Waitresses, random people I deal with, even a few co-workers. And people answering my questions on this site.
Does anyone else HATE this? I'm not your girlfriend.
How can I make it stop?
2006-09-30 09:26:59 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I actually prefer Dumb*ss. Honey (as well as hun, sweetie, sweetheart, etc.) is just dismissive. As in, "That no a good idea, honey."
I'd much prefer something confrontational. That I know how to deal with.
2006-09-30 09:37:01 · update #1
Yes, I hate it too. It is inapporpriate and unprofessional to call a fellow co-worker or anyone you meet in a professional honey. If someone isn't related to me or married to me they should not call me honey.
2006-09-30 10:41:06 · answer #1 · answered by Lov'n IT! 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Calm down honey, I mean hun,....I mean sweetie....I mean babe....I mean toots...I mean love
Sorry if I bothered you with that beginning. You just have to take it easy. People don't really mean anything by it. They are not referring to you as being thier better half, but to just give you a compliment. Better than someone calling you a snobb, slut, or b*tch. It is just a compliment. I can see where you are coming from because I have female friends and one of them from back in the days always got bothered when people would simply touch her. She was my best friend, so I guess I was not able to annoy her. But I would not always try and touch her. She was my true friend and even though she and I are cute, there was no sexual attraction. She was just cool peoples. If you want these compliments to stop, just give a little attitude when the next person says it. But then they will start calling you a snob. Enjoy the compliments. When my female friends call me hun and sweetie, I have no problem with it. I actually enjoy the compliment. It is just them telling me they think I am a sweetie.
2006-09-30 09:45:27 · answer #2 · answered by Mitchell B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Develope your 'darkness'...say things commandingly. Watch Star Wars are pretend you are Darth Vader...now do it without the mask, the iron lung, and all the black clothing. Reach down deep into your anger and find the growling beast-mask, and put it on purposefully.
This will be easier online than in person at first, and in person a lot of people that you think like you are going to have a problem.
You're probably female, somewhat short, and have a cute face and/or a soft voice.......so people that you interact with automatically feel that you are submissive and either instinctively want to protect you, or manipulate you, or both.
Another way to develope it is to get a dog and train her/him yourself - - - dogs obey growled commands long before they will even notice a whined command or a barked command. Whine = submission and bark = alarm.
Equality is a wonderful idea, but as a tall & fat man with 'large man syndrome' (opposite of short man syndrome), I have noticed that everyone either wants to dominate & manipulate you or submit to & manipulate you. I get the latter, and it is just as frustrating. No one is actually looking for equals, and the only way I have found is to establish my dominance (thru displaying my darkness), and then not use it except to establish that I will not be manipulated.
2006-09-30 09:42:01 · answer #3 · answered by raxivar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL - I know what you're talking about. What is it with waitresses who call you honey? It's like, is that a requirement for being a waitress? I've had waitresses YOUNGER than me (I'm on ly 28) call me honey! What's up?!?!
Honestly, I don't think there is anything you can do about it - it would be awkward and most likely offensive to the stranger who called you honey - they were just being nice. It's probably better to just let it go.
2006-09-30 09:31:37 · answer #4 · answered by natureutt78 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I guess it is just a habit, and I am sure that most of the time it is said in an entirely innocent way.
I accept that you might find it somewhat offensive, but to object to it might well appear to be churlish, and I am sure you would not want that!
In the UK, the same kind of thing happens, but the words used are different, depending on the area. It is usually not objected to. They can vary from 'pet', 'my love', 'sweetheart', to 'dear', 'dearie', 'gorgeous', and many others.
Would you really prefer to be addressed as 'Miss', or 'Madam'?
Try not to be offended by this - surely the fact that people address you in such a way indicates that they see you as a friendly and pleasant person?
2006-09-30 10:19:51 · answer #5 · answered by aarcue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wear a name badge, cause you would be just as offended if they said lady, girl, female, human, or anything else descriptive. It is a way to show affection/understanding that has nothing to do with wanting you on any level. If the name badge thing wont help, just tell anyone who you think MIGHT call you honey that you are too insecure with yourself and your relationships to be able to tolerate the kindness of a gentler term then dumb*ss. DUMB*SS(see, I did not call you honey)
2006-09-30 09:33:21 · answer #6 · answered by scornedgypsy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
"Honey, baby, dear, sugar, cupcake etc etc" are word that are accepted in society to be used as substitutes to names and expressing a certain fondness or attitude towards the person.
In some cases, when, they are overused without emotional charge, they mostly mean that the person is either not taking you seriously or they are not serious enough about what they are sayng.
Either way, don`t get irritaded. What you can do is to not use them to people, who are not your boyfriend. And, you can tell others that you don`t want them to use it about you, because you find this kind of attitude inappropriate or not serious.
2006-09-30 09:36:53 · answer #7 · answered by Ateviel 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
now hun....calling you honey doesnt mean they want you for a girl friend....for some people it means being nice and polite, try taking it that way a little, honey....and hun, worry about the big things in life, this is really trivial. sugar, you're just too cute i suppose and it makes grown ups want to talk cute to you, sweety...some women think its condisending, these are the same ones that get upset when a man holds a door open for them or opens the car door for them...its just respecting, get over yourself
2006-09-30 09:33:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think it's just a term of endearment. I'm not old, but I do it all the time. I call people sweetie, babe, baby, girl, etc. For me, it's just a way of being a little friendlier. Think of it like that and not that people are being condescending. In today's world, where many people are so rude, I think it's nice that we still use these terms with each other.
2006-09-30 09:33:39 · answer #9 · answered by Apple21 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Got an answer for you, stay home never go out again. People bug you with all the nice gestures, then I see no point of you going to school, work or any place for that matter. You can't take it than you will just have to stay away from every one. I am pretty sure not every one call you these names, but it bugs you to no end just stay away from people.
2006-09-30 11:21:56 · answer #10 · answered by bloody pulp 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋