My son and a young lady had a short relationship last year and the girl was pregant, he had tried 3 times within one year for her to get a dna but she refused, making him think he was not the father because she was seeing another man, but she got government assitance and the state had him take a dna, so court ordered visitation to begin on October 1 and joint custody. We have had several (around 8) short visits to get the child accustomed to his new family before joint custody began with the child and mother, so anyway joint custody began yesterday and we had him a birthday party and they were suppose to bring him and leave him for the day but the grandmother shows up and would not leave him with us. We did have the party in about a hour because everyone was too upset to drag it out any longer and we had no conflict just told them we would contact our lawyer today, what do you think?? The child is 1 year old.
2006-10-02 10:44:52 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I said she was pregnant, I meant she got pregnant.
2006-10-02 10:51:36 · update #1
she did not give reason, except they wanted supervised visitation, also my cousin that is a high school teacher was here, my aunt who is well known and respected, the house is new and immaculate, my other daughter and husband, there is no reason except to be mean, we was not even going to leave the premises with him.
2006-10-02 10:56:09 · update #2
They had 6 weeks before joint custody began for him to get comfortable, we did have around 8 pleasant visitations with child and mom, then they would not cooperate with anymore for the past two weeks, then joint custody was to begin yesterday which all we wanted was a portion of the day and we had that verbal agreement but when she arrived she said no. Visitation is suppose to be joint and my son was to contact them in ample time for them to arrange, which he did. So we have contacted the lawyer.
2006-10-02 12:03:12 · update #3
I would just call my lawyer and let him/her handle the situation. Also the next time something like that comes up when the baby is dropped off I would make the comment like I will see you at 6 o'clock or tomorrow or I would just say okay thanks for bringing him he will be just fine see you later. Let them know that it is your time. Good Luck.
2006-10-02 10:56:37 · answer #1 · answered by shorty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The court gave the rules and everyone should stick to it. Have your lawyer talk to their lawyer about the situation. You and the family should not get into an argument about it or exchange comments. You did a great job at the party about not confronting her in front of people or upsetting the baby.Just go by the rules and always be polite and calm around the other family and the court and lawyers. You will win with good manners and confidence and love! My daughter has had trouble with her young ex-grandmother -in-law. The kid's dad and grandmother and grandfather don't say anything or visit the boys much but great gran wants to control everyone. She tried with me but she knows she will not win over me!She has given my daughter fits since the divorce. Just this summer, 8yrs later,my daughter kept the boys from her and finally laid down the law. Great gran finally got it!!! I hope your family has a quicker and easier time than we have had.Best wishes!
2006-10-02 11:37:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may find you need to set up a neutral pick up and drop off site. If you do that then the family members have no legitimate reason to show up in your home. Your mediator or attorney can assist you with changes to the visitation agreement.
Grandma was technically trespassing. You don't have to invite her into your house. If she refuses to leave the child with you, then she is violating the visitation order.
I can understand how you would not want to create a scene or bad feeling with grandma. I can also see how grandma is a bit nervous about leaving "her" baby with you as an unfamiliar person to her. Unfortunately you will have to assert your self some way or it will continue.
2006-10-02 10:57:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What do the court papers say? Do they state if the visitations are suppose to be supervised or un supervised? You need to go off the paper work.
With my son's dad, we had supervised for a certain amount of hours a week. He wanted to take him un supervised and my lawyer said that doing that will go against court papers. I would look over the papers. If it states nothing about being supervised, the grandma will need to leave off your property till your time is up.
2006-10-02 11:45:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't see how she can stay if the visitation is court ordered. I mean she did not have the right to be in your home and she did not have the right to supervise the visitation. I would most definitely contact your lawyer. The only one that can say whether the visitation is court ordered or not is the judge!
2006-10-02 12:22:19 · answer #5 · answered by jmlmmlmll 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same thing kind of happened with us. Well kinda. My brother is in jail, and in order to see my nephew, we had to go through the court because the mom wouldn't let us see him. It depends on what the court outlines. We had to have 1 month of visitation with mom present. Then the second month, we could have him for a few hours. And now we could pretty much pick him up whenever, as long as the mom consents, where the bare mininum is two Sundays a month.
So if they aren't following, you contact the court social worker who set up the visitation schedule, and they could end up in court again if they don't follow it.
2006-10-02 13:15:39 · answer #6 · answered by krivera_fierro 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stand up to grandma because she obviously has no respect for the law and is counting on all of you to back away with your tail between your legs.
If grandma supervises the visits and that was written into the court order (which you all did not mention), then grandma followed the law and you all are supposed to respect the law.
2006-10-02 10:53:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What are their reasons for not wanting to leave him? That sounds like a tough situation and a sad one!!! He has every right to his child, until he gives a reason not too!!! I would call your lawyer and fight for his rights. It is only fair to your son and the child!!! Good luck!!!
2006-10-02 10:51:01 · answer #8 · answered by housewives5 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like they are making up the rules as they go along...the Grandmother had no right to stay...Good idea contactiong your lawyer...Your son has rights to this child as well.
2006-10-02 12:20:26 · answer #9 · answered by mommy_2_liam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the court documents state that it is unsupervised then she needs to leave & if when confronted & asked politely to leave you can call the cops to report her. I would jsut call my lawyer now though & let him/her handle it.
2006-10-02 11:58:35 · answer #10 · answered by mamabens 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋