is it rude of someone Jewish to say to you" How was your Rosh Hashanah (sp?)? when you are not Jewish at all?

Question

My grandparents were French & Greek, I guess I look a little Mediterrean? (straight hair, normal nose, no stereotypes).
anyway this Jewish guy in my class at college talked to me in the library & first thing he said was "how was your Rosh Hashana (sorry spelling)"? I don't know this guy AT ALL, so why does he think I'm Jewish?

My last name may be ambiguous, it's certainly not obviously Jewish.

Isn't that a little rude. I don't like to be judged on my looks, how does he know I'm not an atheist or a Buddhist or whatever?

Answer 1

Sounds like you are jumping to conclusions. Why didn't you simply ask him, "I'm not Jewish, why do you ask?"

Answer 2

No more rude than one someone says to me "Merry Christmas" - happens all the time, and I wear a yarmulke for heaven's sake!

I think the trick is not to get upset when someone says something well-meaning and maybe doesn't know any better. In any event, Rosh Hashana is considered the anniversary of creation - so it would kind of be applicable to everyone, even though only Jews (and probably Noachides) celebrate it.

I'm curious as to how you describe yourself, though. "Normal nose," and "no stereotypes"? Are you saying that you expect Jews to have abnormal noses, or that they should fall into some kind of stereotype? Why do you think it is that it irks you so much that someone mistook you for Jewish? I can't say I'd be upset if I were mistaken for the wrong religion, ethnicity or nationality (it does happen from time to time). I'd say that's a lot more rude than a Jew inquiring as to how your Rosh Hashana went! In any event, I don't think a Buddhist would be bothered by this like you were (those guys are way too centered for that), and an atheist shouldn't care either (unless he really hates religion with a passion - and for the record, there are a LOT of secular Jews out there).

What IS your last name, by the way? Maybe it's less ambiguous than you think. It's possible you have a Jewish male ancestor, in which case you would have wound up with his name but not his Jewishness (Jewishness being passed either from mother to child, or attained through conversion).

So, maybe try not to be bothered when someone asks how your Rosh Hashanah was (which I agree is kind of odd, but not rude), and we'll try not to get upset when people wish us a "Happy Yom Kippur" (this is like saying "Happy Lent") or a "Merry Christmas". Deal?

Answer 3

I wouldn't say "rude". "Useless", maybe, as you obviously don't celebrate it.

I wouldn't be offended if anyone had said to me "merry Christmas!" and asked me how I spent my holiday (even though I do not celebrate it). You may say it's different, as Christmas is not a very religious holiday, and most of its symbols are seasonal, but so is Rosh Hashanah (you weren't so wrong with the spelling (-:).

All in all- the guy just wanted to start a conversation with you. Maybe you should have said "There wasn't Rosh Hashanah. I'm not Jewish", but I don't think you should be offended.

Answer 4

When somebody says, "How was your holiday?", it means "How were you doing the day that the holiday occured." For instance, I'm Jewish. I spend my Christmases studying and sometimes by seeing a movie. As you can see, I don't observe Christmas, but the question is asking what I did on December 25. As for your situation, just say, "I don't celebrate Rosh Hashanah." (Rosh Hashana is an acceptable spelling.) If your friend asks you despite this knowledge, just say what you did while he was observing the holiday.

Answer 5

Ya know, maybe he likes you asked you that in hopes that you would say something like "Oh! My Rosh Hashanah was great! How about yours?" and then y'all could connect on so many levels. He's just a nice Jewish guy looking for a nice Jewish girl :)

Answer 6

Consider this: is it rude of someone Christian to say to you "How was your Christmas when you are not Christian at all?"

It happens to Jews all the time. We all tend to think that others are like us, no matter what religion we are.

You were mistaken for being Jewish; that's all. Consider it a compliment!

Answer 7

Perhaps he "thought" you were Jewish and he was trying to make a connection with you. Lots of people change their surnames and have over the years. No, it's not rude, it was his mistake though....so responding, "I don't celebrate" it would be a sufficient response.

Answer 8

It's not rude, don't chose to be offended. Just say, "Pretty uneventful seeing as I'm not Jewish - but thanks for asking." We Christians have certainly "Merry Christmas" ed the crap out of non-christians for 2000 years now without concern about offending them.

Answer 9

Tell him your not a Jew, then say how is your Ramadan