Do you believe that when you are too strict on your child and place too many restrictions on them, and are overprotective and don't allow them to have much of a social life, that when they are old enough to move out or go to college, then they will get very wild? I know several people like this. One of my best friends parents would not let her do ANYTHING. They were always checking up on her, wouldn't let her go out with friends, and placed a lot of rules on her. Eventually she ended up pregnant at 17, because she snuck and got a boyfriend whom she ended up having sex with. The harder her parents fought to prevent her from seeing him, then the harder she fought to see him. So do you think that sometimes there is such a thing as having TOO many rules and are her parents to blame?
2006-10-01 08:06:44 · 9 answers · asked by Shannon83 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
There is such a thing as too many rules. I think that if you too strict and keep your kids grounded then they will do any thing to break free and when they do end up in a bad situation, they don't know how to handle it because they know if they ask you ,then you will smack the **** out of them for putting themselves in a bad situation. It's a vicious cycle that needs to be broken. And for all you parents out there NEVER FORBID YOUR DAUGHTER TO SEE A GUY YOU DON'T LIKE!!! she will only fight that much harder to be with him and end up marrying him and having babies i know because thats what I did. If you leave it alone she will lose interest. daughters should feel like they can talk to their parents without getting in trouble
2006-10-01 08:36:13 · answer #1 · answered by krystal s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure, some kids figure if they are going to be blamed they might as well do the crime. Teens should be given gradual privileges as they prove themselves able to handle them responsibly. That's how they learn to trust their own judgment. Its really a parents job to teach their kids right and wrong as they grow, so that any mistakes are made while the parents are still there to guide the child. You can't send a 19 year old out into the world who has never been allowed to make a decision, that's unrealistic.
Her parents aren't to blame though, I'm pretty sure it was the daughter who had sex and got pregnant and that at no point did those parents indicate that premarital sex and pregnancy were an ok thing to do. She has to take responsiblity for her foolish decisions.
2006-10-01 08:39:44 · answer #2 · answered by justa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
odds are about 9 to 1 that yes your right that scenario will play out so yes the parents are at fault(not fully) because children have a natural curiosity and not letting them satisfy that once in a while makes them act wild sometimes because they have never had that freedom and want to let all of those pent up feelings out. Also sometimes when children are sheltered they feel like there is something that the parents are hiding from them and that makes them want that freedom even more. I know many girls who were like you friend almost all for those same reasons. but I would say that it is actually okay to run a house like that as long as you give your child the occasional freedom.
2006-10-01 08:30:13 · answer #3 · answered by Kaliana D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh ya! The road to Hell is paved with good intentions. Isolation of any kind leads to behaviours that embark on a path that sadly come to a bitter end. As parents we are given the most precious gift and we do our darnedest to protect it. Unfortunately fear breeds contempt and at times parents will stop at nothing to get their point across that this world is an unsafe place. Forgetting that they too had to find their way. Communication, Education and understanding are what we as parents need to share with our children for them to grow up healthy and confident.
2006-10-01 08:25:42 · answer #4 · answered by ava_weis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are right, too many rules are stupid. The goal of parenting is to prepare your child for life, which includes protecting them from it when they are young.
She however, is to blame for her choices. My parents were very much like hers but I knew for sure I never wanted to get pregnant - i had plans. She doesn't have plans, she just wants out.
She has the tremendous task ahead of her of learning to manage her life for herself and not in reaction to her parents' mistakes.
2006-10-01 08:14:04 · answer #5 · answered by t jefferson 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have seen similar things happen with girls from where I live . . I believe in a way a parents assume partial responsibility . . instead of trying to shelter her, they should have been teaching her right from right . . but at the same time, she's responsible for what she did . . .
I think it's best to inform kids so that know what and what not to do . . and at least let them know what the consequences of their actions could be . . .
2006-10-01 08:12:05 · answer #6 · answered by ♥LoisLane♥ 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes. especially when the parents don't give the kid any chance to make their own choices or have any control over thier life. That's when they rebel - when they're not trusted anyway.
2006-10-01 08:14:00 · answer #7 · answered by Emily O 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think so too but it's hard letting go. People just need to raise the kids with values and trust that they will make the right choices.
It's a tough balance-
2006-10-01 08:12:12 · answer #8 · answered by Alison 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I knw what you mean. My mom has too many rules on me and I'm only 14 and I've had sex. It does have affect. Parents need to understand that this time and day kids are being kids.
2006-10-01 08:12:52 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋