I love my daughter and I love ebing a Mom, but lately I have been stressed and overwhelmed. I even don't want to be bothered sometimes and I want to just hand her to her Dad for a while ...a good while. I feel bad that I feel that way, is it normal? Wow, the stress and demand can be horrible and it pushes me - so much that I sometimes miss when it was just me alone.
2006-10-03 07:54:01 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I can't pick a best answer because ALL of your answers have been such a big help. I'll let it go in for voting.
Thanks to all!!!
2006-10-04 06:32:50 · update #1
Totally normal, try seeing if you can get relatives to help out. You may be having the baby blues, you should talk to your OB, congrats on being a new mom.
It becomes not normal when you have feelings to harm the baby.
2006-10-03 07:57:15 · answer #1 · answered by momie_2bee 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely normal.
If anyone besides your child got in your face and cried and whinged non-stop and demanded your constant attention, how would you feel about it? Why do people think you should be immune just because it is your child? Constant noise can drive you crazy, especially for more introverted personality types. Most moms of infants feel this way, most just refuse to admit it because they have fallen for this myth about women having a natural mommy gene and don't want to appear as bad moms. If you are breastfeeding, it can be particularly bad because a lot of women start to feel more like food than a person.
Just remember that baby is just being a baby and is not doing this on purpose or because she doesn't love you or because you are doing anything wrong. It will get better as baby gets older and starts becoming more independent. Until then, try to stay calm when holding or speaking to your baby because she can sense your stress and it can cause her to cry more. And make dad help, you deserve some time for yourself as well.
2006-10-03 08:04:24 · answer #2 · answered by nativeAZ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like me. Most days are pretty good and my daughter and I have a good time, but some days I am watching the clock and cant wait till it is nap time or cant wait for my husband to come home and take care of things for a while. It does not help that I am 40 weeks and 3 days pregnant with my second child and everything is making me tense right now. I do feel very bad when I get stressed and dont have the patience I want to have with her. I feel like I have been pregnant for so long I dont know what feeling normal feels like anymore. What I do when I get stressed is to put on her favorite movie and it will give me some time to chill out and she is happy too. Since I just re-read your question it sounds like your daughter is still a tiny baby, maybe putting her in her stroller and going for a nice walk while the weather is still nice will help. I used to do that when my daughter was a baby and figured the fresh air would do us both good. Also try to make some time for yourself to do something you like to do. Every Sunday is my day. I get to sleep in if I want and normally go out to lunch and shopping with my mom.
2006-10-03 08:20:38 · answer #3 · answered by sooz 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Everyone goes through that. I have three children myself 11, 8 and 6 (the youngest one has Austim). I miss not having no responsibilities sometimes too but remember what you have and that is a beautiful child that loves you no matter what.
Put a few hours aside one day a week to do something for you because everyone needs ME time. Make as much memories now as you can because they grow so fast and those memories will be all you have to remember those times. But don't every think for a minute you are missing out by being a Mom. It's not easy, and it can be tiring but it's the most rewarding job you'll every have!
2006-10-03 08:07:58 · answer #4 · answered by blondibee72 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've heard this from almost every mother I know, its so normal to want alone time to do your own thing. Its a big help if you can get responsible family and friends to babysit and get out with your husband too. I'm away from family and I always had support there, but now I'm "stuck" when I want to go out with friends or spend quality time with my hubby. I can get overwhelmed and moody, but when I get this way I let my hubby know he's got to take over for a bit and I get some fresh air. Your not alone in these feelings. Some have them worse than others, my sister had the "baby blues" and it was really bad, but her Doctor helped her through it.
I hope everything works out for you!
Live, Love & Laugh,
Michelle
2006-10-03 08:12:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's completely normal! Don't agonize over it. It is also good for your child to be in the care of Daddy for awhile, gives them some bonding time. It's also great that your admit this and know when to ask for a helping hand. Wanting a break does not ever mean you don't love your daughter. I often find myself daydreaming of when I was alone, as in not being married or having kids; doesn't make me any less of a mother or wife. And usually after I have had some "me time" I'm happy to return to my real life. Only get worried when you are relieved and don't want to return to reality.
2006-10-03 10:37:41 · answer #6 · answered by funrdhdpeach 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sure, that is completely normal. I felt the same way. I have 4 now and feel that but X4. :) Every Saturday I take the afternoon and evening to myself while my husband watches the kids. Usually I shop or see a movie and have dinner with friends. I call it my "what kids?!?! time". The time away and to yourself is VERY important. The healthier you are emotionally, the better a Mommy you will be to your baby. This is a hard time for you, just remember that taking care of yourself is also important during this transition in your life.
2006-10-03 08:07:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes,it is ok to feel this way and you what I did,I gave her to her father with no problem because I was very tired and overwhelmed with alot of things so he gave me some time to myself because I had miss that for a long time.He did it for a couple of days and it felt wonderful but after while I started missing my little stankin butt.So I just got use to it she's going on two and she's the most precious thing that ever happen to me and I wouldn't change that for the world.Relax,you'll be ok,and believe me things r not getting any better except you won't have to by diapers no longer.POTTY TRAINING
That's what I'm about to start doing now she's showing me she's ready.GOOD LUCK
2006-10-03 08:04:36 · answer #8 · answered by Sister Queen Mama 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are one of the millions of parents like this. You need some time to yourself. Not at home or at work but by yourself. Go to a park, theater, or something you enjoy. Get some time off. Everyone needs a vacation. (even from the family) . I am a mother of a 3 year old & a 3 month old. I go walking to get away. I also like to go grocery shopping by myself. Do what you want for a day & see if that helps. If it carries on longer then go get help. There is nothing wrong with asking for help.
2006-10-03 08:08:27 · answer #9 · answered by staxi 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are perfectly normal. In fact, that is probably the most normal that you will feel for the next 17 or 18 years.
Give your daughter to Dad, it is good for both of them. In fact, get together with some friends, get a sitter or Dad and make plans to get out for a few hours once a week. I took a ceramics class, was awful at it, but it was 3 hours out of the house with people that could talk. It was great for me mentally.
2006-10-03 08:01:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it is normal and a lot of people feel that way from time to time. I am a single mom and often feel that way, but I have nobody to hand my son to for awhile. Hang in there, maybe try an anti-depressant or hand him off for the weekend and go do whatever you want for a day or two. Good luck!
2006-10-03 10:32:12 · answer #11 · answered by Turbo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋