How do I develop genuine confidence and high self-esteem?

Question

You know,the kind of self-belief that tells me"I CAN DO ANYTHING I PUT MY MIND TO!!!!!"AND THEN MAKES IT COME TRUE!

Answer 1

KIck boxing!

Answer 2

I know this will sound cheesy as anything, but it actually works...

Lack of self confidence tends to stem from, or lead to, unhappiness and a warped view of your good qualities and what you're capable of.

So to begin with sit down and think about what makes you unhappy, or what aspects of you life you wish you could change. Is there anything you wish to achieve but don't think you have what it takes? Do you feel like you're stuck in a rut of any kind, and don't know how to move on? Any qualities or habits you wish you didn't have?

Once you've figured out what's holding you back, start breaking it down. When all your insecurities and everythink that brings you down are lumped together, hovering above your head like a black cloud it's no wonder you feel powerless.
When you see all the components individually, you should realise that you can deal with it. One issue at a time.

Unhappy with your job? Write a new CV, apply for other jobs, ask your boss for a promotion...
Want to quit smoking or join a gym or eat less Maltesers? Dedicate yourself to cutting down, or decide on an evening when you can do some workouts.

When you do this, even if you regain control over only the smallest thing, you will start to feel different.

Stay focused, write a reminder for yourself about all the things you want to achieve.

Set yourself deadlines, i.e. by Christmas I'm a non smoker, by next month I will have a tidy house, by next summer I'll run a marathon, and keep all of that in mind, even better if you have visual reminders.

And also, it helps if you write yourself a list of all your good qualities. You are your own person, you deserve only the best. No one has the right to take you for granted or take the piss.

If you believe in yourself others will too. With every small personal victory you're one step closer to being in total control of every aspect of your life, and with that your self esteem will rocket.

(Sorry about writing an essay here, but I know exactly where you're coming from.. Two years ago I was in a very different place, but by doing everything listed above I managed to turn my life around, and now I'm happier than I've ever been.)

Good luck!!

Answer 3

For a start, focus on all your positives and find ways to reduce your negatives. Be proud of the things you do well and if there is something you can change about yourself to make you better, look at pursuing those goals in a practical, timely manner and celebrate when you accomplish that goal. For example, I was always told by my parents that I could do anything I put my mind to and I have. I put myself through college. Another example is that I want to lose weight to be a healthier me, not to compare myself to women in magazines. When I accomplish that goal, I plan on buying a really cute outfit and showing off my new figure to my family and being proud of how I look. I am already happy with the way I look now but worry about my health. However, I do focus on the fact that I am a great mom, intelligent, and have many positive physical attributes such as pretty eyes and great hair as I have been told that by many people. Good luck!

Answer 4

You should look in the mirror and pretend to yourself that you really like who you are. When you get reasonably good at faking it in the mirror, start doing the same thing around people. But you should start with people who are very shy and gradually work your way up to people who are confident. Imitate the confident ones. Try to be like them. Think a lot about how good you are. Talk about how great you are. Pounce on anyone who is not confident to build up your own assurance. Start bragging about what you have done, progress to bragging about what you do now, will do soon and finally, what you could do if you really wanted to. Associate exclusively with people you've really impressed. Wear designer underwear, get expensive haircuts and buy a Rolex knockoff. Pick the most egocentric group you can find to identify with (probably neo-cons). Practice sneering when anyone expresses an opinion with which you disagree. Slap women, children, puppies and kittens around. Let everyone that's not as confident as you feel your power. You get the idea. Good luck!

Answer 5

My self-confidence didn't truly materialise until I had my daughter. Then I started doing art and that further boosted my confidence, especially when I discovered I had a natural aptitude for it. I'm doing an art degree which is challenging, but I feel like I've stepped up a notch on the ladder. I'm pretty much up for anything now, and confident I can succeed. I am the Tiger. Grrr!

Find yourself a hobby or vocation that you love. It'll sort you right out!

Answer 6

Firstly keep telling yourself that - when that internal voice of yours keeps telling you differently turn the volume down and make it go away.

Imagine someone who might feel that way like Beckham or someone else successful and famous - imagine them standing in front of you see how they stand and look, imagine what they are feeling, then take a step forward and step into that person and feel what they feel, think what they think and stand how they stand.

The body can not tell the difference between faking it and it being real - if you pretend to feel sad you will feel sad if you pretend to feel happy you will feel happy whilst you pretend to do so.

Same works for confidence - if you do it enough - i.e. every morning before you leave the house - eventually the body will learn to get into that mode by itself and you can do anything you want to do !

Try it, you will be surprised!

www.anderson-therapy.com

Answer 7

To a cynic like me, confidence only comes through practice and trial.
Set yourself a challenge, doesn't really matter what it is, provided it's something that requires effort, is challenging, and is something you want to achieve.
Give it a try and see how you get on. If you fail, look at how / why and try again.
The more effort you put in, the more rewarding the achievment.

Determination is the key to success.

(Christ, I'm philosophical for a Friday!!)

Answer 8

START Believing in YOU.... Start positive speaking for 21 days and believe me you will be changed to MIRACLES.

I was the same before some time.. and one of my frens introduced me to "Britt System" for amway corporation... I have developed a lot of confidence and Self esteem....

Remember "The best way of getting rid of fear is DO THAT THING"

Answer 9

Do something worthwile with your life. Do something that matters. Help people, even when they don't deserve it. Look for opportunities to make the world better. Donate your time to the hungry, abused, widowed, or orphaned. Get involved with a church. Read to kids.

Honestly, if you want to feel good about yourself, make a reason to feel good about yourself. If you want to feel like you can do anything you want, set a goal and meet it. It doesn't do anyone any good for you to just feel warm and fuzzy about yourself. Share your talents with the world.

Answer 10

confidence is built in u when u start achieving wht u desire. just take part in small functions or anything which u like always play a active role in ur life. be alert n do everything what u like u will soon be appreciated by ur fnds n family. just be active every moment n u will be noticed by others. this will boost ur self-esteem n confidence. keep trying u can do everything.

Answer 11

Put more effort into everything until you can see the results. You can tell yourself these things repeatedly and believe you believe in them, but it's not going to really work until you KNOW they are true and true for you (not just other people). Caio!