I'm getting married soon...but i just want to go and be married in vegas and not worry about inviting people to this HUGE ceremony that i dont even want...I'd rather just have a reception type party after me and my fiance get back and he wants the same...but do i owe it to my family to have the ceremony? or should we just do what we want? any advice will help! thanks!
2006-10-01 09:00:13 · 28 answers · asked by tx_percheron_tx 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
i dont think some people have read the whole thing, we want to include family but only in reception form. I just dont want the stress of worrying about inviting and leaving out people for the ceremony and at a reception, everyone can be included without worry becouse i live on a large ranch and it would cost nearly nothing to have them there instead of using a church or reception hall that we cannot afford
2006-10-01 09:42:18 · update #1
I think do it the way that you want to do it. Its your wedding. If they want you to have a big wedding ceremony for the family, have them pay for it!
2006-10-01 09:03:10 · answer #1 · answered by ? 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hey you're following a trend that's become a readily popular thing with many couples since people are not wanting to spend the money on a huge wedding which would mean inviting family members who would complain about everything from the dress you picked out for you and your bridal party to the food to the limitation on drinks and why a free bar wasnt a better choice. Vegas is cheaper and all you have to do is basically get married and have an informal reception at a restaurant and relatives and it's less stress on you and your soon to be husband and at the same time your handful of family and close friends you want there can have fun at the same time and share even better memories than some overpriced one day party.
2006-10-01 10:18:07 · answer #2 · answered by nabdullah2001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of people elope and have a big party later. Go ahead and do it if it's what you both want! I've heard of parents offering their children $10,000 to elope, because moderately sized weddings usually cost a good bit more than that, and they're also a ton more trouble.
If you elope, you will come closer to remembering your wedding as an intimate, meaningful occasion. I had a big wedding and my husband and I were so nervous! I was having an out-of-body experience until I got in the car with him to go to Atlanta!
If you are on a guilt trip about taking this big event away from your family, why don't you and your husband secretly get married early? Go on a little getaway, get married while you're gone and don't tell anyone. You can have your special night and your family can have theirs. If you're worried about the money for a big event, it can cost very little to have a ceremony at a church or outdoors. You could even get married at your home. You already said you could have the guests over to your place without spending much, so it doesn't sound like it'd be much of a problem.
2006-10-01 15:46:39 · answer #3 · answered by Jenny Alice 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a very dear friend, who did this we were planning on going off to get married and having the reception after they got back. Everyone was invited to the reception at a family's member home. But the close family were asked to be there an hour before the guests arrived for pictures. Well, when they got there they were surprised by the bride and groom, who hadn't gotten married but were getting married that day, right then and there.
The bride wore a short white dress, and the groom had on a nice suit, A judge perform the surprise wedding, and then the guests started arriving to a real celebration. The couple didn't want the hassle of a big wedding, but could bring theirselves to "run off" and get married without their families, so they pulled a fast one on them.
If you don't want the hazzle of a big wedding, then honey, don't do it. A lot of people think the bride always wants a huge ceremony, but that's not the case. My daughter didn't, she's a very shy person, but the groom wanted to see her walk down the aisle in a white gown. So, we had a small wedding, a very causal reception with bbq and cokes, and ice cream. It's your day, and you are right, so please do want you feel you are capable of doing, and want to do.
I use to plan weddings, and I still help with family and friend's, the money that goes into this big huge broadway productions is crazy, I love the idea of having a big ranch reception, and if you want to put the wedding dress on there, and have the wedding right on the ranch. It's your choice- your day....so please have the best and happiest of wedding days whether you are at the ranch or in Vegas.
God bless us all..............
2006-10-01 12:48:09 · answer #4 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough question to answer. Getting married is a great experience. I know you think it is easier to just up and do it without anyone getting hurt, but you must think your families will be hurt if your asking us for advice. Yes it is your wedding, But how many times will your family get to share in this moment with you and be proud of your union.
My (now husband) and I went through the same thing. We choose to only invite our immediate family and we got married on a cruise ship so that we had a good reason why not everyone would be there. We announced out wedding in the form of reception invites and asked that everyone come celebrate our union afterward.
It would have broken my mom's heart if she couldn't see her only daughter get married.
My grandmom would have cried as I am the first born grandchild. Since my father passed when I was small I didn't know it until I asked but my grandpop waited my whole growing years for me to ask him to give me away.
I feel after everything I made the right choice to keep it small and intimate with just immediate family.
I was so worried sick I would make the wrong choice. We got married January of 2006. Congrats and good luck with your choice and remember including family does not have to make it a big ordeal.
2006-10-01 13:54:01 · answer #5 · answered by Destiny2dy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that part of it is doing what you two want to do, but also a big part of it is sharing this special occassion with the ones that are special to you in your lives. They won't just be there for the ceremony, but they'll also probably be there for the two of you when you need help with your relationship (if it needs any). They're there to support and offer advice to you two.
You don't have to have a huge ceremony either. The ceremony isn't about how grand you can make it. Make it as simple as you want, whatever you feel comfortable doing. The ceremony is for you two to get married, and your guests are your support. You don't need to design the ceremony for them.
2006-10-01 09:23:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Think this through, what is it you really don't like about having the big wedding? Is it the impersonal nature of it, the money, the crowd of people, the planning? I feel that even if it is your wedding, you owe something to your family especially your parents. Find a way to minimize whatever it is you're trying to avoid while including your family.
Congratulations on your engagement! All the best!
2006-10-01 09:11:28 · answer #7 · answered by angelblue112 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea, well, I know what you mean. Mothers and Fathers make life so miserable sometimes. It is YOUR wedding. Do what you want. Unless you are asking for money to get married, thats another story. If you and your mate are planning your wedding in Vegas and are not asking for any financial help at all, then go for it. My parents paid for my wedding 18 years ago and I had to conform to all kinds of stuff I didn't want. I look back on the photos and the stupid "veil/headband" my mother INSISTED I wear, and I cringe. Do what you want. After all, your only supposed to get married once, so do it how you want.
2006-10-01 09:04:37 · answer #8 · answered by HootieFan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you and your fiance agree that Vegas is what you want, then I don't see any compelling reason for you to have to sacrifice that.
Since you're asking this question, you must feel that your family would be very upset by that choice, but the bottom line is that it's your wedding and not their wedding. You have to do what makes you happiest because you'll only be married once.
2006-10-01 09:09:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
as a mother of a daughter that is about to be married, one that is already married and 2 unmarried sons, i say do what makes you truely happy, but really think about it and discuss it with each other to make sure that's what you both want. if it is, do it, but your idea of the after wedding reception is good. your parents may be more receptive than you think, when you talk to them!
2006-10-01 10:00:58 · answer #10 · answered by msawbest 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are marrying your fiance and if he wants the same thing as you girl..you have lucked out. you are the two who count here. It is your day. Announce to everyone what your plans are and if they have an issue with it ..so be it. One thing is a fact...there is no way you can please everyone when planning a wedding , so don't even try. Good luck!!!! And have fun with it all ...make it a day you will always reflect over with a big smile :)
2006-10-01 09:10:50 · answer #11 · answered by Zoey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋