Its my boyfriend's 50th birthday. I cannot afford to pay for 12 to eat at applebees but would like to have a small gathering for him there. How can I say it politely in an email invite?
2006-10-02 08:19:10 · 15 answers · asked by lil t 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
The reason we aren't having it at home (should have said this earlier) is he will have his roommate and her 5 yr old and 15 yr old there. While the room mate is welcome we would like a kid free night to celebrate. I have considered doing something at my place but I live a distance from most people we are inviting about 45 minutes. would asking them to drive and cooking at my place be the better option?
2006-10-02 09:27:06 · update #1
I'd make a joke of it. Like Hey We would love your company but unfortunately we have to start saving for retirement...if you would like to join us for drinks...come to...
2006-10-02 08:23:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you could say something like "first drink is on us" or "appetizers are on us" or maybe "come for birthday cake" and then provide the cake. If you are inviting guests, then you should pay for either the cake or some small thing at least. Otherwise, why have it at a restaurant? If you are inviting someone it is usually presumed that the host will provide for the guests. If you word it in the way I've stated above, then people know you are only providing certain things and they are expected to pay for the rest of the way. Other than that, I would either pare down your guest list or do something more affordable that enables you to pay for your guests.
2006-10-02 16:02:20 · answer #2 · answered by J.Z. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can't. If you're inviting people to a party, you cannot politely ask them to pay for themselves. You could try a VERY informal approach -- What you CAN do is say something like - Joe and I are going to dinner at Applebees on Friday. We're all going "dutch treat," but would be happy to get a bigger table if you want to join in. Let me know by Tuesday, and I'll save you a seat.
2006-10-02 15:30:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Come one, come all to the party. We're all getting together for a meal, everyone paying their own way." You don't need to go into why things are this way and finances, etc. Make sure the restaurant does separate checks for each group or party.
Perhaps you can afford to bring a cake or something similar that the restaurant agrees with - most are OK with this. Mention this on the invite if you can do this. In this way people will at least get something for attending, other than your lovely personality and presence. :o)
Good luck!
2006-10-02 15:27:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can tell people but be prepared.... cause what will you do if someone just stands up and leaves? Will you stop the celebration in order to ask them to give you some money?
I have tried such things, but at the end, I always had to pay for more than expected. Good luck.
2006-10-02 15:27:45 · answer #5 · answered by Graça 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I literally just hosted a 55th birthday party for my husband - at the end of the e-mail I wrote "Just so you all know I can't pay for 15 meals - so you are paying for your own dinner!" Everyone I invited were friends and everyone completly understood, it was a great night!
Happy Birthday to your boyfriend!
2006-10-02 15:28:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha. suggest to his friends that the 12 of you are treating him to a dinner celebration. if the 12 are close friends then it goes without saying they ought to treat and have a gathering since its his birthday!
You could have it at your house. its only 45 mins. and its a birthday celebration. u worry too much. Are u close friends with them? If u are then im sure they wont mind.
2006-10-04 12:07:08 · answer #7 · answered by Cat Commander 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your inviting close friends and/or family they should understand. I had a party of 22 for my mates 40th and everybody paid their own way. They didn't expect me to pay for it all. Although I did pay for 4 hotel rooms after dinner. We had a blast!!! Just tell them when you invite them.
2006-10-02 15:32:38 · answer #8 · answered by Blue Eyes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should just have it at your home because if you invite people out to dinner for a birthday, it is assumed that you're paying for it. Sorry I don't have the answer for you.
2006-10-02 16:06:20 · answer #9 · answered by Katyana 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Name the time and place then in small print maybe put dinner and drinks on your own expense. Put it after the RSVP date.
2006-10-02 15:28:25 · answer #10 · answered by aimstir31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋