I intended to post this at a certain seduction community website, but know that it wouldn't go down well. It's a definite case of one-itis and isn't in the spirit of sarging. If I've lost you already, then go out and buy a copy of Neil Strauss' "The Game" before posting an answer here.
I have gotten to know a girl in one of my college classes. I thought it was looking good from the beginning. She didn't mention the fact that she had a boyfriend until the second time we met. The first time, we went out for a meal that evening, so it was very promising. Her boyfriend is quite obviously not the right person for her. He's just dropped out of college, is lazy and delivers pizzas. She is all of the opposite things. But, she doesn't want to leave him for fear of being alone.
I have some morals and do not feel I can just charge in a try to break them up. But, I know it's going to happen sooner or later. So, how can I show her that I can offer her everything she's looking for?
2006-09-29 15:27:47 · 14 answers · asked by JJ 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Some extra info:
We talk nearly every night on AIM. Unfortunately, we can't talk on the phone (as her boyfriend borrows hers in the evenings). The signals I'm receiving are very positive, yet she never calls me, as I think she's scared of "cheating" on her boyfriend. She told me that she has lied to him about what she was doing every time that we've hung out, so that he doesn't get jealous.
I don't want to start openly critizing her BF, although it would be very easy. But, I want her to see that none of those negatives would be present if we were together. They also fight a lot and, strangely, don't sleep in the same bed...
2006-09-29 15:34:48 · update #1
Just be as good a friend to her as you can. See if she wants ot grab a cup of coffee or something as 'friends'. Make sure she knows you're there for her.
2006-09-29 15:29:31 · answer #1 · answered by lillith6662000 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm a 22 year old girl you probably want a little of my help. Some pointers be open with her DO NOT try to be her friend cause that what she is going to think of you her friend. Do romantic stuff but at the same time innocent. Examples: If she get breakfast in the morning meet her somewhere buy her coffee. Everytime u see her get her a rose any color you choose to give her. Show her do not tell her all the time how you feel cause she will get tired of hearing it. Important pointers take her places where she could have a good laugh like a musical. Is romantic and comedy at the same time. Do not talk bad about her boyfriend thats the number one rule. Take her to art museums if she likes them and act very interest on the paintings and explaing your feelings toward the paintings. Be open about feelings, but have a limit cause girls do get scared too. So I hope I help you a little bit.
2006-09-29 15:41:41 · answer #2 · answered by Baby Jay 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well first of all u got to get close to her as a friend and show her what kind of person u are. Maybe talk about her situation u know try to be there for her and why not. And eventually when the time is right "just tell her". Tell her how u feel, what would you do for her if she was with u and last but not least show her, I mean if u really think u can offer her everything she is looking for you got to show her with actions not just words.
2006-09-29 15:34:25 · answer #3 · answered by shy girl 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If she has a fear of being alone, then she has co-dependency issues and would suffocate you...I mean, more than you think you want to be. You are wasting your time (of course who am I to tell you what to do with your time, right?) However I digress, I have to mention that you're a go getter, a charge forth type. She will inherently slow you down and stifle your best efforts with her. She must realize on her own what she needs to do and have in her life.
2006-09-29 15:34:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you already are by spending time with her and listening to her. You cannot imagine how much this means to a girl.
Don't worry, you are not breaking up anything. You sound like too nice a person to do that. Things that have to happen, will happen. Fact is, she likes your company and she opened up to you. Sounds like a good start.
2006-09-29 15:31:08 · answer #5 · answered by doctryluv 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Send her some flowers and a card with a brief message telling her so! I hope this works out for the both of you if she does not give the response that you hope for move on with your life! I don't understand her not telling you about him until the second date with you!
2006-09-29 15:34:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just be nice to her. Go places with her and some mutual friends and get her talking about stuff that's important in life. Not kidding. Have seen it work for some guys and gals.
2006-09-29 15:30:25 · answer #7 · answered by *babydoll* 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
U got it right dont break them up , u can talk to her as a friend and when they do break ...... there u are ......in a nutshell... also just because he delivers pizzas dosent mean he is a piece of shi maybe he has some good qualities ...
2006-09-29 15:32:01 · answer #8 · answered by aaron 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Think here for a minute if she was willing to go out with you (having a bfriend at time) then she would do the same to you is that how you want to be played?
2006-09-29 15:32:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can only be a friend for her now. If you try to convince her to leave her boyfriend it will only cause problems in the future.
2006-09-29 15:30:48 · answer #10 · answered by thesweetestthings24 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋