a friend of mine keeps wanting to borrow my car anyway that he can--how do i say no without feeling bad?

Question

i mean..he asked once, ok thats fine. i'll let him. for an "emergency" (to buy cigarettes). then he asked a few times again..this time, to pick up his brother from school. then he asked yet AGAIN, to visit his friend real quick (which was another "emergency") at this point i was ANNOYED. like i was being taken advantage of for being TOO NICE the first few times. but i let it slide. THEN, he asked if he could take my car yet AGAIN, to the store. and since i had a few errands for him to do..i let him borrow it again. thats the FIFTH time in like about a month!!

then TODAY, he asked if i could drive him to work. and yes, i said ok (since i was on my way out anyway). then later, he said work didn't need him. and then asked me AGAIN, if he could borrow my car! i said that i'm going somewhere..and offer to give him a ride. but INSTEAD, he turn the table around and was like.."how bout i drop YOU off with your car and pick u up later"? is this guy NUTS?!?!

the thing is..it's a LEXUS..and not a family junk car. i paid $33,000 for it and don't want any more miles than i put on it.

he NEVER fills up gas (cause he doesn't have $)

and NO, the insurance is not under his name at all.

.::sigh::.

i think he HATES ME now for saying NO..what to do?

Answer 1

He is USING YOU for your car. Start telling him no he cant use your car unless its absolutely an emergence None of those were even close to emergencies. Tell him to get a job so he can save up for a car. You must be firm when you speak to him. Or if he does use your car make him at least pay for gas.

Answer 2

"If you give an inch, they'll take a mile."

Determine a reasonable rate to charge him per hour (gas, maintenance, etc) and tell him, each time he does this, that he owes you that amount of money. Be sure to add in some "pain in the butt" factor for the fact that when he has the car, you can't use it.

Like anything else, if you "borrow" someone else's resources, if you only borrow a small amount, its not worth keeping track of. If you borrow a lot (and clearly he has), then you need to keep track of it and "balance the books."

By the way, insurance is a real issue. Most policies do not allow heavy use by a second, unlisted driver. Indeed, if that car is in an accident, you could conceivably be liable, even if you aren't anywhere near it.

Answer 3

If he has an accident in your car, not only may you not be covered by your insurance (chances are, other drivers are not covered unless you are in the car at the time), you may be held liable if the accident is his fault and he personally does not have auto insurance. He's taking advantage of your sweet nature... JUST SAY NO and give him those reason if you must... has he even helped with gas? Is he gonna help pop for repairs/ or maintenance when the car needs it? Most probably not... the guy is a leach... cut him off at the knees! I've dealt with bloodsuckers like him, all take & no give... they use people & take no responsibility for "their share." Tell him to "Bugger Off!"

Answer 4

You are nuts. You opened a door you should have left closed. When the emergency proved false, you should have called him on it and told him not to play you like that any more. Now you just have to let him know you are not comfortable letting him or anyone else use your car except for real emergencies. Let him know how that affects your insurance rate and how it changes the way your car drives and that you are not willing to go that route.

Answer 5

A friend would not ask like this. The law is that say he borrows your car and he runs into a chain link fence tearing it down or he hits another car and really injures someone in it, who is responsible??? You my friend, you are responsible for all repairs and medical expenses. Your insurance goes up and you may not even have the car again if he wrecked it. I say NO NO NO! Do not lend your car to anyone.

Answer 6

Even though he is your friend and it may be extremely hard to say, you need to tell him no. The fact that he said "how bout i drop you off with your car and pick you up later" is a bit extreme.Make sure you explain why you don't want him to use it. I know you'll probably feel bad but its your car and he could wreck it!

Answer 7

Respectfully, if anyone is nuts it's you for letting him use your car so much when you don't want to. Next time say no. If you have trouble standing your ground, and I suspect from the history here related that you do, you could tell him that to save money you have altered your insurance coverage and it no longer extends to occasional drivers and only you are covered. If he persists fight the urge to cave and say "Look, I said No. I meant it. Stop asking."

Answer 8

You have learned a valuable lesson. Your parents should realise that you are children and you may never get your money back. Don't pool your money again. DIana was dumb for puting $20 in a community purse. However, as you are young, the whole purpose of giving you money is to teach you things like this. If your parents are truly angry, it makes me wonder why they are nieve enough to expect a child to be full grown Ever heard the phrase fool me once its on you, fool me twice, its on me? You knew Alexa has stolen money. She will do it agian. Stop putiing your money together. Better luck next time.

Answer 9

hy u need to draw a border somewhere..he may be ur friend doenst necessarily mean u fulfill all his demands..tell him sori u might need ur car during the day or u may have something coming come and might need ur car..tell him..listen buddy tiem u buy ur own car after all u seem to need a lot for errands...

responsibility comes at a early age is good and better ...u need to teach him that rather then spilong him by fulfilling all his demands...

Answer 10

He is definately taking advantage of your kindness, I used to do the same thing with my friends until the other day they hit my car. And until this day i still dont know which one of them did it. I asked and nobody knows, in the long run it worked out better because nobody will ever ask again. It did cost me to fix it thow, dont make the same thing happen to you.