I have a guy friend that i have been seeing for three years but we are both working on ourselves. I am moving towards being in a relationship, but he is not. I am really into him and I know he cares for me. We are friends with benefits. But he tells me doesn't want to settle down until he can provide for a woman and take care of the two kids he already has. We are ending the sex part of our relationship but it is hard for me to just be his friend. He is faithful to me, but won't commit. What should I do?
2006-09-29 07:20:39 · 12 answers · asked by t j 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Women are their own worst enemies. It will not work. Watch the answers that you are about to get. If you allow yourself to be treated like you aren;t worth squat, you will always be treated like you are worth squat. Dump him and find a real man. Better yet, concentrate on making yourself the best that YOU can be, then look for a man. You'll probably find a better man along the way.
2006-09-29 07:24:26 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
they can and do work as long as both parties recognize that its only sex and thats all it ever will be. dont expect for him to make you his girlfriend. why would he make you his girl if hes getting what he wants already w/o the commitment? i think you should end everything because you are ultimately getting used whether you think so or not. he wont commit to you, he's not faithful because if he were he would commit and make it solid. i think the settling down until he can provide makes no sense at all to me. he's just not ready, be it with you or someone else. i think you should move on.
2006-09-29 15:02:39 · answer #2 · answered by MiaDiva28 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not expect him to change because of your feelings. If its too much for you to handle; you need to stop having sex with him. For the record friends with benefits CAN and DO work. I have been in these types of relationships for the past SEVEN ( thats right 7 years!!) years and have NEVER EVER gotten emotional about them. You have to know yourself and what you want in your life. A woman looking for a relationship should NOT get into such a relationship. I wish you well.
2006-09-29 14:24:57 · answer #3 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Friends with benefits it just that. If he says he dont want to settle down until he can provide for a woman and especially his two kids, thats exactly what he means and you need to respect that. Otherwise you are going to drive yourself crazy. If he is truly who you want to be with, then i suggest to back off abit and give him the time he needs since you did say hes faithful. Good luck.
2006-09-29 14:28:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats hard situation
because u have to look at it
u began the relationship as friends with benefits
and in many cases either on party grows feelings n the other doesnt
then u have the situation when both want a relationship
i am in the same situation, we both got out of hard relationships and r not ready to get into another on but i m confuse cuz i want to have a girl and she wants to have a man but we are not ready yet
yes we want to be in a relationship but r not ready
so i say let it be maybe he will change his mind
or maybe u will and will meet someone else
2006-09-29 14:25:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let me ask you this, if you are friends with benefits? who get's the benifet?
The guy. The guy gets the benefit because he does not to be in a relationship because he is an excuse-maker-uper, and does not want someone to settle down with. Friends with benefits are pointless. To be in a relationship, you are showing your true feelings for someone. You either love them or love to be with them. If you are friends with benefits, can you say I LOVE YOU to him? I think not.
Get a real relationship, and get a man that will hold your hand and mean it.
2006-09-29 14:25:30 · answer #6 · answered by Love is Patient, Love is Kind ♥ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know we are riding in the same boat...I had to move on, cause he was taking too long to commit....I can always have sex with the guy if i want to...
I've known my friend for 6 years and he tells me that he cares for me and will always be attracted to me....don't wait on his a$$, cause your going to be waiting for a while...
You'll are already ACTING like boyfriend and girlfriend...but he's not committing just in case he sees something that he wants to be with for the night...
EXPLORE OTHER OPTIONS....
2006-09-29 14:32:07 · answer #7 · answered by fatiegurl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you try and push him into a realtionship you will just lose the friendship.
If he was really interested you would already be together. Don't ruin what you have for a fantasy.
2006-09-29 14:30:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well hes not ready to commit and you are.
Commitment isnt for everybody
he is only with you and thats good, so enjoy yourself.
2006-09-29 14:27:12 · answer #9 · answered by creskin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should date other people. Still be friends with him, just see other people.
2006-09-29 14:23:47 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋