2006-10-01 05:00:21 · 19 answers · asked by sabrinameg 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Upset?!?!? What was your 13 year old doing with a 40 year old and vice versa?!?!?! 13 is way too young to mother a child........research her other options and send his a** to jail!!!
2006-10-01 05:10:04 · answer #1 · answered by rn.student 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Ok, darlin', take a deep breath.
You've got a couple of really tough issues on your hands.
First off, your child has been sexually abused. Take her to the doctor and verify her physical condition. Then you and the doctor can talk about what needs to be done. Ask him if your daughter should physically sustain this preganancy. Everything you say to him is confidential.
You need to notify the police. The man is a pedophile and the actions you take now will protect another child from having to suffer at his hands. Also notify the school so that they can secure the premisis if they see this man stalking the children. Ask if the guidance counselor can see your daughter as a support. She's going to need a neutral place to voice her feelings.
You need to take a look at modifying your behaviors. Making responsible decisions is a learned skill. You are coping with serious repurcussions of poor decision making. (This is only an observation based on your other questions. By no means am I judging you. It takes life experience to learn to make decisions that don't hurt.)
If you have not already, go to social services and apply for assistance. Apply for a housing subsidy, subsidized daycare, state health insurance, Wic, HEAP, and anything else they offer. Apply for child support now. Child support is retroactive to the day your file. File for every one of your children. This is a decision you make in favor of your child, not Against the father.
Stop letting men into your home. This needs to be the haven for your family, where they are safe and can just be the kids. If you are dating and he doesn't have his own place he isn't ready for an adult relationship. Read: he's still depending on other people to support him, we call these people "children". So dump him.
You want someone who has a place for you to have privacy that isn't your home.
Ask yourself if the man in your life treats you with respect. Ask if he treats himself with respect.....Do other people respect him? Try to see him through other people's eyes.....
When the right man comes along you will think he is a good friend. He will consider your needs and not try to take from you and the children. He will provide a home and some security for you. Be leery of the men who offer to live with you. They know you recieve assistance and are looking for a way out. They are not men, they are children. You are an adult, with an adult life and adult responsibilties and you need a man.
Be your own best friend. Follow the advice you would give someone you dearly love. We only go round once, darlin', make it good.
2006-10-01 05:39:39 · answer #2 · answered by Sunbaby 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would get the police involved right now as far as the 40 year old goes. Your 13 year old on the other hand needs to go to a doctor, is her body mature enough to handle a baby? Also does she want to keep the baby? I wish you luck in this situation.
2006-10-01 05:44:58 · answer #3 · answered by tannedknight45 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Irene is right. He raped your daughter. Plain and simple. Why ask what is a 13 year old see's in a 40 year old? Ask what the hell does a 40 year old see in a 13 year old? A child, a baby. That person is sick, sick, sick. Be there for your daughter and let her know you love her and will help her through this tough time. I know you will do the right thing.
2006-10-01 05:31:10 · answer #4 · answered by Erin 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
My heart goes out for you and your family. I am so sorry that you are facing such a huge crisis now. Since your daughter is only 13 and that JERK is 40, he has committed a STATUTORY RAPE to a minor. You should hold him accountable for this crime. You must report this to the police and talk to a lawyer , family counselor and seek legal recourse. This JERK sooner or later Will leave your daughter in the middle of nowhere and will commit the very same crime somewhere else.
My honest advise is you need JUSTICE and this man has to be reported to police for his illegal actions.
As for your daughter I don't know what to say. Good Luck and ask GOD to help you and your family to hel you through this ordeal.
2006-10-01 05:14:42 · answer #5 · answered by US 2 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Report it to the police...this is called rape and child molestation. He will go to jail. If I were you I'd get a restraining order against him immediately and definitely press charges against him. Your daughter has been violated in the worst possible way by a 40 year old pervert. You owe it to your daughter and other young girls out there to get him off the streets. Do it today..don't wait.
2006-10-01 05:37:40 · answer #6 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Someone has really bad math skills .....40 never goes into 13.
Be sure to report the poor math to the local cops they can give him some private lessons .... years worth ..... they can also get your daughter and you the needed counseling .... and assist her the the very important decision of pregnancy at 13 ... its bad for the mom and the unborn
2006-10-01 05:13:54 · answer #7 · answered by John 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
In any language it would be called sexual abuse, and don't get confused by what your daughter might have been 'trained' to believe by the old man.
Your daughter needs immediate counselling by a professional and so do you, so that you both can move forward beyond this trauma and tragedy.
May God be with you thru this troubled times and may you be guided by Light thru this dark period.
2006-10-01 06:00:19 · answer #8 · answered by Abhishek Joshi 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG! how did that happen?? this is rape even if she gave consent becos she's a minor. you should do the best for ur daughter by sending him to jail and i don't think its fair for ur daughter to raise her baby as she has her life ahead of her and she should still enjoy her childhood while she can! I think you both needs counselling and if I was a mum, i would make my daughter lose the baby as I don't want her to miss out on the rest of her childhood and she wouldn't be ready to raise a child let alone considering she is a child herself! best of luck to u!
2006-10-01 05:29:38 · answer #9 · answered by olive_sugar21 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't mean to sound unsympathetic but what was your daughter doing with a man old enough to be her father and who let her run around like that. Please do not blame your daughter or the man for your own failure to teach your daughter proper values and self-respect.
as for your daughter, unless you want your daughter to ruin her life you don't have too many options. To allow a 13 year old to bring a child into this world is unfair to both.
2006-10-01 05:15:49 · answer #10 · answered by pepper 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋