I just met this guy and have started to really get attached to him and now he tells me he's got a job offer 7 hours away. He already works out of town for most of the week and I don't get to see him much and I don't want him to go. He hasn't decided what to do yet. He says he'd be home almost every weekend but that isn't enough for me. Am I being selfish for not wanting him to go?
2006-09-29 08:22:57 · 22 answers · asked by countrygirl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you are thinking more about yourself and what you want and not what would be best for him, then you are being selfish!
2006-09-29 08:27:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he took the offer, that would likely mean the end of your relationship, so in that sense, no, you're not being selfish. Only seeing eachother on the weekends is no way to keep a relationship fresh.
On the other hand, wanting him to consider your relationship before his financial options is a little selfish. But it's the kind of selfish you deserve to express so that he knows your relationship is important to you, and he can decide if he wants to persue his financial goals or his relationship goals with you, or find a way to make both work with the risks to both that come with that.
2006-09-29 15:29:28 · answer #2 · answered by Sean J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it could go either way I mean I couldn't really wait for a guy to get home late. But if you don't really see him a lot then maybe you should move on because their is platy of fish in the sea. But do I think your being selfish I don't think you are. One more thing just remember that if your not happy waiting for him or not seeing him their platy of fish in the sea for you. I hope everything works out.
2006-09-29 15:30:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wanting to see someone and spend time with them is not being selfish. On the other hand, you want him to be happy too, so I would say, if he really wants to do it, for now just try seeing him on weekends. It's better than not seeing him at all.
2006-09-29 15:27:38 · answer #4 · answered by beattyb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, not selfish at all, i would feel the same way, but the key is communication, you can have a long distance relationship and it can work, as long as theres communication, just talk it over and let him know how you feel about it and let him discuss his reasons and feelings about it without saying something like "well, how do you think i feel" he might not want a long distance realtionship because of the strain but thats the reason for the chat, i guarantee things will work out for the better whether youre together or not
2006-09-29 15:30:54 · answer #5 · answered by dads_lil_girl_90 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not being selfish, you're being human with very real emotions involved. but you can not build a relationship on weekends. And, it's not right to force him to choose. he has to do what is right for him and if you two were meant to be together, you will. Otherwise, let it go. I know it is hard but is you force him to choose and he may end up resenting you for it down the line.
2006-09-29 15:28:26 · answer #6 · answered by misfit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it's natural for u to feel that way because you want to spend time with him, but he also have to figure out what he wants to do. Just suck it up and let him go and wait until he gets back. This could be a test for the both of you to see if you're really serious about eachother.
2006-09-29 15:30:26 · answer #7 · answered by Ambi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not. Good for you for wanting him to be close. Now the trick is to tell him how you feel without sounding like it's you or the job. Somehow let him know you miss him a little already when you don't see him for a while.
2006-09-29 15:27:31 · answer #8 · answered by randyken 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes u are being a bit selfish but hell ur in love and dont want to let go.
2006-09-29 15:27:37 · answer #9 · answered by sunlight 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you still even tho you don't want him to aren't telling him he can't go. He probably thinks you are sweet but if you get pushy you will be being selfish he must go where the work is.
2006-09-29 15:33:06 · answer #10 · answered by sosueme534 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋