I think that after the week end I am going to have to give by g/f an ultimatum, Either spend more time with me or lose me.
Any other suggestions. I dont want much just her and not even all the time I can cope with 50/50. but not 2 evenings a week it just does my head in.
2006-09-29 04:07:33 · 22 answers · asked by Fox Hunter 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Ok so I get the ultimatum is bad. But how do you ask for something with out it sounding like begging.
Maybe I should just walk away giving no reason that would really confuse her!!
2006-09-29 04:23:58 · update #1
You're right. If you need more and she won't give it, what else can you do?
2006-09-29 04:10:15 · answer #1 · answered by wayouthere 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ther is no point giving an ultimatum ... You r probably bluffing anyway. U sound like u like her too much.
I suggest u get a life .. and start going out with friends more ... u'll be amazed how much more she wants to see of u, and respects you if u stop pestering her and start living ur own life.
... Or she may just be glad to get rid of you.
whatever you do .. I dont think an ultimatum is the best way to go about it.
You would have got more sympathy if u were a girl asking this question ....( just not from me tho')
... and u don't give enuff information about why its 2 nights a week anyway.
Dr Bad
(see u in the singles clubs ...soon)
2006-09-29 11:31:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right to want to spend more time with her, and if she cannot give you more time then you have every right to break it off with her. I dont suggest giving her an ultimatum though. Ultimatums usually put relationships on the hostile level, and you definitely dont want that. In war, she will win--trust me. Instead, try explaining to her that you really need more from the relationship (and make it clear to her that you need more of an emotional connection, not sex). Ask her if you can work out other times to see each other during the week. Does she work?--you can visit her at work. Can you meet each other for lunch breaks? Can you go shopping/run errands together? Think of ways that the two of you can spend more time together without making a drain on the rest of her life. Good luck!
2006-09-29 11:13:06 · answer #3 · answered by AKA 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would just have a talk with her and explain how you feel about her and only how you feel is why you want to be a bigger part of her life, more than a couple times a week. I would hold off on the ultimatum, give it some time first, you never know after the talk and she realizes how much you want her to be with you, it might be, thats all it took! Good luck, and take care!
2006-09-29 11:11:57 · answer #4 · answered by me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her how you feel! Women value genuine honesty from a guy! She is probably scared of smothering you as most men like to take things very slowly.
If you have a heart to heart and things don't improve then move on. Don't give her an ultimatum as I know what I'd say and that's get lost!
2006-09-29 11:14:38 · answer #5 · answered by DippyGirl78 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships are all about comprimise hun - it seems you've been patient in waiting for everything to work around and suit her - so I think you're totally within your right to give her an ultinatum.
If she loves you the way she should then she will realise that shes neglecting you and make more of an effort to see you - if shes doesnt - she wont and you know then you've made the right decision.
It sounds to me like she uses you when it suits her or when shes at a loose end and you deserve better than that! I hope things go ok for you xx
2006-09-29 11:15:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Never give and ultimatum it never works out in the end. Sit down with her and tell her you need more time with her. She will either listen to you or not and you will know if you should break up with her or not.
2006-09-29 11:12:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk about how you feel, giving an ultimatum will likely end in you losing her. Do you really want this?
Some people need their own space, though communication is a MUST
2006-09-29 11:11:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you are going to lose her man. Never give a woman an ultimatum. Make suggstions if you like but never an ultimatum.
2006-09-29 11:11:28 · answer #9 · answered by edwards889@btinternet.com 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simple no ultimatums just ask her and if she won't (not can't but won't) then tell her you must move on. If she can't cause of schedule or whatnot then you are in the wrong.
2006-09-29 11:17:26 · answer #10 · answered by omvg1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you live together? what are your work schedules? do you have an exlusive relationship? there are a number of things I could ask before I really answer your questions. Have you spoken with her before about spending more time together? If you really care for her, try to work it out. Why does being apart "mess with your head?" don't you trust her?
lol - see what I mean about the questions?
2006-09-29 11:11:57 · answer #11 · answered by sassybree1979 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋