2006-10-02 16:18:21 · 48 answers · asked by mikey wifey 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
She'll keep doing it until you move out.
2006-10-02 16:20:07 · answer #1 · answered by i luv teh fishes 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like there are some trust issues between you and mom. My guess is that either mom is unrealistically worried about you or she has a good reason to snoop (which isn't the best way to handle things either.)
Mom needs to let you be who you are in private. If that means you're hiding things and screwing up she needs to let you do that - otherwise she's parenting an adult. Why are you living at home? If you can move out this would be best, otherwise you need to be more realistic about what's going to be achievable. Also, you said 'still', if mom has been doing this she most likely won't change her behavior. She justifies it in some way. No, she shouldn't snoop, and no, she won't stop. Now you decide what you should do. :-)
2006-10-02 16:25:36 · answer #2 · answered by DanaZ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Mom's will be moms. Just try and keep private stuff hidden in places she can not look. IE if you are keeping a diary, keep it digitally, hidden places on your computer she wouldn't look. Destroy anything you never want her to find. You will not be able to keep a mother from snooping, and when you get older you will look back at it and realize she is just loves you and wants to know if she needs to worry or not. As long as you live under her roof you will have to deal with it, and the more you hide the more she will find.
2006-10-02 16:24:28 · answer #3 · answered by jasonb_77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here are some options:
1 - Move out (you could get a roommate to make it cheaper)
2 - Get a lockbox to keep your personal things in.
3 - Put a lock on the door.
4 - Leave a note asking her for privacy among your personal items, so that the next time she is snooping, she will see that you are aware of her behavior.
2006-10-02 16:20:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are in your 20s why are you still at home , are you a student or you came back home ? Cut the cord babe and get out there , she is gonna keep snooping as long as you are there , thats what moms do , much as you will if you ever get out of there and have your own kids
2006-10-02 16:22:52 · answer #5 · answered by rifraffxxx 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you can, move out. If you can't move out, talk this over with your mom and tell her how you feel. Ask her why she feels the need to snoop through your stuff - it indicates she doesn't trust you. Are there reasons for this?
2006-10-02 16:20:54 · answer #6 · answered by lovejam05 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is really lack of communication.
You need to ask your mom, at what age will she except that you have grown up. Give her a chance to answer that. See what she says. She may find she is stumped by it.
Then tell her that you consider yourself to be an adult and that you would like the both of you to talk about that.
What you need to do, is to give your mom peace of mind and an opportunity for her to realize that you have grown up. Because, your mom does not realize this. And until you can give her that peace of mind, the only way she feels some security that your doing ok, is to go through your things.
Communicate with her. Ask her what is might be worried about.
Sex, drugs, men etc. etc. Don't feel like you have to defend yourself with her, because you don't, your an adult. But, keep in mind that you need to help her feel like she does not need to worry.
P.s....she loves you!!! She is your mom!! make her feel like your safe, it's up to you.
2006-10-02 16:46:53 · answer #7 · answered by sweetcitywoman2002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does she take your stuff? She is just concerned about you. Maybe she is just cleaning your room. Be grateful that your mother is still alive and loves you. It may be annoying to you but some people would be very grateful to still have their mother alive and snooping through their stuff. Everything is relative.
I bet your mother is a very nice lady and loves you very much.
2006-10-02 16:25:09 · answer #8 · answered by Ducasse 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
1. Confront her and let her know how much this bothers you and violates your privacy as an adult. just because you live under her roof does not give her the right to have full access to your personal life.
2. move out.
3. if moving out is not an option, anything that you would rather her not find, lock it in a large trunk or drawer.
2006-10-02 16:38:38 · answer #9 · answered by Curiosity killed the cat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't afford to move out yet, then you shouldn't put stuff in there you don't want her to see. You can ask her to stop, but I'm sure you already have. I know my mom looked through my stuff when I was in high school, but I don't think she ever did after I graduated and if she ever did she never confronted me with any of it. You could play a joke on her and put something in there that would shock the crap out of her, like a huge vibrator! lol...j/k but it would be funny, espically if you could video her face when she found it!
2006-10-02 16:25:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would talk to her and tell her to cut it out. When I was younger, my mail used to come to my parent's house and my mom would open it with out my permission. I didn't like it. I told her to stop, and eventually had my mail forwarded somewhere else. As I look back on it now as a parent, I can see where she wanted insight into my life because I was unwilling to share it with her. Maybe if you were more open about things and kept the line of communication open, then she would cut it out. If you can't handle it anymore, then I would suggest moving out. Good luck.
2006-10-02 17:46:55 · answer #11 · answered by ally40ny 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋