should i be upset that i found them or happy that he is using protection. i know what age we are in but i was hoping and keeping hope alive that he would have waited considering he told me that he hadnt had sex yet with his girlfriend of two years. at least he told me it was his and not blame it on his cousins this time. as a mother i worry about him becoming a father or getting a disease. so my question again is should i be upset at the fact that he started having sex so soon, there is really nothing i can do except tell him again the dangers of aids, getting ol girl pregnant and stds, not like i didnt before. true i was young when i had sex, but i was raped first.
2006-10-01 13:35:20 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Happy that he's using protection, angry that he harming his health by having sex.
Depending on how long he has been sexually active, he may be damaging his immune system. Testicle cancer in the #1 form of cancer in male age 15-35 and shows up the most in males who were sexually active as teenagers. Treatment involves removing the affect testicle(s) followed by radiation treatment, but only if caught early. Caught late and to migrate to the brain and lungs. He slowly goes insane as his lung fill with fluid and he drowns in his own fluids.
It is not a venereal disease, just one of the millions of viruses we all carry, but have an immunity to. The sexual activity doesn't guarantee he will get it, any more than smoking guarantees you will get lung cancer. But get it and he could become a Eunuch.
Remind him that males are not adults as age 18. Christ was not mature enough to be on his own until he was 30, unless he sure he's better than Christ.
Males are declared adults only because they can be drafted. They are drafted because their brains are not developed enough to resist the manipulation it takes to overcome any reservations about killing someone. It has only been six years since he began developing conceptual thought process, or understanding why something is. It is also the time when the male body reaches its peak efficient use of oxygen and energy.
I know he is not going to like hearing any of this, but he needs to know it. He also needs to know that sex is a a function of being an adult. If he thinks he's mature enough to be an adult, that it is time for the responsibilities of being an adult, such as paying rent, utilities, food, and his own clothes.
Buy him the book, "10 Stupid Things Men Do To Mess Up Their Live."
Click on my image and go to my Yahoo 360 page. You will find a pie chart there that will help you. Right click on it and save it to your computer for printing.
2006-10-01 13:38:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 7⤋
Relax, Mom, at least he has the sense to have condoms. Plus, he is 18, and an adult. He only told you he wasn't having sex, because that's what you wanted to hear. Open up to him, and listen, and MAYBE he will again do the same with you. As to stds, aids, etc, what kind of girlfriend do you think he has??? And I'm sorry about your being raped at an early age. It does seems like you did, however, teach your son the rights and wrongs in all things in life. (aside from a little white fib about his sexual activity, which most kids do with their parents). Good luck, and somewhere down the road, will you gain a daughter-in-law, or lose a son?
2006-10-01 13:52:05 · answer #2 · answered by greg j. 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Eighteen is not so young, if you compare that to other people's starting age. Besides, if he's using protection, you should be happy, not worried. This shows you did a good job on him. Now, you have just to sit down and enjoy the good man you've raised.
And one more thing. I was an 18-year-old boy, too. And not SO long ago, either. I would have hated my mother asking me questions about my sex life. Please spare them to your son. He seems to know what he's doing. Especially don't have him make promises he can't keep, like having a girlfriend for two years, and not having sex...
2006-10-01 13:54:08 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's 18, first of all - legally he's an adult. Why be upset? It's a waste of energy that just going to make you both miserable. You should be happy he's responsible and not getting HIV or getting someone pregnant. He's grown up enough now that he's admitted to you that the condoms are his. I don't believe the "I haven't had sex with my girlfriend of 2 years" for one second, but he's just probably embarrassed to say that to his mother.
And, you know, now that he's an adult, perhaps you should think twice about going through his drawrs. Put his laundry on his bed and make him put it away from now on.
Good luck!
2006-10-01 14:17:13 · answer #4 · answered by Nightlight 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your son is 18. You should be proud of him for thinking about protection. Condoms can save his life. I would say he is acting mature and responsibly. Maybe, I am wrong but 18 for a guy should be a very normal time to begin having sex, if he has not already. Talk to him, ask him. My son is 13 and I have been preaching condoms to him for over a year already. Teenagers have raging hormones and they will invariably experiment with sex. Rape is not sex, it is an act of violence. It happened to me too when I was in my 20's. I was not a virgin, but it devastated me for a long time. Do not associate that violence perpetrated on you with your sons normal curiosity. Talk to him, find out his feelings.
2006-10-01 13:52:11 · answer #5 · answered by Gorgeoustxwoman2013 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should be happy. It is not your business what he is doing at 18 and you should not have been looking through his drawers. His sex life is none of your concern. Any logical smart parent knows that kids are having sex way younger than that these days and that they should just learn to wear protection and take birth control. You can't stop him anyway. I'm sorry of your having been raped though.
2006-10-01 13:45:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
My grand mother was married at thirteen. In the beginning of the last century in New York,
Teens always had sex. the only difference is today's life span. So face it the condoms are a good sign but make sure he knows to respect his partner's wishes.
Tammi Dee
2006-10-01 13:43:08 · answer #7 · answered by tammidee10 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should be happy that he's using protection. It sounds like you did your job of letting him know the dangers of sexual activity and that's great. He's an adult now though so all you can do now is try and keep an open and honest relationship with him.
2006-10-01 13:43:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
whoah on your last statement, sorry to hear that although not excactly an excuse for having sex at a young age. I'm sorry though. But to answer your question....be happy he is using protection. He is 18, trust me he probably started much younger. Just make sure he knows the risks cause it's too late to stop him now. He probably smokes too...check it out.
2006-10-01 13:39:23 · answer #9 · answered by heatherlynnmorrow 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is 18 years old, what are you doing in his drawer? Be happy that he is being responsible and ask him to forgive your prying. But also, as a mom I know that I would be concerned, you could be up front with him and make sure that he really knows the facts of life and that although you may not approve, you want to know that he is aware of all the ramifications. Tough talk but you are a mom and it's your job. But please, stay out of the kids drawer.
2006-10-01 13:42:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
If he has waited until 18, I say good for him. He is using condoms, he is obviously not an idiot and has some knowledge about sex and the hazards.
He's not a baby, he is a young adult, give him a break!
Blessings )O(
2006-10-01 13:40:05 · answer #11 · answered by Epona Willow 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋