My two and a half year old keeps crawling up on our bed?

Question

My two and a half year old little boy will stay in his little "racecar" bed, which is right beside of ours(my husband and I), but like around 1:00am he will crawl up on our bed. My husband is thinking that we should buy a king size bed because he is the one who gets thrown to the edge and cannot sleep well. We have gone through this with our other oldest son, who is now six and a half, but he now sleeps by himself, well, he shares the same room with someone else, a cousin of mine who is 15. Should we let him sleep with us for a while until we think that he can manage to sleep alone in his bed? I know that the more that we let him sleep with us the harder it will be to get him out, but we feel sorry for him. Advice and suggestions please?

Answer 1

You need to ease the child out gradually, but soon. As you have stated, once the pattern is set, it will become that much harder to break. Discipline is needed now, firm but gentle, or the child will tend to assume that he can do what he wants as he grows older. My niece went through this, and while I will not say that was the ONLY factor in turning into "Little Miss Runs The House", it definitely set the stage for it.

On the other hand, many people think this is a natural thing to do, based on our own history of being hunter-gatherers that slept in family units for safety. (See link below). I still don't think I would let it go on indefinitely, but there is some merit in this view, as well. As for comfort -- yeah, go the bigger bed if you decide to let the child stay. I barely manage to stay comfortable with only my husband and me in ours!!

BTW, if the child is at all verbal, you might try ASKING him WHY he comes to bed. If there is a special reason, you may be able to solve it for him and solve the situation itself that way.

Good luck!

Answer 2

I would do what is right for you and your husband! In my opinion, every child is different and you need to take care of those needs differently. However just know that it is going to be that much harder once he is getting older and bigger to get him out of your bed. My advice would be to have him put back, being the cool racecar bed is right next to yours, into his own bed and even sleep with him there until h e falls back to sleep. Oh I remember these times well! I am concerned though that you have a 15 year old sleeping in with your six and a half year old? Even if they are in different beds, don't know your situation or your cousins, however at the teen years, he/she needs his/her own space! If it is temporary, short-term, that is different, but if not, then take a look at that situation. Maybe have the two brothers sleep in the same room together, and that will make the younger one feel secure! I know it worked for our oldest two boys! Good luck! Hang in there! Parenting is the hardest job in the world but when you keep working at it, and working with them, it is soooooooo rewarding!

Answer 3

I have the same problem with my son. As soon as he comes into the bedroom, I get up and take him back to his bed. I cover him up and pat his back for a minute. I figure if I allow him to sleep in the bed with my wife and I once, then he will think it is okay. I keep thinking he will get the hint soon, but this has been going on for a few months. Good Luck.

Answer 4

being a mom myself i went thru this myself first you definitley need to take control i felt bad also but its in the best intreset of your marriage you first should consider placing the boys in a room together and not throw out the cous. but may be put them another room you have to put him in his bed if you dont put him in a room seperate from yours then it will be more difficult but for now just place him in his bed let him know you are there but dont talk to him,everytime he gets in your bed put him back in his you may think when will i sleep or this will never work it will try it ,but again place him in his bed tell him he is a big boy encourage him he will realize mommy and daddy mean business and no dont punish him as that will only confuse him and make him more vonerable ,but honestly try to get him in another room and each night set by his bed side and move farther and farther away until then just continiosly place him in his bed he will catch on trust me
good luck i hope this helps it6 will but you must be consistent

Answer 5

I think perhaps some sort of divider between your bed and his, along with a nightlight might help. I wonder though, how can you and your husband enjoy intimacy with a child sleeping that close?

That is just as important to your family as the feelings of the child. Seperate yourselves and be sure to make time to ensure that your marriage receives as much attention as your parenting.

Answer 6

Your son needs to stay in his own bed in his own room. You and your husband need your privacy, and your child does not need to sleep next to you in order to feel safe. The key to keeping him in his own bed and room is consistancy. Return him to his bed without conversation time and time again, and eventually he will give up and retreat to his bed without getting up during the night. Don't get into bed with him to comfort him, and don't spend time talking to him, just put him into bed, and return to your own bed. Don't close the door...that way you can listen for him during the night, before he makes it all the way up on your bed.Good luck, be consistant for your son's sake, that way it will only take a short time.

Answer 7

You suggested that she is developmentally behind. My son has autism and develop into way behind a 2 years previous. He also had terrible nighttime terrors, and persisted to have them till he develop into almost 4. the advice given earlier is amazingly good suggestion for ordinary newborn. it may no longer paintings so properly for a newborn it quite is developmentally not on time. there's a reason they're said as particular needs little ones. 2 products of advice. attempt a fee ticket equipment. She receives one get away from mattress free card. truly make a card. enable her help in ornament it. Make it her own. Then clarify that she might want to in elementary words use the cardboard once, for any reason. Then she ought to get again in mattress and stay there. If each and every of the advice you receive does no longer paintings. Then there is one very last hotel, it quite is what we had to do. MELATONIN!! It develop right into a existence saver. it isn't a drug. that's all organic and has no undesirable area outcomes. It gently helps them nod off and stay that way. It resets the circadian rhythm it quite is what tells it it quite is is time to sleep. I swore through it. even as my son develop into six he develop into in a position to sleep on his own with none information. Sleep complications are familiar in little ones with disabilities, so evaluate this even as attempting to come back to a call what's ideal for your newborn.

Answer 8

Assuming that he shares a room with you and cannot get another is a matter of necessity, you need to stop that behavior NOW.

Do not allow him to get in your bed - period. If you let this become a regular habit, he will want to do it every night and will never stop without a fuss.

Tell him that he must stay in his own bed and that you will punish him for leaving it.

Answer 9

just gradually ease him out of it. He's only two. I personally slept in my parent's bed till I was 7 and my bro was 9 or 10.

....he's not that big. I think even a queen bed is ok to have.