2006-09-30 21:03:31 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
I don't think there are any good pick-up lines, but I'll try...
Do you have a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in your pants. *drumroll*
Please don't laugh.
2006-09-30 21:13:55 · answer #1 · answered by ingredientmaster 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pick up lines are so clichéd most of the time.
I just improvise.
What am good at the most how to turn a girls turn down answer to a great success so I avoid an awkward situation and impress the girl.
Me: Can I have your phone number?
Girl: WHY?
Me: Just wondering if it's divisible by 3.
Me: Hola! Bonita
Girl: Your Spanish accent is stupid
Me: well my Spanish tutor was dyslexic
Got no more in my mind right now
2006-10-01 07:18:50 · answer #2 · answered by LEO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why? Do you just want to hear them or do you plan on using them on a guy lol I doubt it will work on a guy. I know a couple only I never use them. Ok here it goes:
1)Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You got fine written all over you.
2) There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.
3)Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!
4)When I saw you from across the room, I passed out cold and hit my head on
the floor...so I'm going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
5)Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes!
6)He: This must be the end of a rainbow
She:Why?
He: Because I've just found my pot of gold
7)Do you have a Band aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
8)Can I borrow a quarter? ["What for?"]
... I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the girl of my dreams. or it can be Can I borrow a quarter? ["What for?"] To call God and tell him that I found his missing angel.
there's more, but I think pick up lines should not be use on women because I went through something that I regret and I never plan on using another pick up line again for what happened. Anyways peace out and enjoy!
2006-10-01 04:30:40 · answer #3 · answered by what_it_do? 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
yeh, I use this one all the time and it seems to work......here it goes..........(usually said while I'm sitting at a bar, sometimes it works in church when I go alone)
Damn, My freaking wife is so lazy, she never takes care of the kids, and she expects me to do everything, So I end up washing the dishes by hand, doing the laundry, washing the kitchen floor, reading books to the young ones, mowing the grass, paying the bills and cooking 5 meals a week. Thank God for that culinary arts class I took last year, it showed me how to whip up gourmet meals in 20 minutes or less....and ....I just can't wait to finish the Sweedish massage school...which will happen in the same time I end up putting the addition on the house.
No one appreciates a good sweedish massage anymore.
[usually always gets a woman's interest!]
2006-10-01 04:24:52 · answer #4 · answered by cortical contusion 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
not quite a pick up line more like a put down guy: how do you like you eggs in the morning?
girl: unfertilized
I like it but thats just me
2006-10-01 05:36:03 · answer #5 · answered by Blue S 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Man i think i lost my number can i have yours?
If i could rearange the alphabet I would put U and I together...
2006-10-01 05:50:31 · answer #6 · answered by mel_b_g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
TRIPPLE TWINED ROPE FOLDED OVER CAN PICK UP A DECENT WEIGHT HA HA
2006-10-01 04:58:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i do, but last time i used it, i had to pick my teeth off the floor.
2006-10-01 04:18:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay, some of these are really lame, but there are some funny ones...
As she's leaving....Hey aren't you forgetting something? She: What? Me!
Don't worry about it. Nothing that you've ever done before counts. The only thing that matters is that we're together.
Hey...somebody farted. Let's get out of here.
Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart.
Hi. I suffer from amnesia. Do I come here often?
I have only three months to live. ..
I play the field, and it looks like I just hit a home run with you.
I'm sorry, were you talking to me? Her: No. Well then, please start.
If I followed you home, would you keep me?
My lenses turn dark in the sunshine of your love.
So there you are! I've been looking all over for YOU, the GUY of my dreams!
Your daddy must have been a baker, 'cause you've got a nice set of buns.
[Grab the ***] Pardon me, is this seat taken?
[ Look at her shirt label.] When they say, "What are you doing?" You respond: "Yep! Made in heaven!"
Hi. I would like to award you the {Whatever beer we were drinking} award for looking so good. Now if you will give me your name, number and other vital statistics i would like to enter you in our grand prize drawing which will win you an all expense paid date with me
Are you religious? Cause you are the answers to all my prayers.
You're like a dictionary, you add meaning to my life!
Is there a rainbow today? I just found the treasure I've been searching for!
It's my birthday! How about a birthday kiss? [Is it really your birthday?] No, but how about a kiss anyway?
If you were a laser, you'd be set on "stunning".
(person walks in, and you say:) And out of nowhere comes the sunshine!!
I'm wearing Revlon colourstay lipstick, want to help me test the claim it won't kiss off?
Go up to the person and ask for their hand. Draw a line across it and explain that its a really big river, and the bunny on this side (doesn't matter) really needs to get to the other side. Ask how he does it. Give cute little answers as to why the bunny can't cross the river (ie...bunny jump in river, bunny go *glubglubglub*.) When the person finally asks how the bunny is supposed to get across, give them the cute puppy eyes and say "I don't know, I just wanted to hold your hand
Excuse me, do you have any raisins? How about a date?
Your lips look so lonely.... Would they like to meet mine?
I have an "owie" on my lip. Will you kiss it and make it better?
You be the Dairy Queen and I'll be your Burger King: You treat me right, and I'll do it your way
Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?
Do you have a bandaid? Because I just scrapped my knee falling for you.
I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.
Giant polar bear (What?) It broke the ice.
Speak of the devil....or should I say "Angel"?
I'm a Love Pirate, and I'm here for your booty! ARRRGGGHHH!!!
As you walk by, turn around and say: Excuse me, did you just touch my ***? No. Damn!
Got two nipples for a dime?
(With hands on shoulders) Oh, those are shoulder blades, I thought they were wings.
Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!
Are you busy tonight at 3:00 A.M.?
Are you lost ma'am? Because heaven's a long way from here.
Are you O.K.? Because heaven's a long fall from here.
As she's leaving....Hey aren't you forgetting something? She: What? Me!
Baby, somebody better call God, cuz he's missing an angel!
Bond. James Bond.
Can I borrow a quarter? ["What for?"] I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the
girl of my dreams. OR: I want to call your mother and thank her.
Did it hurt? Woman: Did what hurt? When you fell out of heaven?
Do you come here often?
Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.
Don't worry about it. Nothing that you've ever done before counts. The only thing that matters is that we're together.
Excuse me, but I think I dropped something!!! MY JAW!!
Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart.
Hey...somebody farted. Let's get out of here.
Hi. I suffer from amnesia. Do I come here often?
How was heaven when you left it?
I didn't know that angels could fly so low!
I have only three months to live. ..
I must be lost. I thought paradise was further south.
I play the field, and it looks like I just hit a home run with you.
I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?
I'm sorry, were you talking to me? Her: No. Well then, please start.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
If I followed you home, would you keep me?
If you were a tear in my eye I would not cry for fear of losing you.
Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?
My lenses turn dark in the sunshine of your love.
So there you are! I've been looking all over for YOU, the girl of my dreams!
Stand still so I can pick you up!
Was you father an alien? Because there's nothing else like you on earth!
What time do you have to be back in heaven?
What was that sound? It was the sound of my heart breaking.
What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?
What's that in your eye? Must just be a twinkle.
What's your favorite position on extramarital sex?
What's your sign?
Where have you been all my life?
Would you touch me so I can tell my friends I've been touched by an angel?
Wouldn't we look cute on a wedding cake together?
Wow.
You look like an angel. Welcome to Earth.
You must be a hell of a thief 'cause you stole my heart from across the room.
Your daddy must have been a baker, 'cause you've got a nice set of buns.
Your legs must be tired because you've been running through my mind all night.
[Grab the ***] Pardon me, is this seat taken?
Can I have directions? ["To where?"] To your heart.
Was your father a thief? 'Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
[ Look at her shirt label.] When they say, "What are you doing?" You respond: "Yep! Made in heaven!"
Your eyes are blue, like the ocean. And baby, I'm lost at sea.
Ask a woman for the time. "10:30? So today is January 10,1999, at 10:30 PM, thanks I just wanted to be able to remember the exact moment that I met you."
"Pinch me." "Why?" "You're so fine I must be dreaming."
Your name must be Mickey because your so fine.
You're daddy must be a hunter because he sure caught a fox!"
You're daddy must be an archer because he sure shot a bulls eye!
Your daddy must play the trumpet, because he sure made me horny!
Ouch! My tooth hurts! Target: "Why?" Because you are soooo sweet!
You must be from Pearl Harbor, 'cause baby, you're the bomb.
You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.
Do you know karate? 'Cause your body is really kickin'.
Baby, if you were words on a page, you'd be what they call FINE PRINT!
Hi. I would like to award you the {Whatever beer we were drinking} award for looking so good. Now if you will give me your name, number and other vital statistics i would like to enter you in our grand prize drawing which will win you an all expense paid date with me.
You must be a Snickers, because you satisfy me.
Is your dad a terrorists? Cause you're the bomb.
Are you religious? Cause you are the answers to all my prayers.
You're like a dictionary, you add meaning to my life!
Say, you remind me of a pop tart. (Why?) You're cool cause you're hot!
If beauty were sunlight, you'd shine from a million light-years away.
Baby, you are the finest thing in the world. I could put you on a place and sop you up with a biscuit.
Hello. Cupid called. He says to tell you that he needs my heart back.
I must be a snowflake, 'cuz I've fallen for you.
Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, it's just a sparkle.
Is there a rainbow today? I just found the treasure I've been searching for!
You remind me of a magnet, because you sure are attracting me over here!
It's my birthday! How about a birthday kiss? [Is it really your birthday?] No, but how about a kiss anyway?
What's the name of your perfume? "Catch of the Day?"
If you were a laser, you'd be set on "stunning".
(person walks in, and you say:) And out of nowhere comes the sunshine!!
When I marry I wonder if God will be mad that I stole one of his angels.
I'm good at math. U+I=69
If stars would fall everytime I would think of you, the sky would soon be empty.
Hi. Your name must be (your car here) because my backseat has it written all over.
Excuse me, do I need to buy a ticket for your fantastic voyage?
I'm wearing Revlon colourstay lipstick, want to help me test the claim it won't kiss off?
Go up to the person and ask for their hand. Draw a line across it and explain that its a really big river, and the bunny on this side (doesn't matter) really needs to get to the other side. Ask how he does it. Give cute little answers as to why the bunny can't cross the river (ie...bunny jump in river, bunny go *glubglubglub*.) When the person finally asks how the bunny is supposed to get across, give them the cute puppy eyes and say "I don't know, I just wanted to hold your hand."
Mars? This is the advanced recon unit. Good news, I've found a couple of foxes.
Damn! Somebody needs to write explosive on you, cuz your the bomb!
Hey, is it just me, or are we destined to be married?
Do you remember Crayola Crayons? They used to have this color...Blizzard Blue. It was my favorite color and I could never figure out why. But I just realized why, your eyes...Blizzard Blue.
Something tells me you're sweet. Can I have a sample?
Excuse me, do you have any raisins? How about a date?
Your lips look so lonely.... Would they like to meet mine?
Is that a keg in your pants? 'Cause I'd love to tap that ***.
Hello. Are you taking any applications for a boy/girlfriend?
I have an "owie" on my lip. Will you kiss it and make it better?
(stand next to the girl) Hey do you think you could ask this girl to give me her name and number? (answer: Depends on who it is) Okay but keep it quiet because she is standing right next to me.
Hi, my name is Chris. I'm funny, financially stable, and have a very interesting DNA structure.
Can I take your picture? (Why?) Because I want Santa to know exactly what I want for Chirstmas.
(Open and close wallet quickly) Here's my "Fine Arts Connoisseur" diploma. You sure are a masterpiece.
Let's make like a fabric softener and Snuggle(TM)
(while looking at stars) Baby, I didn't see any stars in the sky tonight, the most heavenly body was sitting right next to me.
If you know a person's name: "Hi, [name]." How did you know my name? "Isn't every beautiful girl named that?"
See this pin? I want to prick you with it to see if you truly do bleed sunshine
You be the Dairy Queen and I'll be your Burger King: You treat me right, and I'll do it your way
Only in the corporate world...
[Pretend to read your hand, do so quite poorly] What is a nice girl like you doing in a place like this? (Huh?) [Lower left hand and raise right, read poorly] What's your sign?
Hi. My name is {name}. I'm running for president in 2012. And I could sure use your vote. Here...write down your number and I'll call you to discuss my platform.
If I could reach out and hold a star for everytime you've made me smile, I'd hold the sky in the palm of my hand.
Good evening. May a thorn sit down amongst the roses?
Many people will walk in and out of your life. But only lovers will leave a footprint on your heart. And you my dear have left one great leap on mine!
Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?
Do you have a bandaid? Because I just scrapped my knee falling for you.
I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.
What is your favorite color? (Answer) Mine too!
Giant polar bear (What?) It broke the ice.
(Put your fingers on the other's nipples) Hey, here's (name), comin' at you with the weather. Can I be your warm front?
Excuse me, does this tequila taste funny? (Hand them an untouched shot)
So, what do you like to do for fun? (Why?) 'Cause I'm gonna ask you out.
Well, I AM telepathic, and i can tell that you love me. Right? (NO!) Damn, I always get "love" and "lust" mixed up.
(Talk to her)Did i ever tell you you're my hero? You're everything I wish I could be? (Start Singing) I can fly higher than an eagle! (talking) Because (her name) you are the wind beneith my wings.
(close hand with nothing inside and give it to her) It's my breath from when you took it away (open palm while saying this)
Should I smile because we are friends, or cry because I know that is what we will ever be?
Speak of the devil....or should I say "Angel"?
When I look into your eyes, it is like a gateway into the world of which I want to be a part.
I'm here now. What were your other two wishes?
I'm a Love Pirate, and I'm here for your booty! ARRRGGGHHH!!!
I believe that it was Socrates who opined, "Know thyself." Whelp, I already know myself, how about I get to know you?
I put a drop of tear in the ocean last night for you. And I won't stop loving you until you find that tear drop.
Hey, where did your smile go? (Check back pocket) Here it is!
(Get as close as you can to the other, then stare at his/her lips) Can you feel it? There is some kinda sexual attraction. Can you feel it, too?
Hey baby. You got a jersey? (A jersey?...What for?) Because I need your name and number
Hi, I'm astronomer and I've been sent by the department to examine a heavenly body named XGY8... 6... 9'er... Er, wait. That heavenly body is you!
You be the biscuits and I’ll be the gravy, let us do breakfast sometime.
As you walk by, turn around and say: Excuse me, did you just touch my ***? No. Damn!
Do you have a Bandaid? Cos I just scraped my knee falling for you.
Do you have a map? Cos Honey, I just keep gettin lost in your eyes.
Do you think I could borrow that dress sometime?
Girl, you gotta be tired coz you been runnin through my mind all day.
Got two nipples for a dime?
Help, somethings wrong with my eyes - I just can't take them off you.
Hey baby, you must be a light switch, coz every time I see you, you turn me on!
Hi, I'm the new Milkman. Do you want it in the front or the back?
I think I feel like Richard Gere - I'm standing next to you, the Pretty Woman.
I'm sick. My medicine is to talk to you.
Was you Father an Alien? Cos honey on planet earth there's nothing else like you!
You're eyes are bluer than the atlantic ocean and baby, I'm all lost at sea.
You're like a dictionary - you add meaning to my life!
You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear
2006-10-01 16:47:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋