i need to be happy.i've suffered long enough,and i want to be free.7 yrs too long.i'm done.i want a divorce and i have two kids that i want to take w-me.and he's gonna make it hell for me.he knows the only reason i stayed so long, was for the kids.i'm done with that reason.he's abusive in many ways and im so scared to tell him.i have to hide my moneybecause he takes it from me.i want to be happy,me.i want my life back.i want to stay in the town where i live so my kids can stay in school.but i dont know if that will work.but as of right now? i just want a happier life.im finding myself takeing it out on my kids..and im not that kind of person..i have no money for a lawyer,so i desperately,desperately,need advice.and please...no smart remarks..i cant take any of those any more,,i dont know how im gonna tell him..but i know i gotta sooner or later.any advice? any at all?.....thanks for your time...sad in minnesota.
2006-09-28 11:26:51 · 10 answers · asked by help me 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Were you physically abused? you didn't mention it. If that is your case, most likely you might be successful in getting a divorce..
2006-09-28 11:31:21 · answer #1 · answered by dtmc542006 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It doesn't matter what kind of abuse it is...it is wrong! You shouldn't have to put up with it. If you are scared, get out! Don't you have any friends or family that can take you in and give you a safe place to stay until you figure out what the next step is? If you cannot get away and feel in danger, get a restraining order against him. You need to think of your kids and the damage that can be done with them witnessing this abuse. I know what you are going through. I had to leave a VERY abusive relationship of ten years and it wasn't easy to do. I can share with you my experience if you would like to contact me. I am a very good listener and am here if you need someone!
2006-09-28 11:36:49 · answer #2 · answered by swtz69drmz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a child of an abused mother, you need to do it as soon as possible. There is no reason to wait. If he is physically abusive, call the police and have them there when you leave. There are shelters and places that you can go to that will help you. Do not hesitate. The longer that you stay, the more that you are conditioning your children that your relationship is okay. If you want them to be strong individuals, you need to be strong for them. The road will be long and hard, but you will make it. They will make it. In the long run you will have taught your children that fighting for their safety is the most important thing. By doing this, you will make them more in tune with the type of relationships that they chose to be in. The kids changing schools is less dramatic than seeing their mother depressed and anxious. Trust me...all will be well. In my thoughts and prayers...much love to you and yours.
2006-09-28 11:39:37 · answer #3 · answered by lalatam 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen up ma'am,I'm not here to make any smart remarks I just wanna help you,but anyway go either to a shelter for abused women or get a restraining order either way it goes you can do both because with a restraining order he has to stay away from you and your family. Because you are not happy and you don't have to deal with his stuff any longer sweety I'm not here to judge you I'm here to help you, and if you know what's best please get your family out that situation before you or your kids or even him end up dead and I know you don't want that you have your children to think about. If you like to respond back email me at cherrykanisha@yahoo.com.Im here for you when no one else is.
2006-09-28 11:45:54 · answer #4 · answered by Sister Queen Mama 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look in the yellow pages for a divorce lawyer. Most will counsel you for free the first time.
Seek a divorce. Get out and be happy. You and your kids deserve it.
2006-09-28 11:35:24 · answer #5 · answered by wayouthere 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your husband is abusive you need to get out of that marriage. If you stay your not only hurtingyourself your hurting your children. There are other ways to divorce when you have no money. you can go to your county and get a public defender.
2006-09-28 11:36:45 · answer #6 · answered by shyhonney 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have you made threats to your husband if he doesn't act right your leaving? this is not only hurting you love its hurting your kids do what best for your children they need you to be the strong one . don't give in because you think the kids need a father they need a stable house hold. they will learn bad things from this abusive relationship , hey there a place you can call for help on legal fees if you want to get ou and be free, :1(800 )339-6963 call them maybe it would help you . i pray deeply for you and your children may God keep you from harm.
2006-09-28 11:43:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ive been in your position firstly dont tell him just go that way he cant try and stop you and you wont be putting yourself or your kids in danger go to the police tell them about the violence and get a restraining order against him so he cant come near you or your kids. go and see a lawyer you maybe able to get legal aid its worth a try and it worked or me. hope this helps be safe an be happy good luck.
2006-09-28 11:34:48 · answer #8 · answered by rosierotweiller 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look up a local family shelter and GO! When he leaves one day just go without telling him. They will help you with everything.
2006-09-28 11:50:30 · answer #9 · answered by Carrie! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart sweety. In the bible it states that marraige is honory in God's eyes, that's true. Now when it comes to abuse that grounds for divorce. Anytime your with your husband and your scared to tell him how you feel due to his negative behavior or violent reaction, then move on PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-28 11:42:56 · answer #10 · answered by foxy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋