What do I do with my son??

Question

I love him to death, but I must admit that he is bad. He is 15 mos old and has the worst temper!! He gets so mad about everything and he kicks, screams, and bites. It is getting to the point where i don't want to take him anywhere because he throws fits when he doesn't get his way. It's usually just about walking, I say walk this way, he wants to go the other way, I say "no street" and he insists on walking into the street. I work full time, and I hate spending the only time I have with him telling him no and watching him throw these fits. How long will this last?? I don't know how long I can take it!!!!

Answer 1

Oh, honey...that's not bad behaviour..that's toddler behaviour. I know it's so hard to keep your patience with them at this age. It seems like you tell them no so much, they adopt no as their own favorite word. Don't allow him to hurt you. Look him in the eye and very adamantly tell him, "no hitting" (or kicking, or biting) when this behaviour occurs. Let him know he is hurting mommy, and that is not allowed. As for going his own way, my two and a half year old is still doing that, but it gets better with time--my four year old is very well behaved in public now. Get a little harness and leash if you want to let him wander safely, or just carry him in a backpack--he'll love the view! My last bit of advice is to check out www.askdrsears.com for some great ideas on positive discipline!

Answer 2

Who is the adult and who is the child. If he is doing this at 15 months, then what the hell will he be doing at 15. Did you know that in this day and age for a child to reach 15, depending on race, geographic, etc., the ripe old age of 15 is a blessing. Did you know that in many parts of the world children don't reach 15 months. So you admitting he is bad means you accept it? If he wants to throw a fit, and it doesn't embarrass you, let him, walk away and when he feels better or gets tired, which ever comes first, he will look for you. And then there is always that "grab" him up by the collar effect, it does work. God Bless.

Answer 3

For one thing, I don't think your son is BAD, at all. this seems like really normal behaviour. The trick, I think, (although not knowing you or your son, I don't really know), is to be consistent. Don't get into battles with him. Give him choices that work. Like, "you can walk holding my hand or by yourself". "We can skip or we can run". He doesn't get to choose to walk somewhere else. That's not an option. You will need to be firm, without losing your temper. It's just a fact. He can't do that. You don't even need to get upset. Just keep letting him know, calmly, that it's not an option. You might not get a lot done for a while. You'll just have to accept that. See if you can get someone else to help you with the millions of things you feel like you need to get done everyday (Two parents is never enough!)
The hardest part about parenting is not taking it personally. If you get into personal power struggles with him, he will win. Just know that you are the boss, because you need to be, not because you are better or smarter, just because you're the adult and it's your job to take care of him. Try not to get emotionally involved in a way that makes you upset. He's just doing HIS job, which is discovering what he can do, what the world is about and finding out where the boundaries are. The more he discovers that the boundaries are consistent and don't change but that they are there for a good reason, the more he will begin to accept them and feel safe. Try to stay calm. Just quietly insist. This does take time. Consistent and calm is the key. Sounds WAY easier to say than to do! lol And all of this is way easier to know in hindsight than in the moment. (I have an 18 year old and a 21 year old!)

And remember, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Millions of parents of toddlers have gone through the same thing. REad books, go out with other parents of toddlers for walks and errands and play dates. Join a parent and toddler group. It's almost essential for your sanity, which is the best gift you can give to your child: your health, sanity and happiness. You can't be a good parent if you're CRAZY!!!! lol

Good luck!!

Answer 4

Oh dear, your poor little boy. How many times do I read a negative in your question? Mmmmm Have you ever heard of positive reinforcement? I guess not. He is rebelling against your negativeness.
Example, I say walk this way . (how about saying Lets walk over here, this way is nicer)
Prime example in schools we say' Walk please' not 'Don't run'
It makes it a positive not a negative.
15 months old is also the stage when children start to gain independence and assert themselves (commonly called the terrible twos) Distraction and positive reinforcement are the way to deal with this behaviour, 'showing him who's boss' will only maintain this 'bad' behaviour.

Try gving him words of encouragement when he is doing things right and well behaved, and ignore the bad behaviour. (hard as it may seem, he is attention seeking and bad behaviour is a way to get your attention. If you show him plenty of attention, love and affection when he's good, he will soon catch on and stop the bad behaviour.

Good luck, I know its hard being a working parent, but just remember your little boy misses you when you're at work and just wants your attention!

Answer 5

Parenting is challenging! My daughter is 3 and a half and she still throws little tantrums. Tantrums are mainly caused because they're growing and learning about their emotions, but they don't know how to control them.
Just don't pay attention to the tantrums...ignore him when he acts that way (of course, don't ignore him walking into the street though). It's kind of their plea for attention to get their way.
I used to think that *for sure* it was a terrible 2's early. But they still persist. She's much better now than she used to be...but she still has her moments.
I also have a 1 year old son...he tries his tantrums on me too...but I just leave him where he is (mostly in our home) and walk away. He suddenly stops the tantrums and then just wants a hug.
You may also consider if your son is cosuming a lot of sugar (even hidden sugars). Those tend to spark tantrums as well.
Hope this has helped and good luck! =)

Answer 6

don't worry about his behavior,my 3 yrs old boy was like your son ,&may be much worse ,he didn't like to walk but by himself even in the street.& when i say no ,he kick his head on the ground .....and much worse,be patient with him,may be he want to feel that he can go wherever he want,take him to the park as mush as you can so he can walk by himself,&in the same time try to walk with him in the street so he can know the difference between the park & the street.this behavior wont change after that,it takes time,give your time to your son,he should feel bored ,& need some space to run & feel independent,after that ,your son will change 100% like my son.good luck.

Answer 7

I know it's emotionally hard but you have to stand your ground each and every time. Hang on to his hand when your walking....if he won't let you do that maybe carry him or put him in a stroller and tell him he can walk only if he holds your hand. The more you give in the longer this will last....

Answer 8

Sounds to me that he's getting a little spoiled by whoever is watching him during the day and he doesn't want to listen to you when you get home from work. You have to be firm with him and don't threaten time-outs, just give them to him. Stop telling him No and just punish him by time outs or taking something away from him. If you have a family member watching him during the day, make sure that they follow the rules. Example, if your mother in law watches your child, just tell your mother in law that when you are at work, she's the babysitter, not the grandmother. My father in law watches my daughter, sometime he forgets that he's there to watch her and parent her while i'm at work and he lets her get away with everything. I have to remind my daughter who the boss is whenever he leaves.

Answer 9

ok i'll give you three choices
(1) whoop his butt and show him who the boss is not the other way around.
(2) call super nanny
(3)send him to my house i bet ya he'll be an angel when you get him back best kid around the coast

don't let people tell you its a sage and other thing the way your kids act has a lot to do with how you give in and what you do about the problem your the mother not him

Answer 10

It's all a part of toddlerhood. Ignore the tantrums, they will go away eventually, as soon as he realizes that his behavior isn't getting any attention. You are the parent, you HAVE to be able to take it for as long as it goes on.