OK we've been dating for 5 years, we just moved in together about 8 months ago. It's getting to the point where she drives me up the wall with almost everything she does and says. Are love life is non exsistant because she says that she is not comfortable with her self, and that's not helping much either. She gets mad because I spend alot of time hanging out with guys from work instead of her. What should i do stick it out or cut my losses and move on?
2006-10-02 13:34:11 · 14 answers · asked by Richard J 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Cut your losses and move on
2006-10-02 13:35:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've put a lot into this relationship so I don't know that cutting your losses and moving on is really a choice.
Have you spoken to your girlfriend about the things that 'drive you up the wall'? Maybe she doesn't realise she's being so irritating. There's always a period of adjustment with big changes like moving in together and she's just trying to find her way.
As to the love life issue, have you tried to help her improve her self esteem and confidence? Find out the real issue she has and try to fix it together. Not only will this bring you closer emotionally as you try to find a solution but hopefully you'll both be more satisfied in the bedroom.
Hope this helps, good luck.
2006-10-02 13:40:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
really look at whether or not she really is driving you up the wall with everything she says and does. did she move into your space?.. could be that it feels like she has taken over your space. hanging out with your guy friends all of the time is not going to help...and it may be a vicious circle, she might not feel comfortable with herself because you are hanging with the guys all the time and she may feel that you are not attracted to her anymore... how about making one night a week 'date night' and you plan something for her one nght a week... you may see a turn around. you guys have been together for a long time, it must be important enough for you to even be asking this question. talk to her. Best of luck!
2006-10-02 13:42:07 · answer #3 · answered by Caroline1505 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I find it hard to believe that after 5 years and just 8 months of living together that she is just starting to drive you crazy.lol. Its really a big step when you move in with someone. Its easy to go back to your own place to get away for a little so you can start missing that person. After 5 yrs of sleeping with you she is now comfortable. I dont think so she is using the sex against you. She wants you to be at home with her instead of hanging out with your boys. I know when youre home you argue. So its Damn if you do and Damn if you dont right. You havent cheated on her so you are doing a good thing. Its going to take sometimes to get use to the idea of living with someone. Give it sometime.Dont be so quick to want to walk away. We all have our faults so be patient. I am dealing with the same situation now. The only things that different is I dont go out with my co-worker. I am a homebody. I am allowing my man the room he needs. If it means going out with the guys fine.
2006-10-02 14:10:09 · answer #4 · answered by justturning40 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's frustrated and upset right now, I hope you try to comfort her a little at least. She wants someone to be there and be sympathetic to her, and you dumping her will not make her feel that way. She feels lonely. Truthfully, it's up to you, but it all depends on if you really care about her or not. If you don't, sure, do whatever and find a new hoe. But if you do, try to show your girlfriend of five years that she's still important to you, even though you've dated her for five years without getting married to her, and moved in with her which may slow down her marriage dream even more. It all depends on how you feel about her, not about how we feel about her.
2006-10-02 13:39:38 · answer #5 · answered by Jenny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe if you tried to hang out with her more instead of the guys for a while she would be more comfotable with herself.... I know it seems like alot of effort but maybe try and do something nice for her you know. Get her flower tell her shes pretty, etc.... small things that might make her feel better.
2006-10-02 13:38:09 · answer #6 · answered by rhodes727 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her that spending too much time together is driving you guys apart... so ask her for a break... make sure you tell her you dont want to break up!!! tell her that you need to see if she is really "THE ONE"... and then think about qhut you want well 5 years is alot... u might only need a break.... if you have tijme give some thinking to this situation... think on what u want for ur future and what she wants? because is you have totally different expectations... you might want to move on!!!
2006-10-02 13:38:55 · answer #7 · answered by katalyna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Moving in together is always the best test. It sounds like you both failed. Get out before it gets difficult to get out... it's obviously not a good match as far as long term, committed, living together-
2006-10-02 13:42:16 · answer #8 · answered by Recreantess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will realize that a relationship does consist of driving each other up the wall....it seems like you just need to take some time apart....not a separation.......just take a break...maybe a week or so.....what can it hurt...
2006-10-02 13:41:53 · answer #9 · answered by Mechelle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you still have some strong feelings for her, then spend more time with her than your friends and try to work it out.
If you have obviously fallen out of love with her, maybe it's time for you guys to split. Ultimately it all comes down to what you truly feel for her.
2006-10-02 13:40:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋