Why do men want to jump into bed with you the minute after they meet you? Why dont they want to get to know a woman before they do that? Do I have a right to tell a man no on the first date? Am I being disrespectful for not wanting to have sex the minute we meet? Whats wrong with having a couple of dates before going to bed with someone? I dont want to be looked at as easy am I making the right decisions? Is there any man out there who values a woman's view on this subject, and would take the time to get to know her before having sex with her? What are your thoughts guys? Be Honest.
2006-09-29 23:50:01 · 16 answers · asked by Tequila_Rose 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Let's see if I can answer this question in many parts:
The reason why a lot of guys want to sex you up when you two first meet is because they are desparate and are thinking with the wrong head. LOL. Some guys don't realize that getting a woman to bed takes a lot of romantic work. Also a lot of women aren't down with screwing on a first date.
Which leads me to the next part of the question. Some guys are looking for the easy sex. Once again, desparation comes to play. Personally I like to know a woman thourough before taking her to bed. I want to be comfortable with her before bedding her. I also want to know what kind of woman I am taking to bed. There are way too many diseases in this world. Playing with a hand grenade makes more sense than sex on a first date.
No you are not disrespectful for not wanting sex upon first contact or first date for that matter. That is your preference and if he isn't down with that then it better he leaves and go find a hooker. LOL. I like sex better than the next guy, but I do not expect or want sex upon first contact.
Likewise, I usually adhere to an 8 date rule before sex. I want to date and get to know you inside and out before making serious love. Once again, the playground is dangerous and want to get comfortable with you first. The more in tune I am with a woman, the better and more meaningful the sex is.
I value a woman's point of view. I was raised around a bunch of females. This is where I sometimes seem to go wrong at times, but I like to think I grew up with an insight in a woman's world. I am willing to wait for a woman to be ready to get with me on a sexual level. After all, do I have a choice besides leaving her?
2006-09-30 00:09:32 · answer #1 · answered by davester1970 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
We like sex, OK. But yes we have little respect for easy. This is because we also want faithfulness and loyalty. Because of biology a woman will always know if the child she just had is her child. A man can never be as sure that the child she just had is his. There is a tremendous amount of trust required to become a parent. If a woman is screwing around how much trust can a man generate. If a man screws around the woman often will ignore it or forgive it as long as she is sure the man is not going to leave her unsupported.
So for a long term relationship you are very correct. No man wants to commit to the town pump or whatever slang term you use. Very few men want to raise other men's children.
It is a double standard but thats life.
2006-09-30 00:01:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Your question should read why do most men. You are 100% right in saying no. The longer you resist the more respect any decent man will get for you. Love comes first and once both parties agree on it then sex. Sex is also not something you plan. It should be a spontaneous action.
Yes I am a man.
2006-09-29 23:59:05 · answer #3 · answered by robsnor 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is not always like that.
But, they are sooner ready for going to bed, because they usually got aroused much faster than we are, and much more obviously than we do.
Some of them want to get to know woman before, and when they pass their teen-years, that number of some is supposed to become most of them. yet, there always was and always will be guys and girls who just need to count new partners.
Yes, you have all rights to have no on the first and second and third date. And as long as you are not ready. But, also you have right to say yes on the first date if you are ready for that.
He would be disrespectful if he got angry. It is sad true that we are considered as easy if we go to bed on first date, but really only measure should be emotions.
2006-09-30 00:16:39 · answer #4 · answered by no one 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
you have every right to NO on the first date even on the 20th date you have the right to say NO never be pressured into having sex..if a man respects you he'll wait untill your ready if hes just looking for sex then hes not worth it most men wouldnt consider having a relationship with a girl that gave it up on the first night!!!keep respecting yourself and never do anything you dont want to no matter what.....
2006-09-29 23:59:39 · answer #5 · answered by keevy 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If you want an honest answer, all guys are looking to get laid as easily as they can. If they can't wait a couple of dates, then they never really wanted to get to know you.
Personally, I wouldn't bang unless there was mutual affection between you. Unless you are just into some animalistic sex which can be fun too. But if you want something deeper, don't give it up too soon.
2006-09-29 23:56:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
It takes 2 to tango...It is your fault and you are to be blamed.
You took the lead, and you picked garbage so what do you think that you should expect: treasure...
You choose the reflection of your father figure, and you choose the person based on your animal instinct.
If people start to choose their partners based on their level of eduction, and their morals and values. (not religion/not money)
You do not pick your partner just because he/she are in good shape or are sexually appealing to your needs, or they have financial stability.
You do not pick your partner from the street and you have no idea the kind of person he/she might be.
When women respect men and when men respect women.
Every mother is to be blamed for that she brings her kids to look at their partners as a sexual toy, practice premarital sex and that includes kissing, and use people as their means of exerting their trash inside them.
You asked for it, you got it...
Stop this craziness...
2006-09-30 00:30:48 · answer #7 · answered by skystriker65 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
It's your body so YES you have the control and RIGHT to refuse anyone at anytime, If you don't want to have sex after any date that is your prerogative.
I was once told 'Don't have sex with any women who you wouldn't want to have your baby'.
2006-09-30 00:03:06 · answer #8 · answered by usaf.primebeef 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
not all men r the same just some bad luck
hope one day u get a man who appreciate your values n qualities which r not determine by being in bed
good luck
2006-09-30 00:20:29 · answer #9 · answered by secret &trade 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Its like he wants curry and you want rice!
You don't like curry so he is bad.
But if he does not like rice, you are not bad! He is making it clear what he wants and quickly without wasting your / his time.
Why should U think YOU are cheap if He ask for it so quickly? He is different then you and makes it very clear, fast and loud!
Take it or leave it!
2006-09-30 00:26:21 · answer #10 · answered by ~Raju~ 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋