She is driving me nuts... I will be firm with her and I don't give her things when she is hysterical and crying for them. She just crys and crys and crys... I try to redirect her attention. I try to put her in a spot untill she can calm down ( stays but continues to cry). She is very very clingy to me (to the point where I have to pry her little hands out of my hair), I am a stay at home mother with her so she sees me all day everyday almost. She goes to play groups just fine without my presents there and doesn't have a fit so I know its nothing to do with seperation. I will say what I want her to say to me. If she is happy at that moment she will repeat it to me but if not she just crys like I am asking the world of her. What more can I get her to stop crying so much.
She is not like this to her dad... just me.
2006-10-01 14:12:58 · 15 answers · asked by erinjl123456 6 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
This is my 3rd child... and I didn't have this issue with the first two.
2006-10-01 14:20:43 · update #1
Once you are certain there is really nothing wrong-put your face near hers and tell her firmly, "I understand you are upset, but there is nothing I can do until you tell me what it is you need/want me to do. I am going to leave the room because your crying upsets me." Then leave the room. When she follows you (and she likely will), let her know it is okay for her to cry, just that she can't continue to do it in the same room you are in, reminding her of your desire for her to TELL YOU what is wrong. My experience with my own son at that age leads me to believe she is simply seeking the attention crying incessantly gets her. You may need to do this more than once, but I'd bet she'll stop when she figures out she'll get more attention not crying.
2006-10-01 14:28:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as though you are putting too much pressure on her . Something is wrong when a 2 year old baby cries that much . I pick up that you are almost putting her on your level by insisting she repeat back to you whatever you say to her & the thing where you say you are "firm"...how firm does one need to be with a baby ? She's fine away from you -so , that should be an indication to lighten up .Sometimes young parents with a first child can loose sight of the fact that a baby is still a baby ( or toddler ) at age 2 . They are not on an adult level ; nor can they verbalize what is bothering them . Maybe to a 2 year old - you are asking the world of her . Be sure that you have outside interests , so that you aren't focusing all your energy in 'being firm ". Also-if you are uptight , the child will pick up on it ; and that could be another determining factor in her behavior . Some children are naturally slower than others in talking; I wouldn't worry too much at age 2 . If you are worried , talk to her pediatrician .
2006-10-01 21:29:31 · answer #2 · answered by missmayzie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had this very same problem,I am also a stay at home mom,and I prayed for the day she would stop crying,only it wasnt just crying,Aria shrilled to the top of her lungs,enough to literally pierce my ears! I couldnt wait for her to start talking about her feelings rather than screaming.I just done my best to talk to her every time this happened and tried to be consistent,and everyday hoped that was the day she wouldnt scream.I guess its just a period of time and a stage they go through because this didnt stop until she was around 2 years and 7 months,and every once in a while,she doesnt scream,but still cries,its just a matter of time this is a hard age where they go through not being a baby but not a big girl either.Just try and be patient,and be consistent.I hope this helped somehow
2006-10-01 21:44:47 · answer #3 · answered by luv2bawifenmom 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well my advice to you is try sitting her down in a chair and coming down to her level like sitting on the floor beside her and ask whats wrong and say u need to tell mommy whats wrong and if she dont answer then ask her stuff like are u hurt or did somebody hurt u and if that don't work then you should use a little force and tell her if she does not stop crying ur gonna make her take a nap and follow threw with it if she dont. Another thing i would try is if she keeps crying just stay relaxed and clam with her and pick her up and just rock her and rub her back and tell her to cry it out and that it dont bother u and its ok to let it out more then likely she will fall asleep. If you want her to use her words more then try when she is in a good mood ask her things and get her to talk like asking her whats that or reading a story to her and letting her see the dogs or people in the book and ask her how she liked the book and when you do catch her in a good mood talk to her and tell her that she should not cry if she wants something that she should just tell u and then say big girls dont cry if they want something and tell her they ask for it politely and then show her how.
2006-10-02 00:05:42 · answer #4 · answered by Amanda 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this has worked for me. my son is 25 months old. I speak to him calmly. I hug him. I ask him what is wrong. I tell him I dont approve of the yelling. I hug him and whisper in his ear " be a good boy"
this works on average 8 outta 10 times... the rest of time if he is really acting up screaming and yelling.. I ignore him. Totally ignore him. Put him in his crib, keep him confined and let him cry. I check ever five minute to wipe his nose but no love and affective until he calm. Once he is calm he wants to hug mama. Then we talk about what just happen. If the tantrum is in public.. I leave and have him cry all the way home.
2006-10-01 22:50:57 · answer #5 · answered by smilingontime 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By giving her attention with every time she cries, you are reinforcing this behaviour. Try the opposite. Ignore her every time she cries (unless she cries for real reasons like a fall) and she will learn that her behaviour does not get rewarded. My 2 year old son is starting to grasp the concept and it is actually working quite well. Good luck!
2006-10-01 21:19:08 · answer #6 · answered by q127 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Explain to her that she is a big girl and she can talk and ask for what she wants.
Then follow through by NOT responding to her when she cries. Soon she will learn she has to use words. This will be tougher on you than it is on her. But I see it as the only way to show her that you mean what you say.
If she thinks she can get what she wants by crying - she will keep crying
2006-10-01 21:23:31 · answer #7 · answered by helpme1 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Stimulating Speech and Language in Young Children
If you have young children living with you or visiting you frequently, you may want to help them develop good speech and language. There are many ways to stimulate speech and language development in young children. These techniques can be used informally during play, on family outings and in casual conversation. Use these techniques to provide a model for the child rather than asking the child to repeat or imitate what you say.
Feedback:
Repeat what the child says, but say it correctly.
Child:
Nanna shoe all wet.
Adult:
Oh, Nanna's shoe is all wet!
Child:
Him falled down.
Adult:
He fell down.
Expansion:
Repeat what the child says and add a little more.
Child:
Her eat ice cream.
Adult:
She is eating a big ice cream cone. It looks good!
Child:
Doggy!
Adult:
A big, black doggy!
Self-Talk:
Talk about what you are doing. Children learn language by hearing it.
Adult:
I am watering my flowers. They need water to grow.
Parallel-Talk:
Talk about what the child is doing or may be thinking.
Adult:
You are putting a pretty dress on your doll.
Your dolly has so many pretty clothes.
Past Talk:
Talk about what has just happened.
Adult:
Uh oh, your tower fell down.
You built a big tower with your blocks!
Naming:
Say the names of things and actions. Point to objects. This is very easy to do with picture books.
Adult:
I see a big red apple.
And here are some green grapes. What do you see?
This boy is running fast. Tell me about the girl.
General Suggestions:
Tune in to what the child is interested in and what he or she wants to talk about.
Ask open-ended questions:
Okay
How was school today?
What is this? (dog)
What is the boy doing?
Better
What happened at school today?
Tell me about the dog.
What is happening?
Reinforce new responses.
E.g.: You said a new word; that's great!
Good talking. You can say so many words.
Read aloud to the child. The close, nurturing relationship established during reading aloud helps the child develop a love of reading as he learns to read himself. There is an excellent book written on this subject, The Read-Aloud Handbook by Jim Trelease.
Keep talking fun and don't pressure the child to talk or repeat what you say.
2006-10-01 21:18:28 · answer #8 · answered by amber ɹəqɯɐ 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You might want to get her tested for autism..could be a sign of it..my son did the same thing when he was little and we found out he has autism ( he's very mild)
2006-10-01 22:32:06 · answer #9 · answered by baby shih tzu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She knows your weakness. Children are very good at picking up on this, it's a survival instinct. Don't force her to speak. Girls are better at this than boys. Just relax. Soon you'll be trying to get her to be quieter.
2006-10-01 21:18:44 · answer #10 · answered by CHEYENNE 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋