This goes back for sometime now. Its court ordered he gets to see her. He drinks and drives her on a regular basis when she is with him. I have called DCFS on 2 occasions, they said unless he gets in a wreck or gets caught, nothing they can do. I took her to counciling and her councilor called DCFS and they told her same thing. I talked to school councilor about this and they also said same thing. The last incident that happened when she was there he took her driving and he was in passenger seat drinking a beer as she drove. (she is 15 ) He lives 2 hours away so Im not there to "follow" and call police. What do I do?
2006-10-01 23:37:12 · 13 answers · asked by nnett64 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Get your daughter a cell phone, Next time he drinks and either drives or has her drive have her call you, use some kind of code so he doesn't know what is being said have her say "how is grandma" or "did so and so call". Then call the police and tell them. This would be ideal if it happened when he was bringing her home b/c then you could possibly witness it like if they were their waiting on him, or caught him in your town. That way you could get her from him. It would also be easy for you to get a police report to give to whoever you call, attorney to get visitation changed, Children's Services to get him investigated, etc. Also might get him the help he needs so he can be a good dad.
2006-10-02 00:09:48 · answer #1 · answered by channielynn 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are right there is not much you can do. But you tell him when he comes to pick up, that you will not allow her to get into the car with him. He will probably get angry, and you can call the police and explain why you will not allow your daughter to go with him. If he has been drinking the police will know, alcohol reeks, so maybe then they will either shoo him off or arrested for drinking and driving. That would be he way I would deal with this. Just make sure you can smell alcohol on him. Don't give up trying to protect your daughter, do what you have to do. In most accidents that a drunk is driving usually the person that is drunk doesn't get hurt because his body is limber, but the others either die or get badly hurt. Think about that for a while. Good luck.
2006-10-02 00:09:04 · answer #2 · answered by Boricua Born 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to have conversation with your daughter.
If she doesn't have her permit, have her get one. Tell her that people do not let drunk people drive them anywhere. If she doesn't have her permit and cannot legally drive him then she doesn't get in the car when he has been drinking. Otherwise, teach her how to gain some skill driving or pay a driving school for lessons and have her drive him. If she must ride in the car and he is drunk, she needs to be buckled up in the BACK SEAT. Or she can call you. Go get her once. And then stop sending her for visitation utill you can get everything in place for her.
Explain to her that this rule does not just apply to her father. You never get in any car if the driver is under the influence of anything. You can keep her home until she gets her permit and you are assured of her safety. And that she is driving legally. She will need to be added to his insurance at no cost when she gets her permit. If he takes you to court, explain the situation to the court. You are not denying him visitation, you are ensuring your child's safety. When everything is in place, she can visit.
This is going to fall on your daughter. She is growing up and is going to be making adult decisions. This is a good situation for her to begin. So, mom, take a deep breath, teach your child, give her the tools she needs, and just hang in there.
2006-10-02 00:32:48 · answer #3 · answered by Sunbaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When he comes to see her next, suggest he brings a mate who can drive and is not drunk. Is he an alchoholic? Because from what you have said, he sounds it. Get him to visit alcoholics annonymous. Also, try and get a court appeal. Give her a phone. Keep on at the DCFS, and they will soon do something. Keeping daughter and father away from eachother is something you could regret, so try not to do that.
2006-10-02 02:11:14 · answer #4 · answered by gr_bateman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
show your daughter some film or an advert of a motor accident when people drink drive,,it could be her and her dad but as you say,,you have little control and it stinks,,take her to the local police station and let someone there tell her about what happens to drink drivers and those who lose loved ones through it,,tough times need tough measures..i feel for you.
2006-10-02 00:21:55 · answer #5 · answered by lex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sadly, there's little you can do. It's horrible to think the authorities would rather wait for a disaster to happen then act, than to prevent the disaster alltogether!
I would suggest you tell your daughter to call a cab whenever your ex has been drinking. It's quite expensive, I know, but it's better to be safe than sorry!
Good luck!
2006-10-02 01:49:36 · answer #6 · answered by Dahv Inchi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must take a seat his a$$ down and feature a SERIOUS dialogue approximately this!!! If that does not paintings take him again to court docket for FULL custody, no longer when you consider that he will not see the youngsters, however when you consider that he would kill them! For a few rationale this appears like some thing my ex might have performed and simply the act of taking him again to court docket for some thing like that might have scared the bejesus out of him. If he is something like my ex he might straighten proper out. If no longer, and also you do must take custody away, a minimum of you understand your munchkins are nontoxic!
2016-08-29 09:20:03 · answer #7 · answered by stults 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should follow him when your daughter is with him. You know that how dangerous a person can be when he is drunk so if you love your daughter than follow him or straight way tell him that if he wants to meet your daughter then he should not drink on that particular day.
2006-10-02 01:35:49 · answer #8 · answered by crazychori 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get your daughter a cell phone and instruct her to call you if this happens again. Then you need to call 911 and report a drunken driver and give info as to which road/highway he is on.
2006-10-02 00:23:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Catch him in the act then nail him on it. If he has a cell phone or some way to get a hold of him on the road...call him and then call the cops if you have any concern.
2006-10-01 23:48:11 · answer #10 · answered by SquirrelBait 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋