Yo mamma jokes?

Question

I need good yo mamma jokes me and my friend are having a contest...

Answer 1

Yo mama's so old, her memory is in black and white.
Yo mama's so old, I told her to act her age and the ***** died.

Yo mama's so old, she DJ'd at the Boston Tea Party.
Yo mama's so old, she drove a chariot to high school.
Yo mama's so old, she has a Jesus Starter jacket.
Yo mama's so old, she has all the apostles in her black book.
Yo mama's so old, she needed a walker when Jesus was still in diapers.
Yo mama's so old, she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp.
Yo mama's so old, she took her drivers test on a dinosaur.
Yo mama's so old, she used to baby-sit Yoda.
Yo mama's so old, she used to gang bang with the Flintstone's.
Yo mama's so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.

Answer 2

Yo mama so ugly she went into a haunted house and walked out with a job application!

Answer 3

Yo mamma so old, she sat behind Jesus in 3rd grade.

Answer 4

Yo mama's so ugly she mad a onion cry!!!!

Answer 5

you mama's so fat she steped on the scale and she said "oh thats just some of my freinds phone numbers",

Answer 6

LMAO!

i think she ^ gave u all the jokes u need!☻

Answer 7

i would answer this but u know who stole all my answers. thanks amber!

Answer 8

Yo momma is so stupid she thought her genes were Levi's.
Yo momma is so poor when i stomped her cigarette, she said hey that's my heater!
Yo momma is so stupid she studied for a drug test.
Yo momma is so fat her shadow weighs 1,000 pounds.
Yo momma is so stupid, when i asked her for some lemonade, she squeezed a lemon on a band aid.
Yo momma is so fat she falls in space.
Yo momma is so fat she sat on steel and made foil.
Yo momma is so stupid, when i told her that trees make air,she discected a tree to find the lungs.
Yo momma is so stupid, she puts mayo on asprin.
yo momma is so fat she play's hopskotch like this;San Diego, Los angeles, san fransico, seattle, vancouver.
Yo momma is so fat her blood cells are chunks of cement
yo mamma so fat she dont got jelly roles she got speed bumps
yo mamma so ugly she makes blind kids cry
yomamma so old she original on thats 70's show
yo mamma so ugly they make u look at her on fear factor
yo mamma so stupid i flash a flashlight at night she said i didnt know the sun goes up this late
YO MAMA SO STUPID SHE STARED AT THE ORANGE JUICE JUST BECAUSE IT SAID CONCENTRATE
YO MAMA SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED IN THE OCEAN THE WHALES STARTED TO SING ''WE ARE FAMILY,EVEN THOUGH YOU BIGGA THAN ME''
YO MAMA SO BLACK SHE STOOD UP TO A WHITE WALL AND PEOPLE
GO ''THERE'S THE BLACK HALLWAY
YO MAMA SO UGLY SHE GIVES FREDDY KRUGER NGHTMARES
YO MAMA SO UGLY PEOPLE DRESS UP LIKE HER FOR HALLOWEEN
YO MAMA SO FAT WHEN HER BEEPER GOES OFF PEOPLE THINK SHES BACKIN UP
YO MAMA SO FAT SHE HAD TO GO TO SEAWORLD TO GET BAPTIZED
YO MAMA SO FAT WHEN SHE WEARS A YELLOW RAINCOAT PEOPLE YELL TAXI
YO MAMA SO FAT SHE HAS TO PUT LIPSTICK ON WITH A PAINTROLLER
YO MAMA SO FAT SHE HAS TO PULL DOWN HER PANTS JUST TO GET IN HER POCKETS
YO MAMA SO FAT SHE FELL AND COULDN'T GET UP
YO MAMA SO FAT SHE WENT BUNGEE JUMPIN AND TOOK DOWN THE BRIDGE
YO MAMA SO FAT SHE FELL IN LOVE AND BROKE IT
YO MAMA SO FAT SHE STEPS ON A SCALE AND IT SAYS TO BE CONTINUED
YO MAMA SO FAT SHE STEPS ON A SCALE AND IT SAYS ONE AT A TIME
yo momma's so ugly that we had to tie a t-bone steak around her just to get the dogs to play with heR
yo moma's so fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles poped out
ur momma soo black it look she bathed in charcoal
ur momma soo stupid she went asleep wit a ruler 2 c how long she slept 4
ur momma soo ugly that is why there are starting a new show pimp my face
i saw ur momma carryin a matress on her back. I said where are you going and she said "to worK".
Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, No Professionals."
Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.
Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yes, let's go bury it."
Yo momma so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.
Yo momma so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry.
Yo momma so ugly she is very successful at her job: Being a scarecrow.
Yo momma so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.
YOU MAMA SO STUPID I TOLD HER TO DO THE ROBOT AND KNOW R2D2 HAS ADDS
Yo momma so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras.
Yo momma so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say ,"Damn, is it Halloween already?"
Yo momma so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Yo momma so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.
Yo momma so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
Yo momma so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours...for a quote!
Yo momma so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!
Yo momma so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her!
Yo momma so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone!
Yo momma so ugly she turned Medusa to stone!
Yo momma so ugly, she walked into taco bell and they all ran for the border!
Yo momma so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her.
Yo momma so ugly she scares the roaches away.
Yo momma so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye
Yo momma so short she gotta slam-dunk her bus fare!
Yo momma so short you can see her feet on her drivers lisence!
Yo momma so short, she models for trophys.
Yo Momma so short that she has to hold up a sign that says, "Dont Spit! I Cant Swim!"
Yo Momma so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, and she said, "Moving."
Yo Momma so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers!
Yo Momma so poor when I ring the doorbell she says, "DING!"
Yo Momma so poor her face is on the front of a food stamp.
Yo Momma is so poor when she heard about the last supper she thought she had ran out of food stamps.
Yo Momma so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin'?" She said, "Buying luggage."
Yo Momma so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning.
Yo Momma so poor you put RoundUp on the weeds and she said, "There goes breakfast, lunch, and dinner!"
Yo Momma so poor you asked her where the facilities were, and she said, "Pick a corner, any corner."
Yo Momma so poor I walked into your house and 3 roaches tripped me & tried to take my wallet!
Do you know the story about the little old woman that lives in a shoe? Well, Yo mama so poor she live in a flip flop!
Yo momma so old, she has Jesus' beeper number!
Yo momma so old, her social security number is 1!
Yo momma so old, she older than yo grandma!
Yo momma so old that when God said let the be light, she hit the switch!
Yo momma so old that when she was in school, there was no history class.
Yo momma so old, she owes Jesus 3 bucks!
Yo momma so old she's in Jesus's yearbook!
Yo momma so old her birth certificate says expired on it.
Yo momma so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
Yo momma so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
Yo momma so old she ran track with dinosaurs.
Yo momma so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.
Yo momma so old she sat behind Jesus in the third grade.
Yo momma so old even God calls her mother!
Yo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl.
Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
Yo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
Yo momma so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!
Yo momma so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!
Yo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
Yo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
Yo momma so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put, "O.K."
Yo momma so stupid she stole free bread.
Yo momma so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners.
Yo momma so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
Yo momma so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends.
Yo momma so stupid she told everyone that she was, "Illegitiment" because she couldn't read.
Yo momma so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind.
Yo momma so stupid she asked you, "What is the number for 911?"
Yo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
Yo momma so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl.
Yo momma so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own back.
Yo momma so stupid when asked on an application, "Sex?" she marked, "M, F and sometimes Wednesday too."
Yo momma so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the ocean!
Yo momma so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead.
Yo momma so stupid that under, "Education," on her job application, she put, "Hooked on Phonics."
Yo momma so stupid was born on Independence Day and can't remember her birthday.
Yo momma so stupid, she couldn't read an audio book.
Yo momma so stupid she stands up on an empty bus.
Yo momma so stupid she has to ask for help to use hamburger helper .
Yo momma so stupid she went to Disney World and saw a sign that said "Disney World - Left" so she went home.
Yo momma so stupid she asked me what kind of jeans I had on and I said, "Guess" so she said, "Levi's."
Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!
Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!! "
Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!
Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled, "HEY, KOOL-AID!"
Yo momma is so fat her waist size is equator!
Yo momma so fat she went bungee jumping and went strait to hell!
Yo momma so fat when she walks around in Texas in high heels, she strikes oil!
Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!
Yo momma so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he told her to move her fat ole *** over!
Yo momma so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!
Yo momma so fat she wakes up in sections!
Yo momma so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!
Yo momma so fat she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phone book!
Yo momma so fat we're in her right now.
Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise.
Yo momma so fat, she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors.
Yo momma so fat she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the new world.
Yo momma so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling, "Free Willy!"
Yo momma so fat, she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says, "Okay!"
Yo momma so fat, she got to iron her pants on the driveway.
Yo momma so fat the highway patrol made her wear, "Caution! Wide Turn."
Yo momma so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!
Yo momma so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!
Yo momma so fat she's got her own area code!
Yo momma so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!
Yo momma so fat, whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
Yo momma so fat she was mistaken for God's bowling ball!
Yo momma so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!
Yo momma so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!
Yo momma so fat she uses a pillow case as a sock.
Yo momma so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!
Yo momma so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping
Yo momma so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.
Yo momma so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.
Yo momma so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.
Yo momma so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.
Yo momma so fat when the ***** goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.
Yo momma so fat that she can't tie her own shoes.
Yo momma so fat sets off car alarms when she runs.
Yo momma so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth.
Yo momma so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.
Yo momma so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"
Yo momma so fat to her, "light food," means under 4 Tons!
Yo momma so fat she went on a date with high heels on and came back with sandals!
Yo momma so fat and stupid, her waist size is larger than her IQ!
Yo momma so fat she was zoned for commercial development.
Yo momma so fat she has her own brand of jeans: FA - FatAss Jeans.
Yo mommas teeth are so yellow, I can't believe its not butter.
Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.
Yo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!
Yo mama so fat she got hit by a parked car!
Yo mama so fat when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her back!
Yo mama so fat her college graduation picture was an airial.
Yo mama so fat she lays on the beach and greenpeace tried to push her back in the water
Yo mama so fat she broke her leg and gravy poured out
Yo mama so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth
Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures
Yo mama so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard.
Yo mama so fat she sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington's nose.
Yo mama so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.
Yo mama so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.
Yo mama so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.....
Yo mama so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, she caused an eclipse.
Yo mama so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl.
Yo mama so fat she was baptised in the ocean.
Yo mama so fat she has to iron her clothes in the driveway.
Yo mama so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.
Yo mama so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"
Yo mama so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!
Yo mama so fat that when whe was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
Yo mama so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet.
Yo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes
Yo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends
Yo mama so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon
Yo mama so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read
Yo mama so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind
Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
Yo mama so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
Yo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!
Yo mama so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
Yo mama so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!
Yo mama so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!
Yo mama so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
Yo mama so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
Yo mama so stupid she took a cup to see Juice.
Yo mama so stupid that she sold the car for gas money.
Yo mama so stupid she asked you "What is the number for 911"
Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
Yo mama so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."
Yo mama so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.
Yo mama so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl.
Yo mama so stupid she called Dan Quayle for a spell check.
Yo mama so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own back.
Yo mama so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners.
Yo mama so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.
Yo mama so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
Yo mama so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the ocean!
Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
Yo mama so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!
Yo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
Yo mama so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
Yo mama so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home.
Yo mama so stupid that under "Education" on her job apllication, she put "Hooked on Phonics."
Yo mama so stupid she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.
Yo mama so stupid she put lipstick on her forehead, talking about she was trying to makeup her mind.
Yo mama so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!
Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco!
Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her
Yo mama so nasty she made speed stick slow down.
Yo mama so nasty she brings crabs to the beach.
Yo mama so nasty she made right guard turn left.
Yo mama so nasty the fishery be paying her to leave
Yo mama so nasty she has to creep up on bathwater.
Yo mama so nasty that pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh.
Yo mama so nasty I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection.
Yo mama so dirty she has to creep up on bathwater.
Yo mama so dirty she makes mud look clean.
Yo mama so dirty that she was banned from a sewage facility because of sanitation worries!
Yo mama so dirty that you can't tell where the dirt stops and she begins.
Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth!
Yo mama so hairy she look like she got Buchwheat in a headlock.
Yo mama so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture!
Yo mama so hairy she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan.
Yo mama's so stupid, she spent twenty minutes lookin' at an orange juice box because it said "concentrate".
Yo mama's so stupid, I put a Scratch-N'-Sniff sticker on the bottom of the pool and she drowned.
Yo mama's so stupid, I asked her do tricks for me and she wagged her tail.
Yo mama's so stupid, she has 1 toe & bought a pair of flip flops
Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to makeup her mind.
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked me what yield meant. I said "Slow down" and she said "What... does.... yield... mean?"
Yo mama's so stupid, she broke her neck at a flashing red light.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put a phone up her *** and thought she was making a booty call.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put on her glasses to watch 20/20.
Yo mama's so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was behind it.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Grape Nuts was an STD.
Yo mama's so stupid, she climbed a chain link fence to see what was on the other side.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got stabbed in a shoot-out.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a knife to a drive-by shooting.
Yo mama's so stupid, she failed a survey.
Yo mama's so stupid, she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to say go.
Yo mama's so stupid, I told her I was reading a book by Homer and she asked if I had anything written by Bart.
Yo mama's so stupid, she gave birth to you.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to commit suicide by jumping off a building, but she got lost on the way down.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to commit suicide by jumping out of the basement window.
Yo mama's so stupid, she needs twice as much sense to be a half-wit.
Yo mama's so stupid, she told me to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and "Don't Walk."
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought brownie points were coupons for a bake sale.
Yo mama's so stupid, when the computer said "Press any key to continue", she couldn't find the 'Any' key.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Tupac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I was drowning and yelled for a life saver, she said "Cherry or grape?"
Yo mama's so stupid, she sat in a tree house because she wanted to be a branch manager.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I told her to squeal like a pig, she said "Moo!"
Yo mama's so stupid, I saw her jumping up and down, asked what she was doing, and she said she drank a bottle of medicine and forgot to shake it.
Yo mama's so stupid, her latest invention was a glass hammer.
Yo mama's so stupid, she saw a billboard that said "Dodge Trucks" and she started ducking through traffic.
Yo mama's so stupid, she died from boiling water in the toaster.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she locked her keys in the car, it took her all day to get Yo family out.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked out of a convertible car with the top down.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she threw a grenade at me I pulled the pin and threw it back.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took you to the drive-in to see "Closed for the season."
Yo mama's so stupid, when she pulled into the drive-thru at McDonald's, she drove through the window.
Yo mama's so stupid, she was on the corner with a sign that said "Will eat for food."
Yo mama's so stupid, she got on an elevator and thought it was a mobile home.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in Furniture World and slept on the floor.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got shoved in an oven and froze to death.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks fruit punch is a gay boxer.
Yo mama's so stupid, she brought a cup to the movie "Juice."
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in a meat locker and sweat to death.
Yo mama's so stupid, she leaves the house for the Home Shopping Network.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to put M&M's in order.
Yo mama's so stupid, she peals M&M's to make chocolate chip cookies.
Yo mama's so stupid, she uses Old Spice for cooking.
Yo mama's so stupid, she threw a rock the ground and missed.
Yo mama's so stupid, her breasts are square cuz she forgot to take the Kleenex out of the box.
Yo mama's so stupid, she sat on the TV & watched the couch.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the store to buy a color TV and asked what colors they had.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought St. Ides was a Catholic church.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought St. Ides was an island in the Caribbean.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks sexual battery is something in a dildo.
Yo mama's so stupid, the first time she used a vibrator, she cracked her two front teeth.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the Gap to get her teeth fixed.
Yo mama's so stupid, she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
Yo mama's so stupid, I saw her walking down the street yelling into an envelope, asked what she was doing, and she said sending a voice mail.
Yo mama's so stupid, she was on the corner giving out potato chips yellin' "Free Lays!"
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to throw a bird off a cliff.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to drown a fish.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought menopause was a button on the VCR.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she worked at McDonald's and someone ordered small fries, she said "Hey Boss, all the small one's are gone."
Yo mama's so stupid, if brains were dynamite, she wouldn't have enough to blow her nose.
Yo mama's so stupid, if brains were gas she wouldn't have enough to power a flea-mobile around the inside of a Froot Loop.
Yo mama's so stupid, when they said they were playing craps she went and got toilet paper.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I asked her if she wanted to play one on one, she said "Ok, but what's the teams?"
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to melt squeeze Parkay.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she took you to the airport and a sign said "Airport Left," she turned around and went home.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put a ruler on her pillow to see how long she slept.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.
Yo mama's so stupid, I said give me a quarterback and she gave me Dan Marino.
Yo mama's so stupid, she was locked in a grocery store and starved to death.
Yo mama's so stupid, if you gave her a penny for her intelligence you'd get change.
Yo mama's so stupid, she ran outside with a purse because she heard there was change in the weather.
Yo mama's so stupid, they had to burn the school down to get her out of 3rd grade.
Yo mama's so stupid, she couldn't tell which way an elevator was going if I gave her two guesses.
Yo mama's so stupid, she wouldn't know up from down if she had three guesses.
Yo mama's so stupid, when her husband lost his marbles she bought him new ones.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Tiger Woods is a forest.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought the internet was something you catch fish with.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to mail a letter with food stamps.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought she could get food stamps at the post office.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to drown herself in a carpool.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a lawsuit was something you wear to court.
Yo mama's so stupid, when the judge said "Order in the court," she said "I'll have a hamburger and a Coke."
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to Burger King and thought she was a queen.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
Yo mama's so stupid that under "Education" on her job application, she put "Hooked on Phonics."
Yo mama's so stupid, she cooked her own complimentary breakfast.
Yo mama's so stupid, she had Dan Quayle check her spelling.
Yo mama's so stupid, when asked what a pronoun was, she said a noun that gets paid.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got hit by a cup and told the police that she got mugged.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks socialism means partying!
Yo mama's so stupid, she tripped over a cordless phone.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to strangle herself with a cordless phone.
Yo mama's so stupid, when asked on an application, "Sex?", she marked, "M, F, and sometimes Wednesday too."
Yo mama's so stupid, when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line, she put "O.K."
Yo mama's so stupid, at bottom of application where it says Sign Here - she put Sagittarius.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Chubby Checkers was a game for fat people.
Yo mama's so stupid, you can tell when she's used the computer because there's White Out all over the screen.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got a part time job painting skittles.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks stereotype is the brand on her clock-radio.
Yo mama's so stupid, she can't make Jello because she can't fit 2 quarts of water in the bix.
Yo mama's so stupid, you can make her eyes twinkle by shining light in her ears.
Yo mama's so stupid, it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she went by the YMCA she said "Hey, they spelled MACY's wrong."
Yo mama's so stupid, on her job application where it says emergency contact she put 911.
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked for a price check at the dollar store.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she pulls up to a flashing red light it sounds like this... Vroom, Screech, Vroom, Screech.
Yo mama's so stupid, it takes her an hour to cook minute rice.
Yo mama's so stupid, if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
Yo mama's so stupid when she asked me what kinda jeans I wore, I said Guess and she said "Ah Levis?"
Yo mama's so stupid, she jumped out the window and went up.
Yo mama's so stupid, she said "what's that letter after x" and I said Y she said "Cause I wanna know".
Yo mama's so stupid, she took lessons for a player piano.
Yo mama's so stupid, she stands up on an empty bus.
Yo mama's so stupid, she studied for a blood test and failed.
Yo mama's so stupid, she died before the police arrived because she couldn't find the "11" button in "9-1-1"
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Boyz2Men was a daycare center.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought hamburger helper came with another person.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to insult you and started with "Yo mama's..."
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought meow mix was a record for cats.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought she needed a token to get on soul train.
Yo mama's so stupid, she invented a solar powered flashlight.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I asked her about X-Men she said "Sure, there's Harry my first baby daddy, Willy the guy I see on Thursdays..."
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought the board of education was a piece of wood.
Yo mama's so stupid, she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Wu-Tang is an orange flavored drink.
Yo mama's so stupid, she sold the car for gas money.
Yo mama's so stupid, she ran out of gas leaving Texaco.
Yo mama's so stupid, her idea of safe sex is locking the car doors.
Yo mama's so stupid, she sold the house to pay the mortgage.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Sherlock Holmes was a housing project.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to a Clippers game to get a hair cut.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to a Whalers game to see Shamu.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she saw a "Wrong Way" sign in her rearview mirror, she turned around.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought asphalt was a skin disease.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Delta Airlines was a sorority.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she saw the "NC-17 (Under 17 Not Admitted)" sign, she went home and got 16 friends.
Yo mama's so stupid, when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon.
Yo mama's so stupid, she married Yo daddy.
Yo mama's so stupid, she called the 7-11 to see when they closed.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she heard 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.
Yo mama's so stupid, I saw her in the frozen food section with a fishing rod.
Yo mama's so stupid, I taught her how to do the running man and I haven't seen the ***** since.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks a sanitary belt is drinking a shot out of a clean glass.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put a peephole in a glass door.
Yo mama's so stupid, when someone said "Take the trash out," she moved.
Yo mama's so stupid, she used a vibrator for an egg beater.
Yo mama's so stupid, she wiped her *** before she took a ****.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks a 17 inch Admiral is a well hung sailor.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went to Dr. Dre for a pap smear.
Yo mama's so stupid, she asked you "What is the number for 911".
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to steal a free sample.
Yo mama's so stupid, I told her Christmas was just around the corner and she went looking for it.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Christmas Wrap is Snoop Dogg's holiday album.
Yo mama's so stupid, she bought a video camera to record cable TV shows at home.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Trak Auto is where you get hair weaves for your car.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to drop acid but the car battery fell on her foot.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got shot running the border after seeing a Taco Bell commercial.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is where you pay your telephone bill.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican Phone Company.
Yo mama's so stupid, she ordered a cheese burger from McDonald's and said "Hold the cheese."
Yo mama's so stupid, she put a quarter in a parking meter and waited for a gumball to come out.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put on a coat to chew winterfresh gum.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got on her knees to drink her "Nehi" peach drink.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Thiland was a men's clothing store.
Yo mama's so stupid, she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W's.
Yo mama's so stupid, when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead.
Yo mama's so stupid, she needed a tutor to learn how to scribble.
Yo mama's so stupid, she ordered her sushi well done.
Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to wake up a sleeping bag.
Yo mama's so stupid, she fell up the stairs.
Yo mama's so stupid, she went on Double Dare and when they asked her name she said "I think I'll take the physical challenge."
Yo mama's so fat, I had to take a train and two busses just to get on her good side.
Yo mama's so fat, I've got to tell two snaps just to cover her fat ***.
Yo mama's so fat, they had to grease a door frame and hold a Twinkie on the other side to get her through.
Yo mama's so fat, she can lay down and stand up and her height doesn't change.
Yo mama's so fat, when she dances, she makes the band skip.
Yo mama's so fat, when she walks across the living room, the radio skips.
Yo mama's so fat, when she played hide-n-go-seek, she hid behind a water tower.
Yo mama's so fat, the horse on her Polo shirt is real.
Yo mama's so fat, the horse on her Jordache jeans is real.
Yo mama's so fat, she's not kidding when she says "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!"
Yo mama's so fat, on Halloween she says "Trick or meatloaf!"
Yo mama's so fat, on Halloween she trick or treats two houses at a time.
Yo mama's so fat, when she opens the refrigerator, it says "I give up!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she opens the refrigerator, it says "Uncle!"
Yo mama's so fat, Fat Albert gave her the rights to say "Hey, hey, hey!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she ordered a "My Size Meal" at McDonald's they gave her a dinosaur.
Yo mama's so fat, when she ordered a "My Size Meal" at McDonald's they gave her the key to the store.
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to Burger King and asked for a Whopper, they gave her the sign.
Yo mama's so fat, when she works at the movie theater, she works as the screen.
Yo mama's so fat, when she runs she makes the CD player skip... at the radio station.
Yo mama's so fat, her belly jiggle is the first ever perpetual motion machine.
Yo mama's so fat, all the restaurants in town have signs that say:
Yo mama's so fat, when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.
Yo mama's so fat, when she ran away, they had to put her picture on the milk truck.
Yo mama's so fat, you can't even see her legs, it just looks like she's gliding across the floor.
Yo mama's so fat, instead of Levis 501 jeans, she wears Levi's 1002's.
Yo mama's so fat, instead of wide leg jeans, she wears wide load.
Yo mama's so fat, she was in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade... wearing ropes.
Yo mama's so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.
Yo mama's so fat, she don't wear a G-String, she wears an A, B, C, D, E, F, G-String.
Yo mama's so fat, she fills up the bath tub, and then she turns on the water.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses diet soap.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to use a lawn chair instead of a Thigh Master.
Yo mama's so fat, she went to sit down and the chair begged for mercy.
Yo mama's so fat, all of her clothes have to be custom made by a contractor.
Yo mama's so fat, when I said I wanted "Pigs in a blanket" she got back in bed.
Yo mama's so fat, when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease, the doctor gave her 5 years to live.
Yo mama's so fat, she doesn't have a doctor, she has a grounds keeper.
Yo mama's so fat, she doesn't have love handles, she has a roll bar.
Yo mama's so fat, she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.
Yo mama's so fat, she's got smaller fat women orbiting around her.
Yo mama's so fat, a picture of her fell off the wall!
Yo mama's so fat, her picture takes two frames.
Yo mama's so fat, I saw a picture of her in a magazine on page 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8.
Yo mama's so fat, when I yell "Kool-Aid," she comes crashing through the wall.
Yo mama's so fat, she could sell shade.
Yo mama's so fat, her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.
Yo mama's so fat, she's larger than life.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes Big Bird look like a rubber duck.
Yo mama's so fat, when she crosses the street, cars look out for her.
Yo mama's so fat, she puts mayonaise on aspirin.
Yo mama's so fat, people jog around her for exercise.
Yo mama's so fat, I ran around her twice and got lost.
Yo mama's so fat, she's once, twice, three times a lady.
Yo mama's so fat, she gets runs in her jeans.
Yo mama's so fat, when she was walking in her jeans I swear I smelled something burning.
Yo mama's so fat, I gotta take three steps back just to see all of her.
Yo mama's so fat, her *** has it's own congressman.
Yo mama's so fat, she shops for clothes in the local tent shop.
Yo mama's so fat, her favorite blouse is a tent.
Yo mama's so fat, she deep-fries her toothpaste.
Yo mama's so fat, her favorite food is seconds.
Yo mama's so fat, when she stepped on a train track, the warning lights went on.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the circus she sees the big top and asks "Where can I try that on?"
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the circus she takes up all the rings.
Yo mama's so fat and old that when God said "Let there be Light", he told her to move her fat *** out of the way.
Yo mama's so fat, even God couldn't raise her spirits.
Yo mama's so fat, at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts.
Yo mama's so fat, the animals at the zoo feed her.
Yo mama's so fat, when your father mounts her, his ears pop.
Yo mama's so fat, "Place Your Ad Here" is printed on each of her butt cheeks.
Yo mama's so fat, every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil.
Yo mama's so fat, when she plays football she plays the interior line.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to keep pesos in one pocket and yen in the other.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears heels, they're flats by the afternoon.
Yo mama's so fat, when she leaves the beach everybody shouts "The coast is clear."
Yo mama's so fat, she wakes up in sections.
Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is rocky-road.
Yo mama's so fat, her driver's license says "Picture continued on other side."
Yo mama's so fat, they used her for a trampoline at the Olympics.
Yo mama's so fat, she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon.
Yo mama's so fat, when she put on some BVD's by the time they reached her waist they spelled "BouleVarD."
Yo mama's so fat, when she auditioned for a part in "Indiana Jones," she got the part as the big rolling ball.
Yo mama's so fat, she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu, and says "Okay."
Yo mama's so fat, when she brought her dress to the cleaners, they said "Sorry, we don't do curtains."
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.
Yo mama's so fat, when I finished having sex with her and tried to roll off, I was still on her.
Yo mama's so fat, I had to roll over twice to get off of her.
Yo mama's so fat, if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his word for it!
Yo mama's so fat, she's got Amtrak tattooed on her leg.
Yo mama's so fat, when the police showed her a picture of her feet, she couldn't identify them.
Yo mama's so fat, she freebases ham.
Yo mama's so fat, we got her in the drive-in free by dressing her as a Chevy.
Yo mama's so fat, she went on a light diet... As soon as it's light she starts eating.
Yo mama's so fat, she's on a new diet... slim slow.
Yo mama's so fat, she ain't on a diet, she's on a triet... She be like "What ya'll eating? I'll try it!"
Yo mama's so fat, she went on a seafood diet... Whenever she saw food she ate it.
Yo mama's so fat, she could go a week without eating and still not lose weight.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't lose weight, only find it.
Yo mama's so fat, when she bends over we go into daylight savings time.
Yo mama's so fat, she's half Indian, half Irish, and half American.
Yo mama's so fat, when I climbed up on top of her, I burned my *** on the lightbulb.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to an office, they tell her to pull up a sofa.
Yo mama's so fat, if she wears fishnet stockings, they'd better be 50 pound test!
Yo mama's so fat, the telephone company gave her two area codes.
Yo mama's so fat, they have to run a relay race to get her belt through her belt loops.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to put her belt on with a boomerang.
Yo mama's so fat, her belt size is the equator.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears an asteroid belt.
Yo mama's so fat, she has her own area code.
Yo mama's so fat, her *** looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud.
Yo mama's so fat, when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back party.
Yo mama's so fat, when I was done I rolled over, over again, and I was still on top of the *****.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't even jump to a conclusion.
Yo mama's so fat, if she weighed five more pounds, she could get group insurance!
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the Rose Parade they thought she was a float.
Yo mama's so fat, she went to Sizzler and got a group discount.
Yo mama's so fat, she made weight watchers go blind.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears a watch on each arm, one for each timezone.
Yo mama's so fat n black, she jumped in the ocean and they thought she was an oil spill.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to wear a three piece bathing suit.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped in the ocean and the ocean jumped back and said "I'll wait my turn."
Yo mama's so fat, when she plays football she play offense and defense.
Yo mama's so fat, her nickname is "Damn."
Yo mama's so fat, the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot-dogs.
Yo mama's so fat, your daddy had to roll her in flower and look for the wet spot.
Yo mama's so fat, she broke her leg and gravy dripped out.
Yo mama's so fat, I shot the ***** and Crisco came out.
Yo mama's so fat, she DJ's for the ice cream truck.
Yo mama's so fat, I tried to **** her doggy style but I was just ridin' piggy back.
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it told her to "Get the **** off."
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it told her "**** it, they don't pay me enough!"
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it told her "Sorry, we don't do livestock."
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale and it said "Please step out of the car."
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a scale and she saw her phone number.
Yo mama's so fat, the last time she saw 90210 she was on a scale.
Yo mama's so fat, when she gets on the scale it says "To be continued."
Yo mama's so fat, when she steps on a scale, it says "One at a time, please."
Yo mama's so fat, when she weighed herself the scale gave her an equation.
Yo mama' so fat, she's moving the Earth out of its orbit.
Yo mama's so fat, Yo father didn't know whether to **** her or take the burro ride down.
Yo mama's so fat, no one can talk behind her back.
Yo mama's so fat, I gain weight just by watching her eat.
Yo mama's so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don't get wet.
Yo mama's so fat, she's got her own zip code.
Yo mama's so fat, she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her as a new world.
Yo mama's so fat, she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't reach her back pocket.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't wear Dazzey Dukes. She has to wear Boss Hoggs.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to iron her pants on the driveway.
Yo mama's so fat, her tailor takes her measurements in light years.
Yo mama's so fat, when she comes down the stairs she measures on the Richter scale.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she even orders "Thank You, Come Again."
Yo mama's so fat, she eats biscuits like tic tacs.
Yo mama's so fat, she don't eat Wheat Thins, she eats Wheat Thicks.
Yo mama's so fat, she fell in love and broke it.
Yo mama's so fat, when yo father fell in love with her he got lost.
Yo mama's so fat, when she swims, she leaves stretch marks on the swimming pool.
Yo mama's so fat, she gets clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-...
Yo mama's so fat, she got hit by a truck and asked "Who threw that rock?"
Yo mama's so fat, she has to pull down her pants to get into her pockets.
Yo mama's so fat, she has more nooks and crannies than a Thomas' English Muffin.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to buy two airline tickets.
Yo mama's so fat, she eats pumpkin pies like Skittles.
Yo mama's so fat, when the cashier at KFC asked what size bucket she wanted, she said the one on the roof.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to grease her hands to get into her pockets.
Yo mama's so fat, she has two stomachs: One for meat, one for vegetables.
Yo mama's so fat, she masturbates reading cookbooks.
Yo mama's so fat, the shadow of her *** weighs 50 pounds.
Yo mama's so fat, even her shadow has stretch marks.
Yo mama's so fat, she needs a roadmap to find her ***.
Yo mama's so fat, she fell in the Grand Canyon and got stuck.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped up in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped for joy and got stuck.
Yo mama's so fat, she measures 36 24 36, and the other arm is just as big.
Yo mama's so fat, the earth orbits around her instead of the sun.
Yo mama's so fat, NASA orbits satellites around her.
Yo mama's so fat, NASA is going to use her to fill the hole in the ozone layer.
Yo mama's so fat, she plays hopscotch like this: LA, Detroit, Seattle, NY.
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to a dating service, they matched her up with Detroit.
Yo mama's so fat, I saw her in New York, and when I told my friend in LA, he'd seen her too.
Yo mama's so fat, after she got off the carousel, the horse limped for a week.
Yo mama's so fat, she puts on her lipstick with a paint-roller.
Yo mama's so fat, she looks like the Stay-Puff marshmallow man on steroids.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat on the corner and the police came & said "Break it up!"
Yo mama's so fat, she can't just work one corner, she has to work all four.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat on a dollar and made change.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat on four quarters and made a dollar.
Yo mama's so fat, her car is made out of spandex.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to get out of the car to change the radio station.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to get out of the car to change gears.
Yo mama's so fat, she got a "speed pass" for Dairy Queen.
Yo mama's so fat, she shows up on radar.
Yo mama's so fat, she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H d.
Yo mama's so fat, she had to roll over 4 times just to get an even tan.
Yo mama's so fat, she tried to get an all-over tan, and the sun burned out.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses hula hoops to hold up her socks.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears a hula-hoop for a belly-button ring.
Yo mama's so fat, her skates went flat.
Yo mama's so fat, she fell off a boat and the captain yelled "Land Ho!"
Yo mama's so fat, she sat on a rowing machine and it sank.
Yo mama's so fat, she went to a Chinese Restaurant and ordered a 40oz. of gravy.
Yo mama's so fat, she has 48 midnight snacks.
Yo mama's so fat, she's on both sides of the family.
Yo mama's so fat, she eats cereal out of a satellite dish.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat in Big Foot and made it a lowrider.
Yo mama's so fat, when she got on the bus she turned it into a low rider.
Yo mama's so fat, when I tried to drive around her, I ran out of gas.
Yo mama's so fat, when she walks down the street everyone yells "Earthquake!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she walks in front of the T.V., you miss 5 minutes of your show.
Yo mama's so fat, the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.
Yo mama's so fat, the only thing she lost at Jenny Craig was $29.95.
Yo mama's so fat, Jenny Craig did a credit check.
Yo mama's so fat, when she volunteered to clean cages at the zoo, people walked by and said "Look at the elephant!"
Yo mama's so fat, the highway patrol made her wear a "Caution! Wide Turn" sign.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat on an Oreo and unlocked the magic.
Yo mama's so fat, they had to baptize her at Sea World.
Yo mama's so fat, last time she went to Sea World Shamu got a hard on.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumed in da ocean and the whales started singing "We are family!"
Yo mama's so fat, when I have sex with her I have to slap her *** and ride the wave in.
Yo mama's so fat, they changed my Physics book to say "What goes up must come down, except Yo mama."
Yo mama's so fat, they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping.
Yo mama's so fat, she bungee jumped and went straight to hell.
Yo mama's so fat, when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses a kiddie slide for a shoe horn.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses blanket as a washcloth.
Yo mama's so fat, when her beeper went off, people thought she was backing up.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the beach, little kids yell "Free Willy, Free Willy."
Yo mama's so fat, as a kid, she couldn't play Hide-n-seek, just seek.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes Free Willy look like a Tic-Tac.
Yo mama's so fat, when she backs up she beeps.
Yo mama's so fat, she plays pool with the planets.
Yo mama's so fat, she's taller lying down.
Yo mama's so fat, the body snatchers called home for backup.
Yo mama's so fat, the only thing she can fit into at the clothing store is the dressing rooms.
Yo mama's so fat, when she fell down the stairs, she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
Yo mama's so fat, she has to use sleeping bags for tube socks.
Yo mama's so fat, they had to install speed bumps at the all-u-can-eat buffet.
Yo mama's so fat, she pulls up a chair to an all-u-can-eat buffet.
Yo mama's so fat, when it says all-u-can-eat it still ain't enough.
Yo mama's so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits AROUND the house.
Yo mama's so fat, you can pinch an inch on her forehead.
Yo mama's so fat, you can smack it up, flip it, and rub it down all at the same time.
Yo mama's so fat, you could go swimming in her bra.
Yo mama's so fat, when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama's so fat, on a scale of 1 to 10, she's a 747.
Yo mama's so fat, she has a greater gravitational attraction than a black hole.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses the carpet as a blanket.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears corduroy pants, the ridges don't show.
Yo mama's so fat, she made Richard Simmons cry.
Yo mama's so fat, even Richard Simmons laughs at her.
Yo mama's so fat, when she saw a yellow bus going down the road she yelled "Hey! Stop that Twinkie."
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a red dress people yell "Hey Kool-Aid Man."
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, people call her "Taxi!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, kids think its the school bus.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wears a purple sweater people call her "Barney."
Yo mama is so fat, when she sits in a chair, the rolls on her legs, cover her feet like a blanket.
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the beach Greenpeace tried to drag her *** back in the water.
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to get a water bed, they put a blanket across Lake Michigan.
Yo mama's so fat, when she sat on a rainbow, Skittle's fell out.
Yo mama's so fat, and you're so poor, when she comes in your house the tires pop.
Yo mama's so fat, she don't know wether she's walking or rolling.
Yo mama's so fat, when she tiptoes, everyone yells "Stampede!"
Yo mama's so fat, she get's her toenails painted at Earl Schieb's.
Yo mama's so fat, but I ****** her anyway.
Yo mama's so fat, when I tried to **** her I didn't know if I was hitting the hole or a roll.
Yo mama's so fat, when my dog went to **** her he had to peel too many fat rolls and said "**** It."
Yo mama's so fat, when she fart the whole planet came out.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes sumo wrestlers look anerexic.
Yo mama's so fat, her car is made of spandex.
Yo mama's so fat, we're inside her right now.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes Big Bird look like a rubber duck.
Yo mama's so fat, one day when she got in a fight the person fighting her got lost in her.
Yo mama's so fat, when she wore a shirt with an AA on it, people thought it was American Airlines biggest jet.
Yo mama's so fat, if she were an airplane, she'd be a jumbo jet.
Yo mama's so fat, one day she was lifting up her rolls and a car fell out.
Yo mama's so fat, Dr. Martens had to kill 3 cows just to make her a pair of shoes.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't stay on a basketball court for three seconds without getting called for a key violation.
Yo mama so fat that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step.
Yo mama's so fat, all the chairs in her house have seatbelts.
Yo mama's so fat, she smells like bacon at 90 degrees.
Yo mama's so fat, and her back is so crooked, when she lays down...people say "I didn't know we had mountains."
Yo mama's so fat, when she travels, she's gotta make two trips.
Yo mama's so fat, God created her, and on tHe seventh day he rested.
Yo mama's so fat, they call her "Big Fat Ho."
Yo mama's so fat, when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
Yo mama's so fat, when she was born, she didn't get a birth certificate, she got blue prints.
Yo mama's so big, her belly button's got an echo.
Yo mama's so big, she has to buy clothes by the acre.
Yo mama's so big, they had to paint a stripe down her back to see if she was walking or rolling.
Yo mama's so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker.
Yo mama's so big, she rollerskates on busses.
Yo mama's so big, she can't wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back.
Yo mama's so big, she uses the interstate for a Slip `n Slide.
Yo mama's so big, she reached in her pocket and handed me a CD, a Compact Dishwasher.
Yo mama's so big, when you climb on top of her your ears pop.
Yo mama's so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers.
Yo mama's so big, when she bent down to tie her shoes, her face got burnt from re-entry.
Yo mama's so big, she whistles bass.
Yo mama's so big, she uses bowling balls for earrings.
Yo mama's so big, that they had to change "One size fit's all" to "One size fits most"
Yo mama's so big, when she went to the airport and said she wanted to fly they stamped Goodyear on her and sent her out to the runway.
Yo mama's so big, when I fingered her I lost a watch and two rings!
Yo mama's so big, when she goes in the water at the beach she changes the tide.
Yo mama's so big, when she stands up the sun goes out.
Yo mama's so big, her belly button's got an echo.
Yo mama's so big, she has to buy clothes by the acre.
Yo mama's so big, they had to paint a stripe down her back to see if she was walking or rolling.
Yo mama's so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker.
Yo mama's so big, she rollerskates on busses.
Yo mama's so big, she can't wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back.
Yo mama's so big, she uses the interstate for a Slip `n Slide.
Yo mama's so big, she reached in her pocket and handed me a CD, a Compact Dishwasher.
Yo mama's so big, when you climb on top of her your ears pop.
Yo mama's so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers.
Yo mama's so big, when she bent down to tie her shoes, her face got burnt from re-entry.
Yo mama's so big, she whistles bass.
Yo mama's so big, she uses bowling balls for earrings.
Yo mama's so big, that they had to change "One size fit's all" to "One size fits most"
Yo mama's so big, when she went to the airport and said she wanted to fly they stamped Goodyear on her and sent her out to the runway.
Yo mama's so big, when I fingered her I lost a watch and two rings!
Yo mama's so big, when she goes in the water at the beach she changes the tide.
Yo mama's so big, when she stands up the sun goes out.
Yo mama's so ugly, well.. look at you!
Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like you.
Yo mama's so ugly, she could only be Yo mama.
Yo mama's so ugly, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.
Yo mama's so ugly, they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
Yo mama's so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection looks back shaking it's head.
Yo mama's so ugly, when the terminator said "I'll be back" he left running.
Yo mama's so ugly, her birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.
Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like she's been in a dryer filled with rocks.
Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like her face caught on fire and they put it out with a fork.
Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like her face caught on fire and they put it out with a track cleat.
Yo mama's so ugly, she's uugly. I had to add another u `cause u is ugly too!
Yo mama's so ugly, her mom had to be drunk to breastfeed her.
Yo mama's so ugly, it looks like she's been bobbing for french fries.
Yo mama's so ugly, even the elephant man paid to see her.
Yo mama's so ugly, when your dad wants to have sex in the car, he tells her to get out.
Yo mama's so ugly, she couldn't get laid in a prison with a handful of pardons.
Yo mama's so ugly, her face is closed on weekends!
Yo mama's so ugly, she could scare the flies off a **** wagon.
Yo mama's so ugly, the last time I saw something that looked like her, I pinned a tail on it.
Yo mama's so ugly, we put her in the kennel when we go on vacation.
Yo mama's so ugly, her shadow quit.
Yo mama's so ugly, her shadow ran away from her.
Yo mama's so ugly, people at the circus pay money not to see her.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she gets up, the sun goes down.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she moved into the projects, all her neighbors chipped in for curtains.
Yo mama's so ugly, roaches go "Hi mom!"
Yo mama's so ugly, she hurt my feelings.
Yo mama's so ugly, Rice Krispies won't talk to her.
Yo mama's so ugly, she'd scare the monster out of Loch Ness.
Yo mama's so ugly, her pillow cries at night.
Yo mama's so ugly, instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck.
Yo mama's so ugly, people make jokes about her.
Yo mama's so ugly, I can't even make a joke out of it.
Yo mama's so ugly, she climbed the ugly ladder and didn't miss a step.
Yo mama's so ugly, Yo daddy tosses the ugly stick and she fetches it every time.
Yo mama's so ugly, she didn't get hit with the ugly stick, she got hit with the ugly log.
Yo mama's so ugly, she didn't get hit with the ugly stick, she ran through the whole damn forest.
Yo mama's so ugly, they rub tree branches on her face to make ugly sticks.
Yo mama's so ugly, her mama had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dog to play with her.
Yo mama's so ugly, she tied a pork chop around her neck and the dog still wouldn't play with her.
Yo mama's so ugly, my dog took one look at her and ran away.
Yo mama's so ugly, she makes blind children cry.
Yo mama's so ugly, the kids call her Lassie and feed the ***** dog biscuits.
Yo mama's so ugly, her picture is on the inside of a Roach Motel.
Yo mama's so ugly, people hang her picture in their cars so their radios don't get stolen.
Yo mama's so ugly, I took her to a haunted house and she came out with a job application.
Yo mama's so ugly, I took her to the zoo, guy at the door said "Thanks for bringing her back."
Yo mama's so ugly, I took her to the zoo and the monkeys said "Damn, how'd you get out so fast."
Yo mama's so ugly, even the tide won't come back in.
Yo mama's so ugly, even the tide won't take her out.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she went to Taco Bell they said "There's nothing ordinary about it!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when she went camping, the park ranger was like "Hey Yogi!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when she went to Taco Bell everyone ran for the border.
Yo mama's so ugly, people go as her for Halloween.
Yo mama's so ugly, she can look up a camel's butt and scare the hump off of it.
Yo mama's so ugly, she looked out the window and the police fined her for mooning.
Yo mama's so ugly, she has 7 years bad luck just trying to look at herself in the mirror.
Yo mama's so ugly, she can't even bare the thought of ******* herself.
Yo mama's so ugly, I have to watch your sister undress just to calm down.
Yo mama's so ugly, Medusa is jealous.
Yo mama's so ugly, it looks like she ran the 100 yard dash in a 90 yard gym.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she cries, tears run down the back of her neck.
Yo mama's so ugly, she could be the poster child for abortion/birth control!
Yo mama's so ugly, she uses her face for birth control.
Yo mama's so ugly, she practices birth control by leaving the lights on.
Yo mama's so ugly, the Pro-Lifers would make an exception in her case.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she got in the tub, the water jumped out.
Yo mama's so ugly, they put her face on a poster for abstinence.
Yo mama's so ugly, she has to creep up on her makeup.
Yo mama's so ugly, she has to creep up on water to get a drink.
Yo mama's so ugly, when I took her to a haunted house she came out with a paycheck.
Yo mama's so ugly, she could scare the chrome off a bumper!
Yo mama's so ugly, she could scare the moss off a rock!
Yo mama's so ugly, she could scare Cujo off a meat truck.
Yo mama's so ugly, it looks like she got hit with a hot sack of nickels.
Yo mama's so ugly, her dentist treats her by mail-order.
Yo mama's so ugly, she has to trick or treat over the phone.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she masterbates she gets arrested for cruelty to animals.
Yo mama's so ugly, she makes onions cry.
Yo mama's so ugly, she scares roaches away.
Yo mama's so ugly, she's never seen herself 'cause the mirrors keep breaking.
Yo mama's so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it wouldn't even come back.
Yo mama's so ugly, that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.
Yo mama's so ugly, that if ugly were bricks she'd be building a highrise.
Yo mama's so ugly, that if ugly were an Olympic event, she would be the dream team.
Yo mama's so ugly, she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
Yo mama's so ugly, it makes me wish birth control is retroactive.
Yo mama's so ugly, Yo father takes her to work just so he doesn't have to kiss her good-bye.
Yo mama's so ugly, when Yo father is having sex with her he puts two bags on her head in case one of them breaks.
Yo mama's so ugly, Yo father's breath smells like **** 'cause he'd rather kiss her ***.
Yo mama's so ugly, just after she was born, her mama said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."
Yo mama's so ugly, when she goes to the therapist, he makes her lie on the couch face down.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born, they named her "Damn!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born, the doctor slapped her and her parents.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born the doctor smacked everyone.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born the doctor looked at her ***, then her face, and said "Twins!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born the doctor smacked her face.
Yo mama's so ugly, the doctor is still smacking her ***.
Yo mama's so ugly, she pretends SHE's someone else when she's having sex.
Yo mama's so ugly, even Bill Clinton wouldn't sleep with her.
Yo mama's so ugly, she got a sex change and the surgeon had to flip a coin.
Yo mama's so ugly, your real pops could only be a ******' dog.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born, the doctor smacked the wrong end.
Yo mama's so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Yo mama's so ugly, the last time she heard a whistle was when she got hit by a train.
Yo mama's so ugly, the psychiatrist makes her lie face down.
Yo mama's so ugly, when two guys broke into her apartment, she yelled "rape" and they yelled "NO!"
Yo mama's so ugly, she was a guard for Castle Greyskull.
Yo mama’s so ugly, that if ugly were a crime, she’d get the electric chair.
Yo mama's so ugly, she has to get the baby drunk to breast feed it.
Yo mama's so ugly, she scared the stitches off Frankenstein.
Yo mama's so ugly, they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.
Yo mama's so ugly, they know what time she was born, because her face stopped the clock!
Yo mama's so ugly, if you looked up ugly in the dictionary her picture would be next to it.
Yo mama's so ugly, they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
Yo mama's so ugly, they put her face on box of Ex-Lax and sold it empty.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she passes by a bathroom the toilet flushes.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was lying on the beach, the cat tried to bury her.
Yo mama's so ugly, if she was a scarecrow, the corn would run away.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she walks in the kitchen, the rats jump on the table and start screaming.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillance cameras.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born she was put in an incubator with tinted windows.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born, her mama saw the afterbirth and said "Twins."
Yo mama's so ugly, she gives Freddy Kreuger nightmares.
Yo mama's so ugly, even a blind man wouldn't have sex with her.
Yo mama's so ugly, Yo dad first met her at the pound.
Yo mama's so ugly, you could stick her face in dough and make monster cookies.
Yo mama's so ugly and fat, Greenpeace mistook her for an endangered elephant.
Yo mama's so damn ugly and desperate, she did Winnie the Pooh and Tiger too.
Yo mama's such an ugly *****, she has a sign in her yard that says "Beware of Dog."
Yo mama was such an ugly baby, her parents had to feed her with a slingshot.
Yo mama's so ugly, she can stand on the front porch and count the chickens in the back.
When Yo mama was born they had to take her out of the trash can cause doctor said "Throw this **** away!"
Yo mama's so ugly, when I last saw a mouth like hers, it had a hook in it.
Yo mama's so old, I told her to act her age and the ***** died.
Yo mama's so old, she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp.
Yo mama's so old, she used to gang bang with the Flintstone's.
Yo mama's so old, she drove a chariot to high school.
Yo mama's so old, she's got hieroglyphics on her driver's license.
Yo mama's so old, she took her drivers test on a dinosaur.
Yo mama's so old, the key on Ben Franklin's kite was to her apartment.
Yo mama's so old, she has all the apostles in her black book.
Yo mama's so old, she DJ'd at the Boston Tea Party.
Yo mama's so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.
Yo mama's so old, she needed a walker when Jesus was still in diapers.
Yo mama's so old, Jurassic Park brought back memories.
Yo mama's so old, her memory is in black and white.
Yo mama's so old, she has a Jesus Starter jacket.
Yo mama's so old, she used to baby-sit Yoda.
Yo mama's so old, she baby-sat for Jesus.
Yo mama's so old, her social security number is 1.
Yo mama's so old, when the police asked her for her ID, she gave them a rock.
Yo mama's so old, her birth-certificate expired.
Yo mama's so old, her birth-certificate is in Roman numerals.
Yo mama's so old, she ran track with dinosaurs.
Yo mama's so old, she has a picture of Jesus in her yearbook.
Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the last supper.
Yo mama's so old, she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.
Yo mama's so old, she knew the Beetles when they were the New Kids on the Block.
Yo mama's so old, she knew Mr. Clean when he had an afro.
Yo mama's so old, she owes Jesus a nickel.
Yo mama's so old, she owes Moses a quarter.
Yo mama's so old, she's got Jesus' beeper number.
Yo mama's so old, when she was in school there was no history class.
Yo mama's so old, when God said "Let there be light" she was there to flick the switch.
Yo mama's so old, when Moses split the red sea, she was on the other side fishing.
Yo mama's so old, when she reads the bible she reminisces.
Yo mama's so old, she's mentioned in the shout out at the end of the bible.
Yo mama's so old, she planted the first tree at Central Park.
Yo mama's so old, she got the first copy of the Ten Commandments.
Yo mama's so old, she has an autographed bible.
Yo mama's so old, the candles cost more than the birthday cake.
Yo mama's so old, she sat next to Jesus in third grade.
Yo mama's so old, she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
Yo mama's so old, she knew Cap'n Crunch while he was still a private.
Yo mama's so old & ugly, her name is Ape.
Yo mama's so old, when she was young rainbows were black and white.
Yo mama's so old, she called the cops when David and Goliath started to fight.
Yo mama's so old and fat that when God said "Let there be Light", he told her to move her fat *** out of the way.
Yo mama's so old, she used to baby-sit Jesus.
Yo mama's so old, when she was born, the Dead Sea was just getting sick.
Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, she uses them to cut chain at the hardware store.
Yo mama's gold tooth is so fake, her whole mouth turned green.
Yo mama's got two gold teeth, one says 24k and the other says "Believe that **** if you want to."
Yo mama's teeth look like Honey Smacks.
Yo mama's teeth are so ugly, she got pulled over for not having dental insurance.
When I looked at Yo mama's teeth, I didn't know whether to smile or to kick a field goal.
Yo mama's teeth are so black, it looks like she's been eatin' coal.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she has to brush them with a butter knife.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she can butter a whole loaf of bread.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she slows down traffic when she smiles.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she drinks water it turns into lemonade.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she looks like she got a job taste testing butter scotch.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when God said "Let there be light", he told her to smile.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she closes her mouth her eyes light up.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she walked into a church, everybody said "I see the light!"
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, crows fly down and pick at them like it was corn.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, Dorothy and Toto thought it was the Yellow Brick Road.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she smiled, Dorothy made it to OZ.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she spits butter.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she looks like a cheeseburger.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she's got more gold than Fort Knox.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, you'd think she's been blowin' the Simpsons.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, she looks like she's got a Twinkie in her mouth.
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she smiles it looks like a Kraft Singles pack.
Yo mama's teeth are so nasty, they make Yuck Mouth afraid of the cavity creeps.
Yo mama's teeth are so big, when she sneezed she bit a hole in her chest.
Yo mama's teeth are so big, her dentist charges her by the tooth.
Yo mama's teeth are so big, it looks like her mom had an affair with Mr. Ed.
Yo mama's teeth are so big, I thought they were piano keys.
Yo mama's missing so many teeth, you can play checkers on her mouth.
Yo mama's so toothless, it took her an hour to eat minute rice.
Yo mama's got so many gaps in her teeth it looks like piano keys.
Yo mama's got so many teeth missing, it looks like her tongue is in jail.