I've been dating my boyfriend for a year now and i really do love him....i've just find myself getting insecure while i'm with him. I dont know if its me...or if he makes me feel this way. Sometimes i think i should end it because i need to figure myself out more, and get past my insecurities. Being in a relationship when your insecure isn't fun...any suggestions?
2006-10-03 01:13:07 · 18 answers · asked by Kbailey 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
if you are aware of the insecurity but unaware who's responsible for that, I think you need some time to reflect.. You love him that much and this must be the reason why you should stick with your relationship. You just need time to be away from each other so that you can think well. After a certain time of reflection, you would know what or who is responsible for the insecurities you have. Insecurity should not be a reason for breaking relationships, actually. It should serve as another reason why a relationship would grow. Since you love him, don't give up on him. Work on the problem. If you don't work on the problem, that would happen again in future relationship. If you broke up with him and you'd finally know someday that you made a mistake in doing so because of not being able to settle the prblem, you'd probably be dwelling on this so much...
2006-10-03 01:43:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
U know there must be a reason why u dont feel secure around him, Is it the way his personality roles, or is it the way he value you, There must be a good reason, b/c if anything u should feel very very secure around him. If not u need to talk to him and sort it out, If he knew about this and he loves u, he will try really hard to help u through this, U see, u dont need to cut the relationship everytime there is a negative issue at stake. Just talk to him about it and ask him to help u, (he will know what to do) If u find u dont feel comfortable talking to him about this matter, than u need to look more closely ur relatioship and the bond that u have created in this past year, a year is a long time u know.
Good luck, and try solving it with him first before u make a decision that can brake both of u. If it dont work than atleast u didnt go without a fight. Ya gotta do what ya gotta do.
2006-10-03 08:21:25 · answer #2 · answered by chinaz777 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you need to think about what you are feeling insecure about. If you can't identify the problem, then there is no solution, with or without him. Once you have figured out the "why" of the feeling, then you can talk to him about ways to fix it.
Do you feel like the relationship is moving too fast, then slow things down a bit.
Is it a self esteem issue, then he can help you find ways to boost your confidence.
Do you feel like you are loosing yourself in the relationship, then find time to spend apart with your own friends and pursuing your own interests, and each of you can have a life outside of the relationship.
If he pressuring you to take the next step, then talk to him about what you are and are not ready for.
Whatever the problem is, you are better off talking to him about it before you make the decision to end it. You say that you love him, and love is rare and precious. It shouldn't be thrown away so easily. Try to work things out with him; otherwise you may regret it later on. In reality, relationships aren't just fun and games. It takes a lot of work to have a successful relationship that lasts. You will have ups and downs, but you can't let the downs tear you apart. If you allow things to end relationships without even trying to work them out, you will never find a lasting relationship. Part of the strength of a good relationship is the ability to solve their differences, and overcome the problems. You have to work at it a little every day.
2006-10-03 08:33:29 · answer #3 · answered by welches_grape_jelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It certainly would be a good idea to find the source of your insecurity. In all relationships there is a phenomena where one partner is more in love than the other. The difference can be vast or small, but I must tell you when I am the one that loves more, I feel vulnerable and insecure.
Peace and Good Luck.
2006-10-03 08:19:07 · answer #4 · answered by -Tequila17 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you just started feeling insecure about things it's probably something in the relationship. let him know. If you don't feel that you can talk to him it's time to end it after a year you should be able to.
2006-10-03 08:15:48 · answer #5 · answered by space case 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
might be best to end it and figure yourself out more like you said, you cant have a healthy good relationship if you are insecure with him. good luck!
2006-10-03 08:17:29 · answer #6 · answered by sweets 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wen u go into a relationship u can never have enough guarantee of what may or may not happen,the question u should be asking urself is whether u really are ready to say u r in love or if u are trying to convince urself.get ur priorities rite.talk to him and c what he says and if he really does love u, u will hear it in his answer
2006-10-03 08:19:31 · answer #7 · answered by casey4396 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i disagree with space case, if this guy has invested a year of his life you have no right to take away the one thing that he in it for, im talkin about the poon. if you want to break up with him so you can battle the demons in your head fine but let him know that the kitchen will still be open for business, but if this mean your gonna close down the shop then you need to suppress your feelings as long as you can. thanks good luck
2006-10-05 03:50:10 · answer #8 · answered by chip 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Were only humans....Insecurities is not good...See for yourself what seems to be the problem in your relationship...
2006-10-03 08:38:13 · answer #9 · answered by phew!! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Discuss your feelings with him before you decide to end it. Perhasps by talking to him he can ease your insecurities.
2006-10-03 10:03:02 · answer #10 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋