My friend got married when she was 18. Whe was a virgin when she got married and only lost it to her hubby.
I on the other had got married at 25 and I did it (had sex) with my then boyfriend (which is now my hubby) before we got hitched.
she kept saying to me how much of a saint she is and what a good girl and what morals she is because she waited till she got married. but all i kept thinking was
"helooo, u got married at 18. you were so young. of course you waited".
I lost my virginity at 22, and yes, I did it before I got married but then again, I was not ready to get married at such a young age (22), or even 18 like she did.
she keeps badgering me "why didn't I wait". i tell her that I was ready to have sex way before I was ready to say I DO.
and technically, she lost her virginity before me!!! why is she even arguing?
what do u think?
2006-09-28 09:39:48 · 16 answers · asked by chapped lips 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I'm sorry ...i thought this was 2006...
i must have got lost back when i was cruising in that delorean time machine...
is this 1955 or what now?
oh wait , that was a fiction, but wow!, you do take me back to those old days...
nowadays there is no stigma attached to premarital sex!
the way i look at it is like the way a protestant can do confession...
a catholic has to go to a priest to do confession,
a protestant (supposedly, if he does it like he's supposed to)
can confess directly to god in his own prayers.
well , the same with virginity... if you love the person with all your heart , etc.
that's better than a 'legal' marriage because it's not the government that makes you a 'match made in heaven'
you tell her that you knew God was okay with your choice,
and because people paired off long before marriage was invented,
and i was a virgin when i married my 1st time, it didn't work out...
we divorced..
and my buddy made a girl pregnant before they married and they are still married!
so who is holier?
well, that's all i got to say about that.
2006-09-30 23:18:13 · answer #1 · answered by dwh 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She's probably a bible thumper that has nothing better to do than judge other people's decisions. Would you buy a car without test driving it? True, sex does not rule a relationship but it is a big part of one.
The better question is why wait? As long as you were safe about it and it was a mutual decision, why does being married matter? One day its not ok to have sex, the next day its fine...just because you stood in a church or before a judge and he said it was ok?
I think you do what's best for you. She does what's best for her and you leave it at that. By the way, I almost guarantee you have a better sex life than her because you did it before marriage...
2006-09-28 09:47:12 · answer #2 · answered by Achaholic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she is just hung up on technicalities here. The fact of the matter is you both lost your virginity's to the one you love and that is all that matters. Tell her that your lives are not a competition and that you need a friend who is more interested in sharing your life and supporting you than looking down on you over such a silly issue.
2006-09-28 09:45:53 · answer #3 · answered by rkrell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the practice is to be a virgin when you are married. Age does not define when the virginity is lost or the marriage will occur. Premarital sex is sex before marriage. Any sex........ Congrats that you married the man you lost your virginity to but it was still premarital sex. Sorry. I doubt this was the answer you were looking for.
2006-09-28 09:47:50 · answer #4 · answered by cytopia1 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont see an issue with tattoos. I dont like the those which have their legs and fingers and the best deal of their body coated in tattoo, yet I do have one tattoo. it really is Carpe Diem (Latin for grab the day) in black ink over my abdomen button, so as that once i'm status in the front of the mirror contained in the morning, i will make certain you're making each day the suitable it could be.
2016-11-25 01:09:52 · answer #5 · answered by lofty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there are lots of people in the world who are not virgins when they marry. now to some this represents being a good girl who felt it was wrong. having sex is a personal choice only two people should be concerned with and those are the ones it involves. don't second guess yourself or your decision i would just tell my friend you're glad she is happy with her decision and that you're happy with yours and that you wont discuss it again.
2006-09-28 09:49:24 · answer #6 · answered by josh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has low self esteem. I bet you ANYTHING she was not a virgin and she is feeling guilty and she's projecting those feelings onto you. The next time you talk to her, tell her "What's in the past is past and if you can't move on from this and stop bringing it up, we can't be friends anymore". Don't let her guilt you - it's not what a good friend does. Either way, she has low self esteem and is trying to boost herself up by putting you down. You should show her all the answers here!
2006-09-28 09:49:42 · answer #7 · answered by ggirl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it's a silly thing to argue about. maybe she's jealous that SHE didn't wait longer to get married?? maybe she regrets doing it so young. I don't know. If anyone has to be right, it's you. You were ready and you did it. You weren't married, but who cares? You ended up marrying him!!
2006-09-28 09:50:09 · answer #8 · answered by gidget 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everybody wants to feel superior to somebody. I guess it's important to her. But then she's right on Christian technicality. You might want to answer that the end result is you're both getting it regularly from your choice men and aren't you both lucky!
2006-09-28 09:49:32 · answer #9 · answered by lmcbuilder 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I, think she is trying real hard to justify her chose. Which means that deep down inside she probably regrets it
2006-09-30 12:09:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋