He doesn't work. He buys & sells car (actually i pay for car & parts, he fix 'em), the last time he made a sale was 4-5 mos ago & he does give me the proceeds. But for the time he does not make any, I pay for all bills. He actually owes me & not break even. He doesn't work consecutively, for ex., he had a car to fix & still not ready for 4 mos. He's always hanging out w/ his friends & comes in & out whenever he wants. He leaves the house all day & doesn't come home til late or whenever he wants or is just always in & out. It stresses me out. I'm 6 1/2 pregnant & had asked several times to get a job, but he hasn't. Doesn't really do much support in our living expenses, I do. I think deep inside I know he has a good heart, but he puts me through so much s*t and I'm tired of it. I'm ready to move on. I know $ you can always make, but is this guy worth my time? Been together for 3 1/2 yrs, but I'm unhappy and depressed.I'm carrying his baby,but I wonder,can I make it alone?do I need him?
2006-09-28 19:12:17 · 12 answers · asked by alloutoflove 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
oh now you need to do something for you, leave. You'll be better off on your own you already know you can support yourself and one other person. Why should you support him and the baby. You got the practice now put it to use for you and your baby. Maybe he'll grow up later maybe he won't. Hopefully by then you'll be over him and just say best of luck to him. Take care of yourself/
2006-09-28 19:22:07 · answer #1 · answered by leviathia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It must be hormones that made you ask this question. Seriously you need to READ what you wrote and the answer is plain as day. If you are supporting him financially, he's not motivated and you are unhappy, LEAVE HIM. I can't believe you are having a child with someone so pathetic. Nice and a good heart does NOT pay the bills, put food on the table or means he will be a good father. Please do not listen to the get counseling advice. You didn't say if you were married ( I take it you are just dating) 3 1/2 years is PLENTY of time to know this is NOT working out, and frankly he has gotten away with this behavior, he will never change. People always tell you who they are if you just listen, he has told you he's a lazy good for nothing that wants a mommy and someone to take care of his sorry no working ***. LEAVE HIM, you will be better off WITHOUT HIM. He has nothing to offer you as you well know.
Good luck and god bless......
2006-09-28 19:32:16 · answer #2 · answered by Tara B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're a woman who has a lot on her mind right now.Stay focused and don't get overwhelmed. You are getting ready to become a mother, and that means your first priority should be to take care of yourself so you can provide for your child. You said you were tired of this lifestyle, and you were unhappy and ready to move on, and I believe you. I think you just needed to write it and hear yourself say it. Well, you've said it so it's time to put your plan into action. Move out and get away from this man who is not good or healthy for you. I'm not saying that you do not love him, but not all loves are meant to last a lifetime. I think you have been with this love long enough, now it's time to move on and take care of yourself and your child. You are a strong woman, because you realize that you need to make some changes to better your life. Gather up your self-respect, and strength and find yourself a job that can support yourself and your child. If you have to find daycare when the time comes, do it. Many many women support their children on their own, it is amazing what you can do when you have to. Be strong, assertive and take care of you and your baby.
2006-09-28 19:23:02 · answer #3 · answered by Cynthia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie dump him how loud does he have to say he does not want to be with you. A real man would go out and get a job especially knowing he is about to be a dad. It sounds like you are mother and son. You can make it as a single parent better than staying with someone who does nothing for you. If he really had a good heart he would be showing it not living off of you and causing extra stress on a pregnant women.
2006-09-28 19:16:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know the answer to this.
When the baby comes, that will make two children that you have. He's giving you what he's willing to give already, and disregarding his responsibility to you. You need to accept that.
You need counseling at your local mental health center from an objective professional. A counselor can help you make the decision you know you need to make and help you form a plan to move on. It will take some time, and you will need a support system, including a counselor, to help you.
Someday you will find a man who'll be a truly responsible partner to you. No, you do not need him. Make yourself a plan of action and follow through with it.
Remember, he can only take advantage of you if you continue to let him.
2006-09-28 19:48:17 · answer #5 · answered by KIT J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dear, even if he is good man so wat? U n yr baby still need to eat... He has a pair of hands he should work nt oni for himslf but aso for this family...i can oni say he is nt responible loa... he knew tat u r gng to gv birth soon but yet he is nt doing anything! Aft yr birth u hv to "feed" yrslf n the child n aso him, can u manage? Perhaps u should talk to him again n let him noe how u feel abt it n if he still doesnt do anything abt it, i suggest u should leave him la. No point hanging w such man, wasting yr time n aso yr $. Ture the child need a dad but i m sure yr child will agree w wat u do... "feed" a child is already nt easy some more hv to feed a "useless" man might as well use tat $ to do something better for yr child, right? I hope things will b fine for both of u it kind of sad to hear yr story.....may god b w u all the time n help u wake this stuipd man up or at least gv u the strenght to leave him, take care
2006-09-28 19:28:11 · answer #6 · answered by D@ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get rid of anything that makes u unhappy.
reason for leaving:
1. cannot support a family
2. stays late all night out. he is a married man, come on
3. lazy and depends so much on you.
he is leaving like he is still a single man. what is that? man with no sense of responsibilities will eventually leave u anyways.. so leave him when u r ready!
2006-09-28 19:23:43 · answer #7 · answered by The Punisher 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what would you need him for if your paying all the bills while he hangs with his friends. you are making it alone he;s no help. don't support no man , he is capable of working but why should he he can come and go as he pleases and you give him money, you would have more money if he was gone he won;t be there spending it.and you would be happier ,find a real man not one thats gonna use you.
2006-09-28 19:24:43 · answer #8 · answered by smurfette_ftwayne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Matey i will chat from my coronary heart. i'm 6Ft 2", distinctly in superb condition 14 stone, dark and nonetheless sense your discomfort. So tall adult males do not needed look down on short adult males yet any short guy who tries to be all mouthy he gets a fist!! I.e. it is not shortness it extremely is character. additionally suited protection tension boys who're the toughest of the hard at the instant are not any way taller than you, i could not be a stable paratrooper or SAS whether I handed the attempt as too tall. same for a secret agent. Are those not suited adult males? What i might say, particular positioned slightly greater weight on, get down the gymnasium, not for the appearance yet for the self thought and self belief. additionally do not take existence or women human beings heavily. a woman will love you at present and run off with the milkman day after today not something you're able to do approximately it. it fairly is existence settle for it. notwithstanding it is likewise existence that a woman won't unavoidably prefer to bypass with a dismal, uninteresting guy and could bypass with the milkman in case you nonetheless have those ideals! calm down guy your flat lineing!! As for opportunities ignored, those are on condition which you probably did not act on them? I.e. all of us omit opportunities yesturday it extremely isn't any be counted in case you omit them at present or day after today that counts. All i might say, whilst bypass out only confer with a woman considering you like to and don't think of of the competition, you basically prefer to speak to a girl so which you will in spite of everybody else. she will have the means to return back to you if she desires to, use the numbers game, & the means of your words and movements not the form you look. whats up check out me, i'm older nonetheless have not have been given anybody different than a lifeless soul and a bottle of vodka so won't be in a position to be too undesirable.
2016-10-01 11:57:30 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he was really good to you, he wouldn't be causing you to be so stressed out, so depressed or to be considering moving on.
You can do what you set your mind to do... you don't need the misery that you're going thru.
2006-09-28 19:28:14 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋