Should a child who is afraid of the water be forced to learn to swim?

Question

The kids are both five, neither can swim, and we live in Florida. One of us says they should be forced to take swimming lessons, the other is concerned they will be more afraid of the water if the lessons are forced.

Any thoughts?

Answer 1

Yes, for their own safety, they should learn to swim. Check with your local YMCA - they usually have classes geared toward children. I'm sure they've dealt with kids who are afraid of the water many times.

Answer 2

Of course, the word "forced" makes me uncomfortable. Instead, lets try "encouraged" instead.

With that out of the way, deciding on how to encourage them depends on how afraid they are of the water and what caused that fear.

If either are truly afraid, swimming lessons may not be a good place to start since the focus is on swimming, not getting over a fear of the water. Instead, I would work with each child individually, without the other (or any other distractions) around. The child should feel he/she has your undivided attention (and protection).

The goal is to entice the child into the water at a speed the child feels comfortable with, providing plenty of encouragement along the way. At no point should the child feel he/she is alone without your immediate protection.

At the same time, you want to build confidence with comments like; "You're not afraid of the water. Look at you. You swim like a fish."

At some point, the child will have the confidence to strike out a little more on his/her own. Stay nearby for immediate support, but don't interfere if things are going well. If things goes bad (the child gets nervous or panics), don't make a big deal out of it. Instead, point the child at a safer direction or goal.

If everything goes smoothly, in an hour or two (depending on the child), the child will be well on the way to getting over any fear. Now is the time to work with the other child, not letting the first child near the second until both are feeling a lot more confident around water. At that point, they will likely encourage each other.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Obviously, it isn't a good idea to shove a fearful child into a pool even if he/she is wearing water wings. However, more children drown in the country annually than most people know. Swimming is a potentially life-saving skill. I personally was in a pool with my mother when I was still an infant.

Try checking out a local Y. They often offer swimming lessons just for kids. The instructors are properly trained and generally work well with children. A plus is that they are around other children their age also learning to swim. That could help.

Answer 4

Your children need to learn to swim. Do a little research and find a local YMCA or municipal pool and ask them about their swim lessons programs. Teaching a child to swim is easier than you think. Go to the pools and watch them train others and see if they make it fun. Don't wait the young they start the easier it will be. I took my 14 year old when she was 5 she was swimming the pool in less than a week she knows all the strokes now and swims very well. You can get your kids started in a fun way and they will be made very comfortable and have lots of confidence. Do the research and get started...its worth it

Answer 5

I don't believe that a child who is afraid of anything should be forced to face that fear until they are ready to face it. That being said...I do think the child should be encouraged to face the fear with the help of the child's beloved parents and/or a professional.

My son was very afraid of deep water. My husband bought him a life jacket and would hold him up in the deep end. He never let go of him. My son loves water but only if he can stand up in it. Eventually, my son wanted to learn to swim and asked for swimming lessons, which he took over the past summer. It did so much for his self-esteem. I am convinced that we were right not to force him to take the swimming lessons until he was ready for them.

Answer 6

Find a good teacher -- go private lessons who will teach the kids one at a time, preferably in the pool of someone with whom they are comfortable. Check with YMCA or the public pool and see if you can find a lifeguard or someone who teaches children on the side. I live in Arizona, and for the last decade or two, we have lost the equivalent to a kindergarten class every summer because people think their kids won't be curious around water. I got my kids private lessons, and yes, it was expensive, but you can't pay for peace of mind. (I also never leave them alone, just to clarify.)
A good teacher will make them feel comfortable in the water, and then allow them to get in at their own pace. If you are afraid of the water, the kids will pick that up, too, so you may want to get lessons for yourself to show the kids that adults can learn new things and not be afraid.

Answer 7

The emotional trauma could be devastating and could lead to the child never wanting to swim. Parents are supposed to support and help their children through hard times. Instead of worrying about your children knowing how to swim, start out with a small plastic pool in the yard with very little water in it. Stand in it, have water balloon fights, blow bubbles, just put floating toys in it and let the child push it around...boat races, etc. Ease into the lessons.............it will be much better for the child.

Answer 8

I think forcing may be too strong, but swimming lessons should definitely be non-negotiable. Everyone should know how to swim, and kids will probably be less afraid if they have the upper hand against the water.
Get in touch with the YMCA. They should have swim coaches who are experienced with kids like yours. They will know how to get your kids to be less fearful of the water, and hopefully learn to love it!

Be blessed!

Answer 9

No they should not be forced, because that only adds to trauma, it is quite natural to have a fear of the water. Give these kids time to mature a bit more before offering swimming lessons, they just aren't ready now.

Answer 10

Yes, for 2 separate reasons.

Probably the most important is that we as humans grow by facing our fears. If we never faced the fear of falling down, we would never walk, or ride a bike, or give a speech in front of the class, or give a speech in front of the board of directors, or in front of the world...

As children grow they learn to face their fears, but it was only with mom and dad's encouragement did we speak our first word or take our first step. Likewise swimming in water.

The other reason is that swimming is a life skill that can sometime save their life, someone else's or even yours.

That said, choose a program that you are most comfortable with. The program I started my son with was an "at your own pace" thing with 26 different stations. The first was putting your feet in the water, and when you got comfortable with that you went to the next stage of getting in the water. For some children it took a year or two to get their head under the water, and in the same time frame other children were able to complete the entire program. On the other end of the spectrum, there is an extremely well respected lady here, with a waiting list of close to 250 names who teaches children to swim in 4 weeks. She starts off by holding them in her arms and jumping in the water with them, she then holds them until they stop crying.... sounded cruel to me, but people claim that nobody has left that class without being able to swim across a pool.

There are many different programs, and they all seem to work, but as the parent (and I assume you aren't teaching them yourself) it will be up to you as to how you feel most comfortable with the method.