ex keeps calling .. says to be friends . . after 4 months of nc she still keeps calling . . and has a bf?

Question

she broke up with me 6 months ago and she started dating this guy right after . . im talking like a week after . . but anyways i tried to get her back the first 2 months then i went NC since the middle of june. . .she has called or texted or left me a voicemail like 10-15 times since then and i havent answered or contacted her back. . .she just recently got into an official relationship with this guys and i noticed she tried to get ahold of me the day they started going out . . . she calls about once every 1,2,3 weeks and she called me drunk last weekend 3 times , 2 texts and 1 voicemail in 1 night and she said she doesnt understand why we cant be friends. . .even though ive told her atleast 20 times that i cant. . . after we broke up she insisted we were going to get back together sometime . . . and she also is the type of person that cant stand to be alone and always has to have somebody. . . if she is completely happy and everything then why does she try to call me

also we were together 2 1/2 years . . . when she started dating him she even admitted it was just because he was there and that she cant stand to be alone . . i just dont understand why is she calling me all of the time like this just to be friends when she knows we cant because ive told her 100 times. . does she want something else? also what i really want to know is its been 4 months since ive talked to her and she keeps calling . . . .if she just wanted to be friends wouldnt she get the clue by now that i cant b/c the way things ended

Answer 1

Hmm, some ex partners do like to remain friends because they are the caring kind of person, some like to remain friends so that should anything go wrong with the partner they are with now, they will have something to fall back on.

I will let you decide which category your ex falls in!

If you seriously do not want her to contact you then change your numbers, else stop whining and win her back already.

Answer 2

This is difficult. I am guessing that she regrets ending things with you and she sounds like she's co-dependent..and can't be alone. She hasn't let go of you yet. So why don't you help her out and just tell her to stop calling or you will change your number? Tell her you are not going to get back together with her. If you have to text or email this that way you don't have to talk to her. I think you are doing the right thing, but she's going to have to hear it from you...once again..that it's over!!
Besides you did date for a good while so it's probably hard for her to accept that you are no longer in her life! Good luck!!

Answer 3

WOW! Look how much time you are spending on someone who dumped you and is clearly dating someone else!

Take a minute a reread what you wrote... the details, the BS, the games.

Now ask yourself, is there value in the time spent on this? Is my lfe moving forward? Is my life moving at all?

Acknowledge to yourself that you obviously loved her. Acknowledge that she has moved on to another relationship. Acknowledge that you are now engaged in a self depleting game with this person.
Acknowledge that your time and life are worth more than wasted months, eventually years playing this game.

Now MOVE ON!

Step up, be a man and call her. Tell her you would like the calls and text messages to cease and desist IMMEDIATELY. And say goodbye. If it helps you can tell her you are no longer interested in the game. (and for the sake of it... understand that even if you EVER got back together with her there would be no trust and an endless myriad of games like this one). Once you have asked her to stop calling go on with life.

If she continues to harass you let her know you will contact the Police next (yes I am serous). If this does not stop her make the call... and think seriously of changing your phone numbers.

You asked why she tries to call you, and wonder if she is happy etc etc. Clearly the girl is not happy. Neither are you.

It's time to take a personal inventory of yourself and to stop spending your time looking at her. Ask yourself why you are not worthy enough to have a good loving relationship? Why are you constantly putting yourself in a situation that is detrimental to a productive, positive life? What are you scared of? Why won't you move on?

Reach down, grab your boys and getting going... this is a pathetic way to waste your life; and a way in which you will regret if you do not move on.

Good luck! Depend on yourself to get past this, it's the only way your self confidence will grow.

Answer 4

Just keep ignoring her calls, besides she broke up with you. And that's what she gets. She must have not known that you were actually good to her until she got into another relationship and that's great. Let her be miserable now. She doesn't want to be friends, she wants to have sex and trap you into a relationship so you guys can be together again.

Answer 5

I personaly don't think an ex-couple can be friends again after. I think she may still have feelings for you and want you back. I don't know what to say to get her off your back though. Maybe get a girlfriend and one of the times she calls you, tell her you have one and you guys can't be friends.

Answer 6

Okay, here is the deal. If you stay away from her
for a certain amount of time that qualifies as a
legit separation. She is trying to foil that time period
by having contact with you, and saying tht you are
trying to reconcile your differences. Stay away from
her and the separation period remains untainted, viable
in court.

Don't mess it up.

Answer 7

If you don't want to hear from her, change your number. Does a part of you like how she's trying to contact you all the time? If you are over it, change the number and move on b/c you are right, she needs someone to constantly make her feel better about herself.

Answer 8

I don't think she is the type of girl you can date. She is really up to something. so, my advice to you is to forget about her and move on with your life. There comes a time in a man's life when he has to take a tough decision. the time has come for you now so do just that.

Answer 9

I do not know . My boy friends ex.After three and a-half years still calls. but he is dumb enough to answer. How stupid am I?I have been with him almost two years. They always want what they can't have. They love the fact they still can push your buttons.Believe it or not they love to be in control. Even ehen they can't control their own lives,usually because they can't control their own lives.

Answer 10

She's a player,u r better off w/out her,ur relationship ended,she jumped in2 da other relationship straight away,didnt take her long did it?jus 4get her mate.U gonna end up getting hurt.Move on wid ur life.