someone or something else pooed in there. He thinks it is funny, but it is not. I figure it is because of the baby though and a jealousy issue, but in your case I am not sure. And what is this BURN that you are talking about? Good Luck!!

Answer 8

give her a book to look at when she sits, may distract her enough to go

Answer 9

strap her down with duct tape and bungee cords

Answer 10

just be very patient.