We're high school sweethearts.(+now in college) Been dating 4 years and got engaged over the summer . The ring is breathtaking and wayy too expensive! We finish each others sentences and always know what the other is thinking. We have the same morals and values. I often take it all for granted. My only complaint is the lack of harmony with his parents. However in the first year of our relationship i began hanging out with another guy as friends. I ended up getting really confused. I realized that if i let myself continue in that pattern I would have lost something really great and special with guy #1. I told him we couldn't hang out anymore. It was really tough because I liked him a lot and got along great with his family which was nice since I don't have parental figures. It ended abruptly and awkwardly. I often regret having let that happen. Ever since then, despite my love for my fiance i've been unable to forget this guy. Why can't I just forget him and go on with life?
2006-09-28 15:53:06 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Baby girl, this happened many times before you had to encounter it. This happened to me and most of my other friends (including the male ones) before we all got married. The answer? It's the "What if's...?" Like what if he was my boyfriend/fiance, what would my life be? How would it feel? Would I be happier? And let me tell you now that if you risk your current relationship to find out the answer to your "what ifs", you might end up having more regrets than if you just forget about this "other guy". Don't worry too much about the parents of guy#1 darling, you are not marrying them, you are marrying HIM. You are just curious to try life with this new man. But if things really don't work out with your fiance, then that is the time to find someone else to replace him. Be happy and content with your fiance right now, 4 years of relationship don't come easy. You might loose this great guy for someone totally not worth it.
2006-09-28 16:10:33 · answer #1 · answered by jeni_love_12 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tough call. If you have serious doubts then maybe the marriage needs to be put off. But of course, sometimes that conversation lead to no marriage ever! You need to seriously sort out your feelings. Do some hardcore thinking.
BUT I'm curious, why is the parent things such an issue? You and your man have your life, even if you don't like his parents it's not like you live with his family or anything? It would be regrettable but not a real factor for me. Or is he letting his parents interfere too much? If so maybe you should let him know how you feel and he might take care of things. It just seems like that is a very strange thing to be concerned over, lots of inlaws and spouses don't get along. That's why they are called inlaws!
2006-09-28 22:58:29 · answer #2 · answered by s_e_e 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you love your man but you only love things about him and your guy #2 is the one who did for you what your man wasent then it could be that you arent ready for marrige and you need more time you should stay with your man unless you just cant get past this guy then I would say maybe you should be alone but remember just because you have love for someone doesent mean you have to go and be with them people cant help how they feel and you just need to talk with your man and get an understanding and call that man you let go if it wasnt sexual then let the man be your friend
2006-09-29 00:46:45 · answer #3 · answered by BIGDIGGA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me that your in a stable place right now with guy #1 . Many mistakes are made by thinking the grass is greener elsewhere. RARELY , is that the case . Good Luck 2 you!
2006-09-28 22:57:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Guy #1 needs to grow up and not tell you who your friends can be!
2006-09-28 23:53:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
life is not a movie
you are not marrying the wrong man
you have cold feet, get some socks and get over it
2006-09-28 22:55:48 · answer #6 · answered by tigweldkat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u were probably just having cold feet...u seem to ahve a great thing going on with guy #1...don't lose him
2006-09-28 23:00:59 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
life isnt a movie .till you see this you arent ready for marrage in my opion grow up . ?
2006-09-28 23:01:43 · answer #8 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋