10 y.o. asks if she can cut and cook French fries. I say yes if you do your homework and follow instruction. We're prepping the fries. She has a 22 yr old brother that I TAUGHT how to fry an egg b/c he didn't know how since he had never cooked before (these are all immigrant step children of my husband). I say "This is how I do it. Please get the skillet" She says things like"NO! I don't want that pan. That's not how my brother does it!" (Never mind that he has NEVER prepared french fries.) You:“If you want perhaps your brother will buy the ingredients as I have and cook this with you. This is canceled” She looks at U like U are a cruel sadist. Was I fair to an ungrateful, spoiled brat or was I an ogre to a normal 11 yr old?
2006-09-28 13:56:09 · 10 answers · asked by Kaitlyn 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
You are in charge. The kids vote does not count when it comes to using a stove an hot oil. You did right as far as I am concerned.
Sounds like she needed to be taken down a notch or two.
2006-09-28 14:10:25 · answer #1 · answered by dudeman 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a 10 yr old daughter and I can tell you that they are all like that. I probably hear "I hate you!" or "You are sooo mean" about 10 times a day. The plain and simple truth is, she doesn't hate me and we both know it. When my daughter begins to throw a fit about how she hates me or how I am unfair to her I always tell her that if she didn't hate me I wouldnt be doing my job. Kids need boundries and you did the right thing by setting some. The only thing that I would have done differently would be to say something like "If you want to help ME cook the fries, you will have to follow my directions. Like the other person mentioned you could then explain why you do things the way you do them and then let her decide if she wants to do things your way or not at all. Since, you are not her natural mother, she is probably testing you to see what she can get away with. There is no need to argue with her or bring yourself to her level but you will need to establish yourself as the adult early on or you will be stuck in a situation where the children rule over you. That is something that nobody wants.
2006-09-28 21:24:16 · answer #2 · answered by stranger_grrrl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could have patiently explained that you don't want her to hurt herself, and that you would like to show her the correct way to prepare the french fries. As it stands, it sounds like you are in competition with the ten year old. You are the adult in the situation, and that's how you should behave. Not get mad and cancel the experience because neither of you could have your way.
2006-09-28 21:05:51 · answer #3 · answered by Sassy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So she starts off as being a 10 y.o., but evidently it took you so long to type the story she ended up being 11 by the end of it? Uhm,unless u,her or her brother are pregnant post this somewhere else.
2006-09-28 23:38:14 · answer #4 · answered by *Juicy Princess* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, 11 year olds are tough - they are entering teenagedom and you are in for a grilling, to be sure!
Take it in stride. It is especially difficult when you are not their natural mother. Even if you were, nothing you do will ever be right until they are old enough to understand - like 23 or 24! So hang tough, they will remember how you were patient with them or when you weren't when they are older - so if you care, take it easy on them and don't expect them to be angels because no pre-teen or teenager is. They are actually, quite honestly, dreadful!
Take care!
2006-09-28 21:00:35 · answer #5 · answered by thisisuandme 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A 10 year old doesn't get the trouble that can come from spilling hot grease on herself.
YOU are the adult, be the adult and set boundries. Who cares what looks she gives you, she doesn't have the life experiance (and neither does the 22 yo)
2006-09-28 21:00:34 · answer #6 · answered by Venus__27 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What ARE you talking about???? French fries, eggs, immigrant step children?????? Whats the question? Is someone pregnant??
2006-09-28 21:01:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Is the 10 year old pregnant? If not, find a different place to vent.
2006-09-28 20:57:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Way to go. It is so good to hear that You are being the mom. Excellcent job as far as I concern, My mom used to say, "I'm not your friend, I'm your mother!"
2006-09-28 21:10:01 · answer #9 · answered by easterbaby1975 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
parenting is difficult - that's the fact...
it doesn't matter what they say, you are the parent and you are obligated to do the right thing, say the right thing, be kind but firm.
2006-09-28 21:03:21 · answer #10 · answered by bl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋