why am i still homesick and always crying on the weekends?

Question

i been in school now for a little more than a month now and still find my self crying all day on the weekends i am writing this with tears strolling down my face and want know if its normal to still be homesick after a month of school.. im having trouble making friends since im really shy and afraid that people are always judging me. i got to art school (University of the Arts) and the problem is there is no student cencert or campus life since its in the city. but i really want to stop crying every weekend

Answer 1

Go easy on yourself. My son loves his school. He went in open minded- and figured that he was starting with a totally clean slate.
No one knew you before. You get to reinvent yourself. So, you think you were shy. Now's the time to act as if you are not. Go to a counsellor and talk about your feelings. Get them out of your system and find out that the world is not as hurtful as it seems.

You'd be doing yourself a huge favor if you opened up and let yourself be vulnerable to friendships. Join a group. Volunteer on campus. Ask people questions about themselves. Some are just as scared and lonely as you are.

In any event, you can always email or IM your friends back home.
Read- join a book club (or two). Find out what makes you an indivudual and embrace it. The college years can be the best and most fun years of your life. Don't hold yourself back because you are shy.

If being shy has always been a problem for you- a doctor can give
you a prescription that may relax you. It may just change your life. You won't be as anxious and apprehensive when in new situations--- and generally, that's the only change. I highly recommend that you try that route if you can't shake your depression. (Maybe you'll need something for mild depression-
a doctor could just take the edge off those feelings until you can handle them yourself. There is nothing wrong with being depressed. I think most people get depressed- and can use a boost every now and then. This change of being in a new situation with no old friends, family, pets, etc can make someone
depressed. You may just need a little Wellbutrin or something.

Good luck to you- No one is judging yourself. You are just self-conscious and there is help for you. :)

Good luck.

Answer 2

I know how you feel. I was exactly like that when i moved away for school my first time, I too am very shy and wanted to make friends but found it very hard and I think that is what allowed me to be homesick for the whole time I was away. It is hard when you don't really have anything to do or anywhere to go and it is very depressing... I ended up moving back home but that doesn't have to be the case. You need to push yourself and I know it is hard but try to think about how lonely you feel and how sad that makes you and try to get to know a few people or even go in to a coffee shop and grab a coffee even if it is by yourself, it gets you out and at least seeing other people rather than being home alone wishing you had someone. I still am extremly shy and it is weird like I can talk to people in school and everything but I don't hang out with anyone outside of my school, my boyfriend and I both just recently moved away and as it stands I have NO friends, it's horrible but thankfully I do have my boyfriend so I am not stuck home all the time. I really hope things work out for you, Just really try to get yourself out there. With time you will make friends and get to know more people, it just sucks in the meantime. Good luck. :)

Answer 3

You could try going to the library or to concerts, movies, church, or school activities. I'm sure there may be a couple that might judge you as being unfriendly because of your shyness. You have to force yourself to speak to people and try to make conversation. It will be hard at first, but eventually you will start to come out of your shyness. I was shy as a teenager too. I had a couple of friends but was afraid to speak to people i didn't know. I became a salesperson selling products on the party plan. I had to get up in front of people and do a presentation and demonstration of the products. It helped me to get over my shyness. I still have a little problem with it occasionally, but not very often. Hubby tells me I am too quiet sometimes. Sometimes I just don't have anything to say and I'm more comfortable just listening.
I know it is hard to be away from home for the first time. It will get easier, but you need to stop dwelling on your homesickness and work on finding new friends...they are out there. Find another girl who is shy and make friends with her. Good luck in your art classes. I do artwork too. Express your feelings in your work. It's good therapy.

Answer 4

Honey,it is normal to cry and be upset when you have a dramatic life style change.When you leave the safety net of home it can be hard.But instead of crying,go to the library,go to the movies and art museums.Take tours of areas in the city and learn about the environment you are now living in.My son went to college at the age of 16 with a special scholarship for gifted students.The first 2-3 months were hard b/c he too is a shy person.It is now 5 years later and he is a wonderful young man.He reached out to things that interested him.Try learning new things.Learn to play pool or join a gymn.Don't get caught up int he party life style,the outcome is not good.

Answer 5

If this is your first time away from your home, your support network, your family and friends it is understandable that you would feel homesick. I felt homesick when I moved away from home to go to college in NY. For me homesickness hit me the second semester after being away from home lost its excitement in the first semester. Some ways to beat it are to make new friends or to engross yourself in your studies and your work. I understand that it is tough for you to make friends because you are shy, but a safe way to make friends is to actively participate in class. I found that when I participated in class my comments would strike up conversations with other people in the class soon people were approaching me. Also the more I participated in the course the more I was interested in the course and this helped me focus on the weekends. I would also recommend you join student organizations, the main purpose of these organizations is to meet new people. If your so shy you cannot do either then maybe you should speak with your school therapist, he or she may recommend other things for you to do.

Answer 6

Sweety, I moved away from home when I was 18 yrs old. I am now 40 and still 3000 miles from my family and I still have days when I cry for them. This is natural and especially if you are close to your family. This will get better with time. Try to get involved in a local church where you can get involved in a college group that is small and more intimate and a good way of making friends and gaining support. Plus, you will have people praying for you. Also, when you are homesick, email your family, call them or write them. We have gotten away from writing good old fashion letters and when I moved, it was so great to get regular mail from my family. It always cheered me up. Hang in there sweety and you can email me anytime if you want a friend. I am a mom of two college aged kids and know what that can be like. My heart and prayers go out to you. Also, try getting into a christian chat room and chatting with others who can support you and make good friends with but be smart about it. Use good sense in using internet of course. God bless you and hang in there.

Answer 7

I might check in with the school counselor to get some ideas to help you overcome your shyness. I was counted absent the first entire semester of kindergarten because I could not say "here" when the teacher was taking attendance! I did get over it but it took about 40 years. It would be best to get over it sooner, rather than later. The counselor will give you ideas on how to meet people outside of school, in the city. Are you in contact with your family? It's okay to be homesick - but its nice to meet other people, too, and have some fun outside of class. Please try and take that first step -- and see your student adviser or counselor. It won't be the first time that he/she will have heard this from a student - guaranteed. Good luck - and chin up!

Answer 8

i didn't eat for my first 2 weeks away from home. But i was trying to make myself feel ok about being away from everything that was 'normal' to me. Its a change its going to take you time. You can always try talking to friends, family, and look for a counselor near school 9 out of 10 ppl seeing them are becuase of homesickness. Don't feel bad taht you feel bad. its normal.

Get involved. That's what helped me. Try something you normally did like afts and crafts with friends. The time with friends will help.

Answer 9

It is normal for you to still be home sick but to stop crying you should try writting or visitng your family on the weekends. To make new friends you have to talk to people and to try and get out of your room and go and have fun. The people who judge you are people who have issues and don't know how to deal with them so just ignore them and keep doing what your doning just don't cry.

Answer 10

if u make friends you will most likely no longer be homesick...and since u said ur shy, and dont make friends easily...here is what u need to do..get over it!! sounds hard but, just put yourself out there, and go up to someone and be friendly...the world will not end! and u have no reason to care what other people think of u.... f**k them!!! if they are judging u thats their problem not yours...so just try and not be shy and just put yourself out there and you will most likely get over your homesickness becuase youll be too busy making new friends. and besides..crying every day in your room isnt going to make your family any closer. so just try your best not to.