I do not know what to do.. I live in Los Angeles, the intercity schools are horrible.. She has the opportunity to attend and all girls private school or a charter school, but I am afraid she will rebale and hate me later in life. But I only want whats best for my daughter and I want to give her the best education possible. I love her so much.
2006-09-29 05:02:28 · 15 answers · asked by LuLu 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Do what you think is right. You're the mom.
Your daughter will get over it.
2006-09-29 05:04:48 · answer #1 · answered by DidacticRogue 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
This is long sorry.
Being a parent is the hardest job in the world but can also be the most rewarding and I wish you all the love and luck in the world.I have been thru this very same thing. May I speak from my experience? as far as the all girl private school, ...you can't force her to go; sure you can enroll her but unless you plan to go to every class and stand outside the classroom you cannot force her to go and even if you did that you cannot force her to learn. Now as far as an innercity school.You don't say what sort of kid she is, what kind of student SHE is or even her age. Does she like school? Is she doing well already? An upset could really mess things up along educational lines if she has been doing well so far.. Are there any behavioral problems going on already? what sort of friendships does she have? (if we don't know who our kids' friends are right there we have a big problem, we have to make it our business)Is she motivated to do well ? if so then she will do well anywhere, innercity or private,with boys or without and remember you are her parent she has alot of you in her and you are part of her educational process in the way she reacts and interacts with school and education. Our kids education is also in our hands, don't abandon or leave it all to the teachers, stay on top of things,have a set homework time; go to ALL parents nights; no excuses, be forward thinking look at the school year schedule sheets and get your schedule in order so you can accomodate these nights.(or days) And don't just meet the teachers, TALK with them, other faculty and other parents and keep an alliance with her teachers (or counselor if HS) so if something starts to slide you are alerted to it before it gets too far
( things like lower grades, missing homework, unexplained abscences).ALSO talk to your daughter about what is happening at school and LISTEN if need be make an appointment and go see what the school has to say about what you see and hear from your kid, too bad if the school doesn't like it. she's your kid and your doing the right thing. The child's attitude toward learning is important, she will emulate what she hears ands sees; be respectful towards education, never cut down the teachers or show disredpect in front of the kid NO MATTER what, ( i took a few teachers to task over the years in a respectful manner, and if I didn't it was because I was not given the respect BACK from the teacher (some are real losers) but NOT in front of the kid, you will be doing your child no favor, if you are respectful and learning minded she will be as well. my kids and lots of other kids have gone to innercity schools and have some out just great. Just chill and remember you will live thru this and so will she if you STAY a parent NOT a dictator nor should you try to be her "friend". but always BE THERE with unconditional love no matter what. we all fall down sometimes, always let her know your arms are there to hold her if she needs. good luck
2006-09-29 05:25:10 · answer #2 · answered by micheleseptember 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Will being in an all girls school really protect her? I put my children in school close to my house. They made friends close by and spent more time with the friends here at home where I could keep an eye on them.
If put in an all girl school, they might make friends from places far across the city and want to go there all the time. It's hard to know what they are getting up to.
My sister put her daughter in an all girls private catholic school up to grade 9. She rebelled at age 13, had drinking problems, substance abuse, and smoked. This was through friends she met at the private school.
I'm not saying this will happen to your daughter but I'm saying that it can happen anywhere.
My two children are grown up (23 & 25). My son works, has never smoked or done drugs and doesn't drink. But.....he likes extreme sports...he BMX's off cliffs into lakes...skateboards off all types of things, snowboards doing flips and crazy stunts, and likes fast cars!
My daughter goes to university full time plus works at an insurance agency 30hrs a week and lives independantly with her boyfriend. She is in the process of trying to quit smoking.
We can't win them all.
Sit down with your daughter and talk with her about why she doesnt want to change schools and try and figure out what can work for both of you to keep happy.
P.S.: When I was in high school my parents tried to put me in a private school catholic school. I ran away from home after one month. When I was brought back I waited until my 18th birthday and left home.
Please talk it through with your child, it's the best way to go.
2006-09-29 05:14:20 · answer #3 · answered by steelydawn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to her that she's going to an all girl school, but that she can still have a normal teenage girl life. You seem to be doing something in best interest for her education and that's important. I see her being mad about not being around boys or having that interaction or that if there is a uniform she will be unhappy. Have her go with you to find out the pros of these schools and tell her to read this post. I'm sure seeing it will help her understand your concerns. Good luck to both of you.
2006-09-29 06:13:59 · answer #4 · answered by 4eyed zombie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-25 02:29:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably doesn't want to leave her friends, boys or change anything about her world. If you really think that this is the best thing for you daughter take her somewhere (like starbucks, lol) and you guys can talk about. She can see your point of view and you can see hers. Afterwards work out a compromise. If she's still being unreasonable tell her to try it for say a year or she's grounded. (but if you do that she will NOT be happy)
2006-09-29 05:11:43 · answer #6 · answered by supergirl67 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old is she, 16+ it's best to let her decide it is so easy for her to sabatage her grades. etc if forced to go where she does not want to be. Also the risk of her dropping out may be greater. By the Junior/Senior year she needs to make her own educational decisions. Under 16 perhaps you can visit these schools with her and see what she thinks then.
2006-09-29 07:26:48 · answer #7 · answered by badmikey4 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old is your daughter? Have you visited the school? Do they have a boys school that they get together with?
Are there any coed schools in the area that are private.
Try making a deal..."Go for 1 year if you hate it we'll take you out and try a coed school."
2006-09-29 05:05:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dont force her to go to a school she doesnt want to go to. My sister went to an all girls catholic school in Glendora, and she liked it. They require students to maintain their grades. However, most of the girls there, turned into party animals and would sneak to meet guys. Girls always want what they cant have, so be careful of that. I went to a public school, and recieved a good education too. Its all in the matter of how you work with her when she gets home... make sure she understands what she learned, and help with homework.
2006-09-29 05:05:56 · answer #9 · answered by julez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My parents forced me to go to an all girls Catholic high school. I obviously did not want to go at first, but it was so much fun! We didn't have to care how we looked or acted because no boys were around. However, there was an all boys school that was five minutes away from us, so we did have "mixers." It was the best choice my parents made for me!
2006-09-29 05:07:09 · answer #10 · answered by Meg 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If that's the school that will be best for her, you have to do what is in your daughter's best interests. Teenagers are always going to be angsty and dissatisfied (weren't we the same way at that age?) but later in life she'll appreciate that you had her best interests at heart.
2006-09-29 05:05:22 · answer #11 · answered by Lanani 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋