I want to make sure, since I am legally inept, that I am not getting myself into something I should have a lawyer for. We already share time with our child but will this stop me from moving out of state if I need to? Grant him anything specific?
2006-09-28 15:20:56 · 18 answers · asked by daisy 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't chastise me for my decisions. I am a good mother that has done what is right for my child emotionally and physically. If you don't have anything nice and helpful to say then don't bother...
2006-09-28 15:27:36 · update #1
To try to make it more clear...I said 'if I had to move out of state' "had to" being the word, due to finances or better job offer,etc. Maybe people on here expect the worst, but I'm not, I just don't want to be too naive.
2006-09-28 15:43:09 · update #2
Before I begin, I want to make it clear that I am not chastising you for your decision. It's your life and it will be what you make it of it...we aren't the ones who have to live with the consequences. Now then, when it comes to birth certificates and parental rights. They are NOT one in the same. Reason being, is that you could put anyone's name you wanted on that birth certificate. Because of the high number of cases like this, paternity test are automatically ordered when a child is born out of wedlock and the custodial parent wants financial support. Or say a possible father comes forward and claims that is his child...a paternity test would be ordered too. If you knowingly deceived the court, the father, or any state office in regards to paternity, and the father wishes, the father could obtain custody of that child.
What I am trying to say is that it's best to put the real father's name on the birth certificate. It'll save you a big headache down the road if you decide to change your mind. This way, child support can also be ordered and if this man wants visitation, take it in stride knowing that he cares enough to have a relationship with his child. Does that mean you will never be able to move out of state? Not necessarily. Every situation is different. Some parents, in your same circumstances have made rather flexible arrangements when it comes to visitation and travel expenses. BUT in order to do that, they somehow manage to maintain a civil relationship for the sake of the child. If you think the father is capable of that, then give it a shot. If not, omit the name, but then don't think you can come back years later and make demands. As of January 2006, the courts no longer work that way.
I hope this clears things up for you.
2006-09-28 15:46:12 · answer #1 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, here is the deal. If you do not put his name and some day you meet "the one" and he wants to adopt, you will have to find the biological dad, get a DNA test to prove he is the biological dad and then get his permission to allow the other guy to adopt. It used to be that you did not have to do all that but some dude found out he had a child that he did not know about and the mom was sued and it was just ugly. The other side of that coin is that if you ever need help like state help or support you will need the dads name on the document and again you may have to prove he is the dad based on a DNA test at your own expense. Then the last thing you need to know or ask yourself is this, how is that child going to feel when he/she hits puberty and feels the loss of his real father in his life. Sometimes step dads treat other Men's children different than they would their own. Hope that this information helps you make a choice. The only way that his name on the document should hinder you is if he actually wants to spend time with his kid. He will have to prove that the move is not in the best interest of the child. If you have sole custody you will not need his permission. If you have joint custody you will.
2006-09-28 23:58:43 · answer #2 · answered by Lynnette G 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hi , I know from my experience and i live in Ohio i don't know if laws are different where you live .But i have the father listed on the birth certificate and i am the soul custodial parent it was set up that way through child support . even if i wouldn't of had his name on it it automatically got put on there when you go for support i can take them out of state do whatever Like a policeman once told me when i was worried he was going to come do something i called the police and i asked the officer at that time if he could get me for kidnapping ( i was going to go to Vegas to see my friend for a while ) he said there's nothing wrong with taking a vacation and that mothers are the main parent in most cases so there wouldn't be a problem unless i was gone for a long time and he took it back to court to get more visitation. even then you would still be in no trouble unless you have it set up know that you cant take them out of state . But i guess if you dont put him on there or go for support and he doesn't do anything then there is nothing he could do
2006-09-28 23:11:04 · answer #3 · answered by llride2001 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't matter whether his name is on the birth certificate or not. He's the father. If he wants rights to his child he will get them. All he would have to do is get a paternity test to prove he's the father, if you're unwilling to confirm if he is or not. His name being put on the birth certificate by you is really irrelevant if he wants rights. I guess the big picture is why is this even an issue? He has a legal and moral right to be involved in his childs life, unless he would abuse the child in some way.
2006-09-28 22:54:27 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know what state you live in, but usually you can't move out of state with the child unless the other parent agrees. A father has rights to the child. Call a lawyer some lawyers offer free advice. Good luck.
2006-09-28 22:27:35 · answer #5 · answered by BadAssGirlINWV 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand your defensiveness, but I can also see how people are interpreting your statement. By asking if you are free to leave the state, there's an inescapable implication that you want to try to, well, escape him. I'm sorry if that's not your intent, but it's not easy to read your question otherwise. Either way, looking at the legal code of your state is probably your best bet short of contacting an attorney. Try entering "(name of state) law" into Google, then use the state law page's own search engine, enter "father + or AND "birth certificate." That should help. Also, people are protective of his rights since you've not given any indication that he has not behaved in a way underserving of them.
2006-09-28 22:36:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here in Australia, even if you have lodged "father unknown" on the birth certifacte, verbally acknowledging a partner or male as the father of your child in the presence of a legal professional gives them SOME legal rights.
2006-09-28 22:28:21 · answer #7 · answered by tui 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Immediate legal rights, yes. If you were to not name the father, which obviously some dont do...then if he feels it's his child, he would have to file a paternity blood test and you would have to comply. If he proves the father then he could pursue legal and custodial rights and also pay you child support or vice verse.
2006-09-28 22:26:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it don't matter if his name is there or not,, if he is the father he has all the rights in this country has to offer,, he can pick up the child anytime anywhere,, i was a cop once and alot was brought to my attention regarding the father stole the child,, nope,, we could not touch him,, you have to get a court order saying you have full custody of the child before he does,, and yes courts do sometimes deny the gardian not to move to far away from the father,, get to court first,,
2006-09-28 22:25:54 · answer #9 · answered by quitelovableman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do this it is a bad idea you will get in serious trouble not only with state custody but also with the files its in.
2006-09-28 22:39:12 · answer #10 · answered by kamiya r 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋