My boyfriend is 19 and he won't get a job. He is living with his dad and is mouching off of him. I have been with him for 3 years and I want to start a family. What do I do?
2006-09-28 09:18:51 · 44 answers · asked by Jewels 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
find another boyfriend...if he truly cared for you he would be concerned about being able to provide..don't you think....if he can't take care of himself please don't put the poor fellow in the position of having to care for a family as well....he'll wind up hating you for sure....he's got years to go before he's ready for that
2006-09-28 09:22:22 · answer #1 · answered by kardea 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At some point he will have to get a job but he is too lazy to do that if he keeps it up he will be working at a low income job and will have a problem to support a family. Most people that work at these jobs have 2 or 3 jobs to support just them or their family. but if he has no desire to get into something most likely he will be 30 years old living at home or on the streets. or Girl friend supporting him ( at this point that means you) So now you need to make a choice and tell him he needs to get a job or you are going to leave him. That is unless you want to support him but I don't think so. I also want to add that some guys are like that and they will not work and mooch off of their girlfriends for money and a place to stay. I am 20 and I am in a good job
2006-09-28 14:02:08 · answer #2 · answered by Bullz_ eye 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I assume that you are somewhat older, in lucrative employment yourself with fair savings.
Surely you need to stop hassling this young lad who just wants to enjoy HIS life before settling down to care for a family of his own.
If you are really that desperate to get married and have a family, I suggest finding another boyfriend, at least 25 years old who wants the same things you do.
You cannot force someone to do something that they do not really want to do, and if you try (and he goes along with you), it will only end up blowing up in your face and causing you far bigger problems, problems that you will be able to ill afford if you have Children by then.
If you are also so young, you may want to consider whether Children are best for you too at such an early age, Children are not accessories, they are a life-long commitment, your boy-friend understands this, so should you.
Also.....whats 'mouching'?
2006-09-28 09:44:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump him and find a real boyfriend, one that can be bothered to at least go out to work and can then afford to treat you like you deserve. Don't know how old you are, but why do you want to start a family so young? Live a little first, experience life. Don't get stuck in a rut for the rest of your life, for your sake as well as for your children when the day comes to have them.
2006-09-28 11:50:58 · answer #4 · answered by rikerlock 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start a family? At 19? And he's living @ home w/o a job? Well, sweetheart I think you're a ways away from accomplishing that goal! A family takes A LOT of responsibility and financial security, and maturity. A guy who allows his dad to insult his gf clearly isn't mature...good luck
2006-09-28 12:42:19 · answer #5 · answered by *Juicy Princess* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, how old are you? If you are anywhere near his age, slow down! You are way, way too young to get married and start a family and so is he!
Second, if he is only 19, it's possible that he is aware that he is too young to start a family and has decided that he wants to live a little bit of life before settling down and getting married.
Third, if you are still with him when he is 29 and the situation is still unchanged, then RUN LIKE HELL! He is a dead beat and you will never be happy with him.
2006-09-28 09:26:50 · answer #6 · answered by Desiderata of Happiness 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's only 19, that's really young! Maybe by not wanting a job, he's sending you a signal that he's not ready for the commitment of a family and having to provide. Talk to him about your feelings to make sure he's on the same page.
2006-09-28 09:20:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Have a talk with him and make it clear what you expect and need out of him. If he can't be the man you need and want then dump him and find a man will not only love you but is grown up enough to take responsibility for his life and a relationship with you.
2006-09-28 09:25:13 · answer #8 · answered by rkrell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's 19 and has no desire to start a family for another 5-6 years ATLEAST! Move on if you don't want to wait that long.
2006-09-28 09:20:26 · answer #9 · answered by tbayxxxv 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave him and find someone who is willing to work with you in an honest and loving way.
If your boy friend is a moocher, you are invieting trouble into your life, you will end up leaving him anyway.
He maybe cool, cute or what ever. its time to grow up and out of that frame of mind, if you want to be serious with and about someone.
you can get good love (sex) anywhere. your boy friend really does not respect you and if you think about it, you more than likely do more for the relationship, than what he does. If that is the case, LEAVE HIM.
2006-09-28 09:30:12 · answer #10 · answered by WOODSAK 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you want to start a family and get a job that will support all of you until your kids are grown - get rid of him...after all, why should he work? He's got a good thing going for himself! Don't you think you deserve better? So, get rid of the deadbeat!
2006-09-28 09:29:10 · answer #11 · answered by crazylilwhitewoman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋