Could you guys give me some corny jokes? please?

Question

example: what do you call a 3 legged donkey?


A wonkey

Answer 1

How do you make a tissue dance?

Put a little boogie in it.

How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?

A buccaneer.

Answer 2

A woman goes to her boyfriend's parents' house for dinner.
This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.

The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her
nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost
making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to
relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty fart.

It wasn't loud, but everyone at the table heard the poof. Before she
even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend's father looked
over at the dog that had been snoozing under the woman's chair, and
said in a rather stern voice, "Skippy!".

The woman thought, "This is great!" and a big smile came across her face. A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again. This time, she didn't even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer rrrrrip.

The father again looked at the dog and yelled, "Dammit Skippy!" Once again the woman smiled and thought "Yes!" A few minutes later the woman had to let another rip. This time she didn't even thinkabout it.
She let a fart rip that rivaled a train whistle blowing.

Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled,
"Dammit Skippy, get away from her, before she shits on you!"

Answer 3

Well
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Answer 4

Why did the man go into Sainsbury's and stab a box of Rice Krispies?
He was a CEREAL KILLER

A duck goes into a bar and orders a pint of lager.
"That's £2.50" the landlord says.
"That's alright" the duck replies "just put it on my bill"

If you have 2 apples, are they a pear?

My mate was shaving the fluff off his bottom. He caught the skin, causing it to bleed, then dropped dead. Why?

A R S E NICK!
(had to have that word, otherwise the joke wouldn't work)

What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot

What's brown and sticky?
A stick

What's brown and sounds like a bell?
D-u-n-g-g-g-g-g-g-g

Are they ok to start with?

Answer 5

What did the bedspread say to the sheet?
I've got you covered.

What kind of horses go out after dark?
Nightmares.

Answer 6

1. I called your boyfriend GAY and he hit me with his purse!!
2.What do you call a person who goes on talking when nobody is interested?
Ans. A teacher! (only a joke!)

Hehehe!

Answer 7

What do you call a Boomerang that doesn't come back?

A stick.

Answer 8

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Impatient Cow

Impatient Cow Wh.........(doesn't finish)

MOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's funnier when you say it out loud to someone.

Answer 9

What do you get when you cross a centipede and a parrot?

A walkie talkie
he he

Answer 10

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