Would You Lick Your Ear For $50.00?

Question

A man was sitting at a table in the back of the bar with a friend.

He walked up to the bartender and bet him $50 that he could lick his ear.

Now the bartender knew this guy had been drinking quite a bit with his friend and was probably drunk but he decided he could use the fifty bucks so he told the man it was a deal.

The man reached around and pulled his ear lobe to his mouth and licked it. Now the bartender was awed. He handed the man $50 and asked how he did that.

The man said "I have a rubber ear" he ordered another beer and went back to his table.

About a half hour later the man came back up to the bar and said "Hey bartender, I bet you $50 I can lick my eye."

The bartender said, "ok you're on" So the man pulled his eye out and licked it and put it back in. The bartender was stunned and demanded to know how the man did it.

The man replied "I have a glass eye."

The bartender said fair is fair, here's you fifty bucks."

About an hour later the same man came up to the bar and said to the bartender, "Hey bartender, I bet you $200 that you can put a shot glass at one end of the bar and i can stand at the other end of the bar and p-i-s-s into that shot glass without getting a single drop on your bar."

Now by this time the bartender knew that the man was drunk and saw an opportunity to get his money back and some, so he agreed. He placed the shot glass at the end of the bar.

The man stood at the other end of the bar and pissed all over the bar.....not a single drop made it to the shot glass.

The bartender was wiping up the mess laughing his *** off. He asked the man "Now, why did you do that when you were up $100."

The drunk man smiled pointed at the table in the back and said "do you see that man over there?"

The bartender said "Yes"

"Well I bet him $1,000 that I could p-i-s-s all over your bar and you would clean it up with a smile!"

Answer 1

Too bad he couldn't have someone else who worked there clean it up. i laughed so hard i almost P-I-S-S-E-D myself.

Answer 2

A man went to a hardware store and bought a bucket and an anvil. He stopped by the livestock dealer and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. Now his problem was how to carry them all. He hit upon an idea: He’d put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in his other hand. When he was on his way, a little old lady approached him and asked for directions. “Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?” the lady asked. “Well, as a matter of fact, I live at 1616 Mockingbird Lane. Let’s take the short cut and go down this alley. We’ll be there in no time,” the man answered. The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said: “I am a widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won’t hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and ravish me?” The man said: “Holy smokes, lady! I am carrying a bucket, an anvil, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?” The lady said: “Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the anvil on top of the bucket, and I’ll hold the chickens.”

Answer 3

That one was the best I've heard in a long time! Made me just laugh out loud!

Answer 4

Funny. Only men would pee in public. On a bar. Geez. Have to show it every chance they get.

Answer 5

LOL. I hope he didn't lose that glass eyeball when he got threw out on his ear! LOL. LOL.

Answer 6

Never heard this one before! Good one!

Answer 7

That was too good! I am still laughing

Answer 8

hey nice one

Answer 9

funny

Answer 10

excellent giggle.