would u perfer having a child before or after you husband is deployed?
2006-09-30 16:07:44 · 9 answers · asked by A soldiers wife 4 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
yes my husband would be sad beacuse he missed the the baby whole life
2006-09-30 16:15:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Either is better than during (me!), but between the two...after.
If you have one after he comes home, first, congratulations, he came home! Second, the earliest you could have conceived is R&R, if not the week he gets home, so he'll be there for the pregnancy, the birth, and (hopefully if he doesn't get deployed again or hit by a bus) to help raise the child. He'll also have the pregnancy time to readjust to being home and settle back into things before there's a delicate new baby to care for.
If you have one before, sure you'll have a piece of him if he doesn't come home, but even if he does come home, he's still missed a major chunk of their childhood, not to mention you'll be raising the child alone at least for that time span.
During is going to suck. He's scheduled for R&R for about my due date, but if I go early, he'll miss it, and at most he'll only have 2 weeks to spend with us, less if he's here for the actual birth. It also means that while I'm waiting to, having, and recovering from giving birth--a time when I'll need his support, he'll be needing mine as much if not more because he's home on a break from war and will want quiet time to himself. What is he going to do with a brand new baby when he's twitchy and high strung from being in sector? Not to mention he'll be home to rest but unable to get any sleep.
2006-10-02 14:14:09 · answer #2 · answered by desiderio 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am not an army wife but i have a brother in the army and i can answer this through his wife's words.. She wants to have another child so much (her other daughter is 10) but she decided to wait until he got back to have another because #1 he wont miss out on the time that he is missing with his child #2 His wife wont have to do it all alone #3 He can get back on his feet when he gets home and spend some quality time with his wife catching up before they restart their family..
2006-09-30 23:19:48 · answer #3 · answered by sea_sher 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am an army wife..we have 5 children. my last two pregnancies i did alone. the birth of our 2 yr old i also did alone..but he was there for the birth of our twins. even though my husband misses the children when he is deployed it gives me something to do. i dont have time to sit and be depressed about missing him because the kids need me. i think this gives the spouses more strength, because you have to be strong for your children. in constantly reassuring your children that everything will be okay and that he will come home safe..you are reassuring your self at the same time and giving yourself the confidence to make it through one more day.
2006-09-30 23:40:51 · answer #4 · answered by ARMYWIFE 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I got pregnant right before he deployed and had our baby while he was home on midtour. We didn't mean to get pregnant, and I had wanted to wait until afterwards. I definately think after deployment is best.
2006-09-30 23:52:26 · answer #5 · answered by Stephanie G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally for me, I would prefer after. I know my husband would be heartbroken if he missed that much of our child's life.
2006-09-30 23:12:17 · answer #6 · answered by TRUE PATRIOT 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
before
2006-09-30 23:46:50 · answer #7 · answered by nita 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely AFTER,because he will miss everything and you need his support too.
2006-10-04 09:21:28 · answer #8 · answered by Sunshine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
after:)
2006-10-01 15:43:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋