My dad died and I'm having a rough time getting over it, any advice??

Question

I had the most wonderful relationship with him. I was his wood tic...I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!! He died of brain cancer and lived for 5 years since last May. I really miss him. I have dreams about him almost every night, and I don't go a night without crying. Am I depressed? Is this normal? I have dreams of him telling me that he's okay and he loves me! That's so great but I'm still struggling. Any advice would help if any of you have had a similar situation. Thanks.

Okay, I want to let you know i am not a fruit cake either.. I mean I love my dad more than I love anything. When he died I started reading the Bible and I plan to finish it before 2 years passes. I do not need pills I need time I guess, thanks for all of your answers. But I would appreciate not being told to take pills. That would make me feel like I'm crazy or something because I know I'm not.

Wow, thanks guys.I feel like I haven't told you enough to get an idea about dad and me. He died at age 53. Just this May actually. He was originally diagnosed with cancer on May 5th, 2001. I never once heard him complain about his pills or chemo. I never once saw him cry until the end when my best friend and I went to visit him in the hospital about 6 months before his death. You see, he loved me enough to tell me NO. I had 5 siblings. 4 brothers, 1 sister. He did everything he could to spend time with me and my family. Every night he would come in and pray with me and tell me he loves me. My Grandpa died in March. And I knew at that funeral that it would be the same thing as dad's...only my dad was in the coffin, not grandpa. Many times I would ask myself, WHY? But my dad would ask WHY NOT ME?I was proud of him. At the end all he talked about was God,and I think I was more proud of him that he was me. Which is something that I probably couldn't compare with.

Answer 1

Hey Little Angel Girl!
> Sorry of such a heavy loss but you know your dear father can't come back now. Fact may be understood to over come your loneliness and grief.
> I would oppose to use the PILLS, because they kill the person, so I don't want you to be killed by this such a stupid thing.
> May I know how old are you. Because I can give you solutions as per your age group.
> As per my assumptions you must be between 15 to 20.
> So if Yes then lets start a new life>
> You are in school so concentrate on your studies, work hard and become the BEST STUDENT.
> Help your mother in managing the house and kitchen.
> Have guidance from your elder brother(s) and sister(s). If you have.
> Become a means of guidance for you younger brother(s) and sister(s). If you have.
> Start doing Art work, decorate your home.
> Go for outing and pick nick and try to wash your grief.
> Become what your father want to make you, complete his dreams.
> I Pray for you and best wishes.

Answer 2

My father died 4 years ago now, and even tonight I was crying over his photo, although I was laughing too. Telling him what a hash I'd made of my life without him to guide me. The dreams are great, I got them too, feels like they are real. If you believe in it, as I didn't until I got my first dream, it is him telling you he is ok. I haven't got over it I never will, and all potential boyfriend have to remind me of him in some way. I made a mistake and 6 weeks after got involved with a man, turned out to be the worst decision ever, but I neede comfort.
Advice is this, don't make any deciaions for 12 months. Try to make him proud in everything you do. That way he'll be with you everywhere and you won't feel so alone. Talk to your doctor. They have bereavement concelling which really helps, also amitripiline may help, very mild anti depressant. Or herbal wise, St Johns Wort. You are not depressed, just grieving for a very special person. You have lost a huge part of you. That will never nbe replaced, but you will be able to laugh at memories, and smile instead of cry when you think of him, in time.Lots of time. So sorry.

Answer 3

I have to say that I don't think you ever get over it. Hopefully it will just get easier with time. My fiance lost his sister in a car accident a little over a year ago and I Iearned that everyone really does grieve in her/his own way. Crying is good, getting mad is good, basically not stuffing your emotions is important. Everyone mourns in her own way and don't let anyone tell you differently. Sleeping a lot is quite common, as is withdrawing from social situations. In short, there is no such thing as normal when it comes to grief. As long as you don't engage in activities that hurt you (drinking, drugs) just take your time and follow your own healing process, whatever that may be. Perhaps a grief support group would help you. I hope that you have at least one person who you trust and talk about your Dad with you. I can't begin to imagine the pain you are feeling. Your father must have been a wonderful man for you to love him so much. I wish you only the best.

Answer 4

i'm deeply sorry approximately your loss. that's an somewhat complicated difficulty so which you will stay via, yet you will replace right into a smarter and greater emotionally mature guy or woman in some years. First - write down, in case you want it, some suggestions of issues you probably did with your dad earlier his became into ill. comprise some solid advice he gave you in case you remember some. Then - remind your self to recollect those issues from situations while he became into healthful and concentration on those issues. once you want somebody to get advice from, ask your self what your dad could say. you would be shocked which you will get, in a couple of minutes or some hours, an concept that solutions your question. Your instructor became into attempting that could be useful you, as you will recognize. Please be polite sufficient to thank her for attempting to help, yet clarify you at the instant are not waiting to talk yet, and you experience greater appropriate understanding she tried to help. You do could desire to talk to somebody, and maximum pupils have by no skill experienced something like your difficulty. There are web content for families who've misplaced a be sure, and there are help communities. Ask your college counselor if s/he knows of any help group on your section, or ask the closest medical institution in the event that they recognize of any.

Answer 5

I'm so sorry , I do know what you are going through . I lost my Daddy too , and I had an extremal hard time coming to grips with it . My Dad was only 44 yrs. old . I was truly Daddy girl
{ I had 5 brothers and I was the only girl } , thus we were very close . Time will make it easier to deal with , in the meantime just think about all the good times you spent with him and treasure
your memories ! One other thing sweetie Cancer is horrible try
to understand that he is no longer in pain maybe that will help >
You can contact me through my 360 page if you need to talk .

Answer 6

OK..this question hits home..because I too had the worst time when my dad died. First of all I will tell you that we really never get over our parents death. I am 44 yrs old and lost my dad back on 4/17/2000. I still miss him so much. I will tell you that time eases the pain. Of course there will be days when you still miss them so bad your heart feels like it will explode and only you will understand that pain. Others will try to understand but they wont. Know that it is OK to miss them but, it concerns me about you crying every night. Have you tried to get some type of help? Have you talked to someone about it? I had to get help because I knew I could not do it on my own. I went to therapy and it helped to have someone listen to me. Just having someone listen to how I felt helped me. I would also write my feelings down. Nothing in any particular order, just my thoughts. You might want to try to do that to see if it helps. Your dad does love you and he does want you to know he is okay. He does not want you to cry and be sad. If you want to email me, please feel free to do so. I will be more than happy to talk to you. I do understand what you are going through and I know it is not easy. Hang in there sweetie.

Answer 7

I am so sorry for your lost. A father and daugther relationship is like no other. It is good to cry do not hold back. crying is healing and praying help deal with your lost. I lost my mother and there no greater love than to lose a mother or father. But pray changes thing. Talk to your friends and family about how you feel that will help you with the healing process. It will take sometime to heal so keep the faith keep your head up and I will be praying for you.

Answer 8

Like you I also lost my parents. The hurt never goes away and you will always miss him. But time will make it so you don't cry everyday. I never thought time would heal but it has. All your dad would want is for you to be happy. I know it is tough but you will get through it. If it would help maybe go to grief counseling or a support group where others are going through the same things you are.

Answer 9

I lost my dad when I was 13. What you are going through is very normal. The dreams you have about him are in a way to make up for his absence. Your subconcious is trying to relieve the pain of the absence with those dreams. I also received help from a counselor. So, if you go to a school that has a counselor... you should go. And lastly, time cures everything. Its just a process you have to go through. In fact, it is a process that we all humans have to go through, since life is not eternal. If you have a faith in God, that also helps a lot. Never give up. Your dad wouldn't want you to give up.

Answer 10

I am sorry for your loss. I lost my Dad December 31st and my whole family misses him but I know that he's not suffering any more. When I dream of him, he's healthy and strong, not like he was at the end.

I know he doesn't want to see my family sad and I try to be strong but it's natural to grieve. Just remember, we'll all be together again some day.