he is the only one i have ever loved.we were never together because he had a gf i had a bf at the time and because we were all friends we just didnt take it any further than to tell eachother how special we were to each other.he moved because it was to hard for us not being able to be with each other.it hurt me so much knowing i was probably not gonna see him again.and its been 9 years since that.but i still love him.i am married now and i cant love my husband the way i want to because deep inside me,i am still in love with him.and sometimes even compare my husband to him, like he would never do this to me,or he would do it this way instead.all i have from him is a kiss.a good bye kiss.i dont think im ever gonna find him to find out if he still loves me. and he probably dont even remember me.but i want to be able to love my husnband the way i love him.why am i still in love with him anyway?i believe he is my soulmate,and im still sad that we could never be together.how to deal with it
2006-09-29 19:37:14 · 14 answers · asked by super girl 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If I were you, I'd probably find this guy out and then find something about him that really bugs me, so I'd get over him. I'd probably still stick with the husband because this is the present, not the past.
Life is too short to regret not doing anything, and i'd rather just get it over with.
2006-09-29 19:41:24 · answer #1 · answered by what? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trying to forget him will never work. I know, I tried for many years before giving up. The best thing to do is to remember him fondly, but to also remember that life doesn't always work out the way we want it to. Besides, no good can come out of continuing your obsession with him: either it'll break up your marriage, or you'll discover that he's turned into a royal jerk...and yet you'll still love him because, by now, you're not in love with him for him, but with the memory you have of the way he was. Just drop it, and when you do remember him, remember that it was a long time ago.
2006-09-30 02:46:47 · answer #2 · answered by mashfanficchick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I truly believe that once you love someone, you will continue to love them for a lifetime, but not all love relationships last a lifetime. There are many different kinds of love, you may love this man in a different way than you love your husband whom you chose to have a lifetime relationship with. I think the fact that it was a love that never got the chance to progress left you feeling wondering what if. Stop wondering what if ...and start wondering what it is that's missing from your marriage that's making you turn your attention to something that will never be. You need to give your marriage the attention it deserves, remember what it was that made you fall in love with your husband and cherish the fact that he chose you to spend the rest of his life with. You are a lucky woman to have loved twice in your lifetime, many people leave this world and never experience a true love.
2006-09-30 02:46:42 · answer #3 · answered by Cynthia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you had nothing with him and everything with your husband...cant u see that you are being played by your mind...people can feel what u feel over the internet and the fact that u guys didnt get together probably made it easier for you to make up perfect romantic fantasys inside your mind and of course they are all flawless nothing like real life...stop being a child u are in love with nothing but your own creation which doesnt exist...once u guys do get together it will be exacly the oppsit as to what you think of him, true love or soul mates are all about commitment not how much they are attracted to each other, get over your child play the faster the better
2006-09-30 02:43:22 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You never forget your first love. You are right you were in love with that guy. You had to be in love with your husband at one point.To me in love is the newness of a relationship & love is something that is strong & deveoploed in time & that is what I hope you got with your husband. Give yourself a break & let go of your past & see what the future has for you. "The today" is what you got right now and what really counts.
2006-09-30 02:48:05 · answer #5 · answered by "karma" 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to make an effort of trying to forget the feeling since you are already married. a memory/feeling cannot be erased if you continue to nourish it in your brrain; always going back to the days that you were together or the time that you spent with each other. technically, we cannot choose to delete such memories but we can make a choice not to linger in them. you also have to acknowledge that you are in the process of healing and you need to accept feelings which you do not really admit to yourself. the road to healing is never easy, but it is possible. i've been there and i am totally healed...
2006-09-30 02:51:32 · answer #6 · answered by janna 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you're really determined to forget him just focus at your husband and just enjoy your life now. things happen for a reason. he moved because he can't fight for your love. he would never move to another place if he really loves you. just accept the fact that he leaves you and if he ever comes back just ignore him because now you have a better life without him, a husband that loves you, and a hasbund that can fight for your love. appreciate all the things around you and dont ever regeret things.
2006-09-30 03:03:59 · answer #7 · answered by ♥pixie08♥ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember he is married now and that you really never had a true relationship and love the man you are with. This is my suggestion , but I can't seem to follow it myself. I will never stop thinking about my first love.
2006-09-30 02:42:46 · answer #8 · answered by Teacher 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know how, but im trying to do the same thing. it's only been like 2 days since we broke up, but i still love her and dont tink i can ever take a relationship on fully coz of her, she'll still be in my mind. well, if u find out tell me! gud luck!
2006-09-30 02:41:46 · answer #9 · answered by pogiboy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i understand your feelings. I suggest you that try to learn something about religion....any religion. this will help you to understand your husband more and love him more. i don't think you can "meet" that person and can live with him in this life. though i don't believe in second life but when i see the incidents like yours, i believe you may had a past life together in witch you both were close to each other. you can also learn something about "telepathy" it may help you to communicate with "that" person to see if can tell you more about him.
2006-09-30 02:47:29 · answer #10 · answered by West L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋