have any of you ever tried ferberizing your baby? if so how did it go? what did you do? my daughter is 6 mo.?

Answer 1

Well, I understand that some people think that this is barbaric...and that's their opinion, but try living life with a child who refuses not only to sleep on their own, but with anyone else, as well. First, let me address a few concerns, my son didn't get the idea that I didn't care about him...he still loves his mommy and always comes to me for comfort. Second, regardless of what Ferber once thought, or thinks now, it is important to let a child realize, at some point, that they must learn to comfort themselves. You can't be with them every second of every day, and they need to learn some coping skills.

Alright, now, I didn't exactly ferberize my son.....I simply taught him that he must sleep, in his own bed, by himself. We started by rocking him to sleep, as usual, at nap time, and then putting him in his crib to sleep, instead of the swing or our bed. Then we started laying him down almost asleep, and gently patting his back until he fell asleep. Then we stopped patting, but stayed close by. Then we quietly backed out of the room and shut the door. These steps each went over a few days.

Now my son is an active, healthy, and happy, 13 month old.....each night he has his bath, brushes his 6 little teeth(with mommy's help), gets on his pajamas and a diaper, reads a book, takes his Zyrtec, and gets into bed with a sippy cup of milk. Each night I repeat the same words, "I love you, and I'll see you in the morning, sleep good"....at nap time, we say "I love you, and I'll see you in a little while, have a good nap". He never cries when going to sleep, not for a nap or at night.

I'm not saying this will be as easy with your daughter, but it might very well be. A couple of helpful hints...don't wash her blanket before the move, if she is used to sleeping with you, let her sleep with you, with her own blanket, for a few nights, so that the smell is familiar. If she has a special toy, move that with her as well. And remember that she is just a baby. It is NOT going to hurt her to cry, it's part of what babies do. Just be sure to spend plenty of time with her during the day, and make sure she knows that night is for sleeping.

Answer 2

Ferberizing is a terrible idea that even Ferber has backed away from.

When you leave a child to cry, you teach it 1)you don't care [c'mon, what else ccan she conclude?] and 2)she can't do anything to help herself.

A child's brain floods with stress hormones when Mommy isn't around. This is evolutionarily created for the baby's survival. Now, this flood impairs learning and raises the baby's risk of anxiety and depression.

Take your child to bed with you as nature designed and let her fall asleep happy and secure instead of afraid, lonely, and wondering what her mother's problem is.


--baby talk is fine - the high pitch and repetitive syllables match their receptors. also, use big words and long complex sentences, too.

and let's not take the results of non-ferberizing as proof that ferberizing is okay. that answer below trying to make that connection is illogical.

Answer 3

I agree with everyone but, I also believe that at some point the baby should be able to fall asleep on its own in his/her crib. I also think that when you Ferberize you teach the baby that it's crib is a place of punishment. It should be a place of safety, relaxation, and enjoyment. If you are really having that big of a problem then find the Baby Whisperer Book by Tracy Hogg it helps teach techniques that will not hurt the child. She has three books out they are a very wise investment if you can't afford them then see if they are in your local library.

Answer 4

there are things i agree with like not using baby talk on your baby....because they need to here what they are supposed to say...they learn by copying us

i didn't agree with his thoughts on letting a baby cry....but he recently changed his veiws on that...so that proves that there are flaws in his techniques...because it is common sense a baby needs to feel secure....he now thinks that before 12 months you should respond everytime they cry

some of his techniques are helpful but don't follow and book word for word

i have a 6 year old and and a 8 month old girls...they have exceeded all my expectations and all i do is spend as much time with them as i can...that is the best thing any parent can do....doing things together is what they will bring into their childrens lives

Answer 5

Don't do that...my mom tried it with me, and it did NOT work. I kept crying and screaming and she felt bad. So I ended up sleeping in my parents bed until I was like 7. o_o But its okay, just don't let your poor baby cry herself to sleep! If she sleeps at all! :)

Answer 6

That's terrible... stop being selfish and show your daughter you care... that's if your do....