fill in the blank: and you can't hear anything but the ________ of your own thoughts.
thanks if you help me. it's really a simple thing to answer, just one word i can't come up with.
2006-09-28 15:04:30 · 29 answers · asked by lostinabook24 3 in Education & Reference ➔ Homework Help
this poem is about a dream i had about a forgotten park. and the bit i'm trying to fill in is:but when you come back to reality,
you’re simply standing in front of,
staring at
the park that time forgot
with its grass overgrown with weeds
and its swing sets rusting and creaking
and its slides stained from the wear-and-tear of nature
and you can’t hear anything but the rustle of the leaves on the trees
and the _____ of your own thoughts
i like roar and echo, but maybe something else would work better
2006-09-28 15:11:44 · update #1
and this poem is just in the rough draft stage at the moment, i'm working on it.
2006-09-28 15:16:01 · update #2
Echo make the poem feel much better
2006-09-28 15:13:58 · answer #1 · answered by S A 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I like the one suggestion "streams," because it's the one that most "makes a sound."
However, streams in your head do not, so I'd suggest adding another word in front of it to let the reader know that you are aware you're not actually hearing a stream, but using a metaphor. "Melancholy" is the perfect word for this, and the perfect word to tie up the sentiment of the entire poem. So insert "melancholy streams" in your blank, and see what you think.
Also, your last four lines all start with "and." It looks a bit amateurish. May I suggest a semi-colon at the end of the third line from the bottom, and removing "and" from each of your two last lines. Unless you meant to purposefully use and repetitively to drive home a point, in which case, it's fine as is.
Let us know what you choose, and nice job on the rest of the poem. It really conveys a message clearly.
2006-09-28 22:23:39 · answer #2 · answered by swissdx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could use something simple and say "the sound of your own thoughts" or use another word like pulse or whisper.
2006-09-28 22:07:48 · answer #3 · answered by Rei-chan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
bustle. goes well with rustle. sort of like alliteration. makes thoughts and leaves kind of similar. poem needs editing.
2006-09-28 22:15:11 · answer #4 · answered by sonyack 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
torrent, turmoil, madness, voice, foolishness, insanity,
what is the poem about, need more info to put in that perfect word so that it flows like a stream
2006-09-28 22:11:17 · answer #5 · answered by Eloy B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stirring.
"rustle of leaves on the trees"
and "stirring of your own thoughts"
I think that says it all about your good poem.
2006-09-28 22:45:07 · answer #6 · answered by bhupen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dependes on what you are trying to convey, Two that spring to mind are "Silence" or "Roar"
2006-09-28 22:07:15 · answer #7 · answered by knujefp 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"the voice of your own thoughts" or "the sound of your own thoughts"
Either would sound great! Good luck!
2006-09-28 22:08:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
and yo can't hera anything but the words of your own thoughts.
2006-09-28 22:07:35 · answer #9 · answered by Brianda 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'll give you a couple of words that will fit:
sound
hum
beat
pulse
2006-09-28 22:06:16 · answer #10 · answered by Nikki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋