For two years now my friend fears the month of December (the first two weeks to be exact). This is not a little fear, but sheer terror. She cannot even listen to songs that she heard in December 2004 without going into a panic. In December 2004, she was dating a strange guy. He never hurt her physically or called her names, but he was very secretive and often spoke of others' suicide, rape and other bizarre topics. They dated for a year and then one day he disappeared in August 2005. Since then she has never been the same—she is not concerned with the guy, but has this intense fear and no known cause. I have known this girl (27 years old) for 9 years; she has never experienced anything like this. Have you any ideas what may be causing this horrific panic with the thought of December?
2006-10-02 12:07:24 · 9 answers · asked by ME 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Perhaps this guy said something that triggered a repressed memory in your friend. Coincidentally, maybe he made such statement in December, the same month that your friend had a traumatic experience, years ago.
However, unless he is some psychopath it seems highly unlikely that such benign verbal conversation could elicit such profound fear. Either she was abused more than she is telling you or perhaps she is transferring other emotions onto him and into these songs.
The interesting thing about happiness and sadness, love and hate—is that our emotional response is the same—what differs is our thought behind the feeling. Some of us are less equipped to gage or decipher the meaning of our feelings. Hate feels like love…sadness like joy…and often we deny them all together.
December is a very symbolic month, it is the end of a year…people reflect on their accomplishments or lack there of. December is a time for family holidays or judgment day to say the least. And the New Year marks a new beginning, which is just another guaranteed flop for those who are stuck in life.
Perhaps your friend was sad and feeling lost in December 2004. Maybe, this was a volatile point in her life. It is hard for people to admit to this confusion to themselves and others. As a result, the emotions manifest themselves in songs, smells and other like things. The irony is that because these feeling were never owned to begin with, when they do finally surface, they appear to be caused by a third party.
My final point was maybe the guy’s bazaar talk was triggering off ancient repressed feelings. In addition, maybe, it was just making her more aware of the hopelessness that she felt at that point in her life irregardless.
2006-10-04 22:50:47 · answer #1 · answered by LUCKY3 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's just associating that month with a bad event. Like when someone dies, every song I hear, every time that month comes around, I get that old feeling again, like being back in that moment.
Or it could be something this guy told her, one of his horrific stories of something that could have occurred at the beginning of the month.
Either way, I would suggest she see someone about it. She needs to figure out what exactly is causing that much fear in her. It might be something deep down that she's not aware of and won't be aware of without professional help.
I hope the best for your friend.
2006-10-02 12:14:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She could have some deep seated pains from the past that were brought up when this guy said all those horrible things to her and that time of year may be a reminder of all the things that may have happened. She needs to talk to a therapist about it to get it all out in the open so she can deal with it finally. I hope she seeks help hon.
2006-10-02 13:16:03 · answer #3 · answered by tigerlily_catmom 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most likely it's phsycological damage. Perhaps from a bad moment in your friend's young life. It might have been something real tragic such as a death of a sibling, etc. It can go as far as being supersticious and hating December alltogether.
2006-10-02 12:16:07 · answer #4 · answered by Mr. Cool 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Buried memories from childhood of Christmas? It can be a traumatic time for kids. If there were problems in the family they could have reached a peak just before Christmas culminating in some kind of fight that she has somehow suppressed the memories of - just an idea.
2006-10-02 12:17:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most people commit suicide in December because of the presents they feel they should buy. THE MONEY is the issue. Also, it is in the winter and causes SAD syndrome. Seasonal depression. - log-cabin-fever. Too cold to get out. The money issues are the biggest depressing thing though.
2006-10-02 14:38:41 · answer #6 · answered by Kitty L 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like a psychotic to me. Then again, Christmas time is very expensive and I sort of feel a bit of a panic coming on myself. I have a 8,7, and 4 year old. $$$$$$$$$
2006-10-02 12:15:34 · answer #7 · answered by rlw 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A bad past time, if it is real severe most Psych doctors would say it qualifies for PTSD. Talk to your friends about it. Sometimes talking with a well trusted friend can be a real big help! :)
2006-10-02 13:58:02 · answer #8 · answered by Golden Ivy 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
the insanity of the Holidays, especially if you are not a Christian like me and the holiday doesn't mean much to me
2006-10-03 20:09:52 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋